


Hundreds of (Incredibly Unfortunate and Tragic) Stories

by pikaace



Category: In the Heights - Miranda
Genre: Family Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Gen, Minor Character Death, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Other Character Tags to be Added - Freeform, Possible Character Death, Protective Siblings, Triggers, based on the books and the netflix series, i'll try my best to not make that happen, other relationship tags to be added - Freeform, probably minor ooc-ness, slight domestic violence, slight physical abuse
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-01-18
Updated: 2018-03-29
Packaged: 2018-09-18 07:06:30
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 15
Words: 39,567
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9373538
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pikaace/pseuds/pikaace
Summary: Based on Lemony Snicket's A Series of Unfortunate Events.An ordinary day becomes a nightmare, as Usnavi, Sonny, and Chip lose everything in a terrible fire. Family, friends, a home, they have absolutely nothing...except for a large fortune that's not to be used until Usnavi turns 28 due to a specific will. Until Usnavi comes of age, the De la Vegas are taken to stay with a distant relative, known as Count Rodriguez. But they quickly discover that he's only after their fortune, and will do whatever is necessary to get his hands on it.The small family of three must do everything they can to survive, as the madman chases them, as their shipped to relative after relative. But it seems that wherever they go, Count Rodriguez and a series of unfortunate events seem to follow, peppered with questions and mystery. Was the fire really an accident? Were there survivors? And just who is Count Rodriguez, and what is being kept from the De la Vegas?





	1. 1.1

If you’re looking for a happy story, I’d advise you to close this page in your browser and find another story, perhaps on another website.

I know that the characters portrayed in this story are usually placed in a happy environment, with bittersweet turns of life, such as winning a lottery ticket, or decorating store fronts with beautiful and meaningful pictures.

You will find none of that here.

You will only find misery and inconvenience with the occasional touching scene that will quickly be crushed by even more unfortunate events. If you are still reading beyond this point, I applaud your tenacity. If you are truly here to stay for the entirety of this story, then let us begin.

* * *

 

“How about this one?”

“Too big.”

Sonny sighed and tossed it away into the water, before picking up another rock. “How about this one?”

“Close; too rough.” Usnavi answered.

“Wait, you want a smooth rock, from under the Washington Bridge?” Sonny asked.

“I’ve told you, you can’t skip rough rocks, Sonny.” Usnavi sighed. “I need a flat, smooth one.”

“Then just ask Chip to make one!” Sonny protested, gesturing to the husky, sitting little ways away in the sun.

“You can’t rely on Chip for everything.” Usnavi said.

Sonny rolled his eyes and scanned the ground some more, “You just want me to do all the work.”

Now is probably a good time to tell you that these are the main characters of our story, Usnavi, Sonny, and Chip De la Vega. They were…a special bunch, for lack of a better word. Special as in, when Usnavi’s parents told them to spend some time outside, they prefer to go and hang out under the large bridge near their neighborhood of Washington Heights.

“Why did _Tia_ Luz and _Tio_ Luis send us out anyway?” Sonny asked.

Usnavi shrugged, “Maybe they just wanted us out of the house.”

“The bodega is technically ‘out of the house’” Sonny pointed out. “If they wanted to take our shifts they didn’t have to send us out. They didn’t even want us to go to Pete, or the salon, they literally wanted us out of the barrio.”

Usnavi shook his head, “You can be too curious for your own good, _mijo_.” He said. “Let’s just ask when we get back.”

Sonny shrugged and went back to his task. “How about this one?” He asked, holding up a rock.

Usnavi squinted at it, “Yeah…I think that will work,” Sonny lit up. “but it’s still a bit too rough.”

Sonny groaned, “That’s it; Chip!”

The dog perked up and Sonny threw the rock to him. The husky caught it and began to gnaw on it; in a matter of seconds, the rock was as smooth as could be.

Usnavi picked it up, giving Sonny a look, “Lazy.”

“Bossy.” Sonny shot back, but smiles tugged on both their faces.

Usnavi gripped the rock in his right hand and took out his father’s hat, placing it on his head. Despite it belonging to his father, Usnavi always loved that hat. His father always let him wear it when he wanted and the habit carried over into adulthood. Whenever Usnavi put that hat on, he felt confidant, smart, just like his father. With that hat, he could think up things that no one imagined he could think of.

Usnavi gave the rock a sharp throw with a flick of his wrist. The rock skipped across the water, bouncing multiple times until it hit the leg of the bridge with a loud clang.

“See? Whenever Chip makes the rocks, it’s so much better!” Sonny pointed out.

Usnavi shook his head, “I know, but you need to learn to do thing for yourself, _mijo.”_

“I know; that doesn’t mean I can’t enjoy it while it lasts.” Sonny responded.

Despite Usnavi and Sonny being cousins they were as close as family could be. Some may compare or mistake their relationship to those of brothers, or even that of a father and son, as Usnavi practically raised the younger De la Vega for most of his life after Sonny’s mother passed away in a terrible fire and the father was nowhere to be found.

Chip was just as close to his two humans, as they took him off the street as a puppy when they were children. How close were they? Well, how many people do you know who know their dog so well that they can understand the series various dog noises he makes?

For example, the two cousins stopped what they were doing as Chip barked, because it translated into, _‘Who’s that over there?’_ Sure enough, someone was making their way to their spot under the bridge.

Usnavi squinted and recognized the figure, “It’s Mr. Adams.”

“From the bank?” Sonny asked, moving next to him, along with Chip.

It was indeed, Mr. John Adams from the bank, specifically the banker that took care of the financial needs of the barrio. He knew everyone there fairly well, but they unfortunately didn’t know him very well.

“Ah, Usnavi, Sonny,” Adams said with a few deep breaths, a bit winded from hiking the somewhat treacherous path that led under the bridge.

_‘And Chip.’_ Chip barked.

“What are you doing all the way out here?” Usnavi asked.

“Looking for you, of course.” Adams answered. “I’m afraid I have some terrible news.”

It was thoughtful of Mr. Adams to begin with that statement, as it usually serves its purpose to prepare the listener; but I’m afraid, not even that could prepare the De la Vegas for what they were about to hear.

“I’m sorry to say that your parents and many others have perished in a terrible fire that has destroyed your entire neighborhood.”

Silence quickly followed, as dismay, disbelief, and despair quickly made their way onto the two cousins’ faces.

“Perished means killed.” Adams continued.

“We…We know…” Sonny said softly, staring at the ground with wide eyes.

For those who don’t know what it’s like to receive news such as this, it takes a while for a reaction to fully set in; and it certainly didn’t help that Usnavi and Sonny had no idea how to react.

That reaction was further delayed when Mr. Adams brought them back to their home…or what was left of it.

The entire street was covered in smoke, as the skeletal remains of multiple buildings were all that were left of the barrio. The bodega, their apartment, the salon, the dispatch, and almost every other building on the street, was gone. They wandered through the buildings they used to know so well, their memories briefly replacing the destruction with what they used to be before.

Sonny walked through an alley to find a spray can that was burnt to a crisp. Sonny knelt down and shakily picked it up, “Pete…” He whispered, before the can shattered into dust. He was planning to make a new mural this afternoon. Sonny could barely see the remains of Pete’s past pictures on the destroyed walls.

Usnavi stepped into the dispatch, walking over to the destroyed booth and microphone; Benny was supposed to have a day off today. He insisted on coming in to work and Mr. Rosario allowed it.

But the feeling was even worse when they stepped into the charred rubble that used to be their family’s beloved bodega. All the trinkets and snacks that were sold there had been reduced to burnt chunks of black; even the register and its contents was unrecognizable. They could even see the remains of their apartment above them and around them, as the burnt furniture had fallen through the weakened floors.

Usnavi looked down as glass cracked under him; it was a familiar framed photograph. It depicted a young Usnavi and Sonny, standing in front of their parents, while Sonny held a squirming puppy Chip; behind them was the bodega, completely new and refurbished.

The day they took that picture was the fifth anniversary the bodega opened. Abuela had taken the picture; it took them an hour to teach her how to use it. Everyone was smiling widely; even Chip seemed happy despite being squeezed by Sonny’s chubby little arms.

Usnavi felt his vision blur with tears, “It’s all gone…” He rasped. Every building they knew, every beloved person that lived on this little block…they were all gone. It was such a wave of shock, he couldn’t even feel the crushing feeling of loss that was multiplied by the number of people who perished.

Nina…Lincoln…Carla…the Piraguero…Vanessa…oh god, Vanessa…

Usnavi put a hand on his heart, almost feeling it shatter into pieces. Chip whined as he wandered around the charred remains of the only home he ever had. All the familiar scents, all the bite marks he left as a teething puppy, it was all gone.

Chip poked his nose into a cabinet under the counter and nudged something round. He gave a soft snort, _‘I found something.’_

Sonny came over to him as Chip pulled out the object, dropping it in Sonny’s hand. It was a strange cylinder with a strange design covering it. Sonny didn’t think much of it, but pocketed it anyway. Maybe Usnavi knew what it was.

“Now, I want to assure you three,” Adams started talking again. “you have nothing to-”

“Yeah…we have nothing.” Sonny muttered.

“Well, not nothing.” Adams said. “They did leave you one thing.”

“What?” Usnavi asked, wiping his eyes.

“Financial security.” Sonny and Usnavi exchanged a glance in pure confusion. “Luz and Luis De la Vega left behind a will, stating that if they should perish, their remaining fortune would go to the three of you.” Adams continued.

“F…Fortune?” Usnavi asked softly with wide eyes.

“Fortune, as in…” Sonny trailed off in disbelief.

“A very large sum of money that can easily support all three of you for the rest of your days.” There was a beat of silence. 

Usnavi stared at the ground in shock, “But-but that-that can’t be…” He stammered. “We-we were barely scraping by as is-”

“You’re saying that _Tia_ Luz and _Tio_ Luis had money this whole time?!” Sonny cut in. “We were never poor?!”

“Yes, but it was money that was to be used only for emergencies, such as this.” Adams said. “It will be Usnavi’s to use when he turns twenty-eight.”

Sonny frowned, “Don’t you usually get inherited things when you turn eighteen?” He asked.

“That would be the case if they had perished beforehand.” Adams answered. “Since they didn’t, and Usnavi is now twenty-four, the age of inheritance has moved up.”

“That’s one specific will…” Sonny muttered.

“Yes, well,” Adams cleared in throat. “In the meantime, gather what you have; we have to go.”

“Gather what?” Sonny asked sharply, earning a small smack.

“Go where?” Usnavi asked.

“Why, to your new home of course!” Adams said. “I mean, you didn’t expect to stay here did you? And since the fortune isn’t yours for four more years, you don’t exactly have options.”

_‘Don’t sugarcoat it…’_ Chip snorted.

“Yeah really…” Sonny softly agreed.

“So where will we go?” Usnavi asked.

“The will stated that you are to live with your closest living relative,” Adams answered. He went to his car and opened the door, “Come along now, De la Vegas.”

The remaining family of three exchanged a glance, and slowly made their way into the car.

The car slowly drove away, and the family of three watched as their ruined home slowly shrank in the distance, unaware that this was the first step into a series of unfortunate events that would slowly shape and haunt their lives forever.


	2. 1.2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which the De la Vegas are introduced to their new guardian and the hardships that now face their lives.

As the buildings of New York flew past them in the car, Mr. Adams had been explaining their situation. They had spent the night at his house with his family, where they were given new clothes to take with them to their new home.

That night was long and tragic, consisting of Usnavi and Sonny finally shedding tears over their lost community, with Chip howling softly. The next day, they were rushed into the car, to be taken to their new guardian.

“Your guardian came highly recommended.” Adams was saying, “His name is Count Rodriguez.”

Sonny and Usnavi glanced at each other, probably hoping that the other had heard the name before, but that wasn’t the case. “How come we’ve never heard of him?” Usnavi asked.

“He’s either your fourth cousin, three times removed, or your third cousin, four times removed; basically, he’s removed.” Adams answered.

Chip barked softly. _‘I think his brain was removed.’_

“Chip!” Usnavi admonished softly while Sonny silently snorted.

“Anyway, this man is very excited to meet you; and he’s an actor so you know his excitement is genuine.” Adams continued. “And he only lives three miles away; and the will specifically stated you were be placed with your closest living relative.”

Sonny made a face, “Does he seriously think that’s what it means?” He whispered to Usnavi.

 _‘His idiocy is the only genuine thing here.’_ Chip whined.

Usnavi shot them both looks to keep it down, “If he lives so close by, why has never come to visit?” He asked Mr. Adams.

“Most likely because he was very busy.” Adams answered. “As a banker, I’m very busy myself, so this drop off is going to be very hasty.” He paused. “Hasty means quickly.”

“We know.” Sonny said, as he turned over the strange object from the bodega in his hands.

“What are you messing with?” Usnavi asked softly.

“Chip found it.” Sonny said, examining the letters and numbers surrounding it and opening the lid, “I think it was _Tia y Tio’s_.”

Usnavi took it and looked at it, “I’ve never seen this before.” He said, shaking his head.

Sonny took it back, “I think it was some kind of telescope, or something?”

Usnavi shrugged, “I don’t know, but-”

“We’re here!” The three De la Vegas climbed out of the car, finding themselves on a very pretty looking neighborhood. Having lived in Washington Heights their entire lives, they had no idea New York was capable of such accommodations.

“Hello there!” The group turned to see a young lady coming towards them from her house, “You must be the De la Vegas! I heard Count Rodriguez was adopting you!”

“Uh, yeah.” Sonny answered; he couldn’t help but smile at the woman’s sunny attitude.

“Um, I’m Usnavi,” The elder greeted, shaking her hand. “And this is my cousin, Sonny, and this is Chip.”

Chip stepped up and licked her hand, as his way of saying _‘How do you do?’_

The woman gave Chip a good scratch on the head, “It’s wonderful to meet you; I’m Theodosia Burr, but you may call me Theodosia or Theo if you prefer.”

“Do you know Count Rodriguez?” Usnavi asked.

“Shockingly, no.” Theodosia said with a slight frown, “Even though he’s my neighbor, I know nothing about him…and probably for good reason.” She gestured and they all turned to see a large, old, rickety house, sitting directly across the street.

It was made of wood, looked dirty, with peeling paint, and seemed to sag to the side slightly. They could even see a tall tower behind it, probably sitting in the backyard. If you’ve ever pictured a haunted house or mansion, this house would most likely look exactly like what you’ve pictured, except perhaps the strange image of an eye on the front door.

 _‘We have to live there?!’_ Chip whined.

They traveled across the street and rang the doorbell, which sent out a chilling melody. They waited for a few moments until an eye appeared through the peephole, which was located in the middle of the large eye on the door.

The door then swung open, letting a chill rush out, and a man stood before them. He was tall, pale, and had short greasy grey hair that almost looked powdered, brushing a pair of dark eyes that seemed almost black and soulless. But his most notable feature, was the strange tattoo of an eye on his left ankle.

“Hello, hello, hello.” The man greeted, smiling widely, revealing crooked and dirty teeth. “I am your beloved Count Rodriguez, your new guardian.”

Usnavi slowly and discreetly reached out and put his arm around Sonny’s shoulders, pulling him closer. Usnavi had very protective tendencies, especially concerning his younger cousin; and you could easily argue that his protectiveness was even greater, now that his parents were gone and Sonny was the only family he had left.

Sonny didn’t object, actually stepping closer to his cousin and gripping Chip’s collar tighter. This is important to note, because being fifteen, Sonny preferred independence over being babied by his older cousin, which is what he tended to do a lot.

Normally, Sonny can handle himself, but when he can’t, people are easily reminded that he is still a young child, finding his place in the world. But when push comes to shove, meaning when things are out of his control, Sonny knew he could always rely on Usnavi, no matter what hardship came their way.

“Please come in,” Rodriguez said stepping aside, “And be sure to wipe your feet so you don’t track mud.”

The three humans did as they were told; Chip even wiped his paws. But they quickly discovered that it was a ridiculous request. The house was filthy in every sense of the word. Clothes, broken objects, empty bottles, and trash was strewn all over almost every square inch of the house, which was only lit by a few dim lightbulbs. All three De la Vegas were struck by shock and disgust; they were meant to live here?!

“It…could use a little work.” Adams commented. Rodriguez’s jaw seemed to clench for a split second, “I know that my humble home isn’t as fancy as you expect, but perhaps with some of that fortune we could-”

“Oh no,” Adams cut it off. “The De la Vega fortune is not to be used for such matters, and is to remain safely locked up until Usnavi turns twenty-eight.”

Rodriguez glanced at the family, “Which one is Usnavi?” He asked softly.

“The eldest.” Adams answered.

“Ah.” Rodriguez nodded, though his eyes seemed to be eating through them, causing Usnavi to tighten his grip on Sonny. This man was giving off way too many warning signs to be a guardian!

“Thank you for bringing them, Mr. Adams; I shall give them a tour of their new home.”

Horror began to dawn on the De la Vegas as Mr. Adams stepped out of the door, “Goodbye De la Vegas; I hope you’ll be happy here!” He called. “And if you have any questions, please stop by the bank!” Sonny almost called after him as the door shut, leaving the De la Vegas alone with Count Rodriguez, who slowly faced them.

“I’m scared.” Sonny whispered.

Usnavi bit his lip, “Me too, _mijo,_ me too.”

* * *

It’s important to point out that first impressions are often wrong, very wrong in some cases. But in very few cases, they turn out completely right.

The De la Vegas were given a brief tour of the large house, and their first impressions became more and more negative. Right away, Rodriguez stated that every day he would have a list of chores for the three of them to complete. “People like you have probably never worked a day in your life.” He had said.

Sonny stepped forward, “What’s that supposed to-”

“Actually,” Usnavi put a hand on his chest, stopping him, “We barely scraped by sometimes; we even ran a store with my parents.”

“Oh really, that’s wonderful!” Rodriguez said in a mocking voice. “Then this list should be no problem.” And he shoved a long list into Sonny’s arms.

Now, you might think these chores would be simple tasks like sweeping or doing the dishes. But, while those were on the list, there were a number of difficult thing as well. Such as repainting the deck outside, or chopping wood, or completely changing the flooring in a large room; tasks that two cousins and a dog with no real mechanical or building experience would find extremely difficult.

The most Usnavi and Sonny did in terms of work was run their family bodega, which mostly included handling money and keeping track of inventory; skills that would not help them at all here. The De la Vegas were responsible for doing their chores, feeding themselves, and staying out of the tower in the backyard, which was the only place they were forbidden to go.

But the worst crime was where they were to sleep. Their room was located on the top floor in a tiny little room that was probably meant to serve as an attic, and there was only one rusty bed with a thin mattress and a thin cotton blanket.

“I’ll leave you to unpack, Orphans.” Rodriguez said as he exited, the last word said in the most scathing manner possible. He slammed the door, leaving the De la Vegas alone.

By this point, your first impression is that Count Rodriguez is a terrible person with no regard for anything other than himself. Well, I’m sorry to say, that your first impression, in this rare instance, is completely right.

 _‘Anyone up for sleeping outside?’_ Chip barked.

Sonny shook his head, “I can’t believe it…I can’t believe we’re stuck here!”

Usnavi sighed, “Sonny-”

“There’s no way we can live here, Usnavi!” Sonny exclaimed. “We’ve only been here for five minutes and I’m already considering jumping out that window! This place is worse than the alleys in the barrio!”

 _‘Sleeping in a dumpster is more appealing than this.’_ Chip barked.

“And that Rodriguez guy is clearly evil!” Sonny went on.

“He’s not evil, Sonny.” Usnavi said.

“Didn’t you see the tattoo on his ankle?” Sonny asked.

“That doesn’t mean he’s evil; lots of people in New York get tattoos.” Usnavi said.

“Yeah, and they’re probably all evil.” Sonny shot back. He walked forward and sat down heavily on the bed, “How could _Tia_ Luz and _Tio_ Luis’ will have us stay here?”

Usnavi sat down next to him, “I’m sure it’s just some misunderstanding, it will get sorted out.” He said. “In the meantime, we’ll just have to make do here.”

“How?” Sonny asked.

“We’ve lived in poor conditions before,” Usnavi said, rubbing Sonny’s back, “We’ll find a way; there’s always a way.”

Sonny didn’t look completely satisfied, but nodded regardless. He reached into his pocket and pulled out the list of chores, looking it over, “Is there a way to redo a floor without any new floorboards?”

Chip whined.


	3. 1.3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I which the De la Vega's life takes a turn for the worst.

The next few days of the De la Vegas’ lives were fraught with hard work and inconvenience. Every morning they woke up, got dressed, and trudged down to the kitchen where all they could make themselves was lumpy stale oatmeal. Not even Chip could find anything salvageable in the pigsty that was Rodriguez’s house.

They were left a note on the dining room table, listing out the chores for the day, signed by Rodriguez with an eye. Luckily, since Rodriguez was out so often, this mean the De la Vegas were spared having him hover over them and taunting them at every turn, making their chores even more difficult than they already were. And it didn’t help that sleeping in one bed was very troublesome, resulting in scarce hours of sleep.

Luckily, Sonny and Usnavi were able to split up the chores and tag team the whole affair, if one was feeling extra tired. One would go up and have the bed to himself to be rejuvenated while the other did the chores the best they could with Chip.

One morning, the note left to them only had one request: Prepare a delicious dinner for myself and my theater troupe of five. Sitting on top of the note was a small bag, and Sonny picked it up with two fingers.

“What is that?” Usnavi asked with a grimace.

“Something greasy.” Sonny answered with a grimace.

Chip gave it a sniff and sneezed, _‘Burn it.’_

It was, in fact, money for them to purchase ingredients, though it wasn’t much. Thankfully, it seemed that this day was going to be easy, seeing as they had no other chores.

“Thank god you know how to cook.” Sonny said.

Usnavi sighed, “Yeah, but there’s really no food we can use here.” He pointed out.

“What do actors even eat?” Sonny asked.

“Daniela said actors will eat anything.” Usnavi said, sending a nostalgic vibe into the air at the mention of their late friend, that was only one of many who perished in that terrible fire.

“Well, I don’t see any cookbooks in this dump.” Sonny said. “I don’t see any books, period.”

Chip barked, looking out the window, _‘How about our neighbor?’_

Usnavi and Sonny looked out the window just in time to see Theodosia Burr getting her mail. Usnavi gave Chip a pat, “Good boy.”

The three hurried out the door and across the street just as Theodosia was heading up her drive, “Well, if it isn’t the De la Vegas!” She greeted.

“Hello, Mrs. Burr,” Usnavi greeted.

“Theodosia, please.” She responded kindly, giving Chip a friendly pat, “My students call me Mrs. Burr.”

“You’re a teacher?” Sonny asked, genuinely surprised.

“I am,” Theodosia nodded. “In fact, that reminds me; Sonny, how old are you? Fifteen?”

“Almost sixteen.” Sonny answered.

Theodosia smiled, “Well in that case, perhaps I’ll see you in school when the summer ends. But enough about me, what can I do for you three?”

“We were wondering if you might have any cookbooks we could look at.” Usnavi said. “We need to make dinner tonight and we’re pretty short on options.”

Theodosia smiled, “Well, you’ve come to the right place.” She led them through her house and into the backyard, where a decent sized building was sitting. She took out a key and unlocked the door, revealing a beautiful room, with hundreds of books lining the walls. There was even a table and chairs, and a rolling ladder to reach the higher shelves; it was as if they had just stumbled into an actual public library.

“This is yours?” Sonny asked in amazement.

“Yes,” Theodosia answered, “There’s mostly law books, but the topics span from Italian Cuisine to the world’s deadliest fungus.”

“Why do you have so many law books?” Sonny asked.

“Well, my husband is a lawyer, and I actually serve as a judge.”

“I thought you were a teacher.” Usnavi said.

“I am; I’m really like a judge understudy.” Theodosia explained. “If the current judge can’t be in court for some reason, I step in.” She smiled, “Thank goodness Aaron is so good at what he does.”

“I don’t think we’ve seen your husband.” Usnavi said.

“Oh, you wouldn’t have,” Theodosia waved her hand, “He’s away on business.”

“What kind of business?” Sonny asked.

“I wish I knew,” Theodosia sighed. “He tells me that it’s important legal matters, but something always tells me that there’s more to it than he’s letting on.” She looked thoughtful, “In fact, Betsey feels the same about her husband.”

“Betsey?” Usnavi asked.

“My fellow teacher at school,” Theodosia answered before smiling, “She’s the most trusting and kindest woman you’ll ever meet; I think you’ll love her if you have class with her, Sonny.”

“I can’t wait.” Sonny said, a smile coming to his face. School sounded infinitely better knowing that kind people like Theodosia were going to be there. That is of course, if Rodriguez even let him go to school when the time came.

“Anyway,” Theodosia clapped her hands together, “The cookbooks are right over here.”

 _“Gracias.”_ Usnavi said gratefully and they got to work.

Usnavi and Sonny each looked through a cookbook while Chip lay under the table, content to be able to lie on a clean smooth floor for once, until Usnavi scooted over, “I think this one should be easy enough.” He pointed to a passage that listed pasta puttanesca. “All we have to do is boil pasta, cut some veggies, and simmer some sauce.”

“Only you can make that sound easy.” Sonny sighed.

 _‘We should just serve them dry bones.’_ Chip softly yowled.

Usnavi sent Chip a snort and looked at Theodosia, who was reading her own book in a chair nearby. “Theodosia, is there a grocery store nearby?”

Theodosia looked up in thought and closed her book, “Not really,” She said, before lighting up. “But there is an outdoor market, just a train ride away.”

To their delight, Theodosia happily escorted them to the market, where they were able to find everything they needed. They thanked her and she smiled, saying they were welcome at any time. The three entered the kitchen, and were just about to get ready to cook, when-

“Ah, Orphans!” Rodriguez said, entering the kitchen, “Is dinner ready?”

“We’re just about to get started.” Usnavi said, Sonny holding up the bags of ingredients.

“Good.” He said as five people peeked in behind him, “My troupe and I are very hungry.”

The De la Vegas looked at the troupe of people and were greeted by a very large variety of people. The most notable was a large muscular man, who had a tuft of brawn hair, and only one eye. A scar ran down the closed unused one, giving the man a much more menacing look. However, despite his appearance to be the brawn with no brains, he was actually of highly average intelligence. He just so happened to be very tall, muscular, and intimidating.

The second was a man who seemed to be covered from head to toe in hair, as it seemed to peek out of every opening in his clothes. His nails were long and dirty, his eyes were wide and yellow like a wolf’s and his teeth were sharp and hard; if he were on all fours, Chip probably would have been tempted to walk over and sniff him in a typical dog greeting.

The third was a man wearing a tank top and jeans; but the strangest thing was that his entire arms were covered in tattoos. His neck had multiple tattoos as well, and they were certain his legs and chest had them too.

The last two were the most normal looking of the bunch. There was a lady, with long blonde hair, her bangs covering her right eye, and she was skinny as a stick; Sonny was surprised that he couldn’t see any bones under her skin.

And the last was a man with regular strawberry blonde hair. Nothing stood out about him, and he seemed to know it, as he kept his head down and looked at the floor like a child who was about to be punished.

"Well then, chop chop, Orphans.” Rodriguez said. “We’ll be in the dining room having wine; don’t keep us waiting.” The large trope exited, and Usnavi and Sonny lay the ingredients out on the table.

“Alright, you open the sauce and start heating it,” Usnavi said, handing Sonny the large can of tomato sauce. “I’ll start on the vegetables.”

Sonny nodded and began rummaging through the drawers, “Is there a can opener?”

“If there is, I haven’t seen it.” Usnavi shook his head, his attention on the vegetables as he washed them.

“Alright then,” Sonny turned and held up the can. “Chip, would you kindly?”

 _‘Lay it on me.’_ Chip barked. Sonny tossed the can which the husky easily caught. Chip placed it on the ground and began working his sharp teeth around the lid. A moment later, the can was opened and Sonny picked it up, dumping it in the pot. Sonny turned on the stove so the sauce could heat up, and began boiling water for the pasta while Usnavi chopped the vegetables, keeping an eye on Sonny.

Having two former parents who used to work late nights, Usnavi was often in charge of cooking meals for himself and Sonny when they were alone for the evening. They also had a neighbor who would sometimes bring them food she made, but Usnavi had a talent for cooking that most likely came from his mother. Soon, the pasta was boiling, and vegetables were in the sauce, and Chip had just finished chopping the parsley to sprinkle on top.

Usnavi went over to Sonny as he carefully stirred the vegetables into the sauce, and smiled, “Look at you, making your own sauce.” He said, giving Sonny a nudge with his shoulder, “Camila would be proud; even though I’m still doing all the hard work.”

“Shut up.” Sonny nudged him back, “Name one other person whose very first cooking task was homemade sauce.” The two shared a laugh.

“Maybe this won’t be so bad after all.” Usnavi said with a shrug. “Remember what _Papi_ said, when he burnt the salsa that time?”

 _‘I still don’t know how he did that.’_ Chip snorted.

Sonny nodded, “Better than nothing.” He recited, and Usnavi smiled. Since the De la Vegas lived a life that was financially lacking, they had been raised to cherish the little they had. For example, while their life with their parents couldn’t afford many luxuries, they appreciated the roof over their head, and that they could always manage to put food on the table while being in each other’s presence.

Once the food was done, they put them in serving bowls and entered the dining room, Usnavi carrying the sauce, and Sonny carrying the pasta. Rodriguez was spouting some theatrical stuff to his troupe while Usnavi and Sonny silently went around the table and served everybody, who started eating with vigor.

They served Rodriguez last, since guests always were served first and Rodriguez frowned at his plate, “Where’s the roast beef?” He asked, alcohol on his breath.

Usnavi and Sonny glanced at each other, “What?” They said in unison.

Rodriguez rolled his eyes, “The roast beef.” He repeated.

Usnavi and Sonny exchanged another look, “We didn’t make any.” Usnavi said carefully. “We made pasta puttanesca.”

“No roast beef?” Rodriguez exclaimed, as if the very idea was offensive to him.

“You didn't tell us you wanted roast beef.” Sonny said in a clipped tone. “You just told us to make dinner.”

“Look at my guests! They can hardly touch this revolting, foreign food!” Rodriguez exclaimed, gesturing to the five seated actors. They all paused their eating and quickly spit out whatever was in their mouths.

Rodriguez sighed and stood up, facing Sonny, “In agreeing to adopt you, I became your father,” Something snapped in Sonny’s eyes as he fixed Rodriguez with a dangerous glare. “and as your father, I am not someone to be trifled with.”

“You can’t go easy on people you take in.” The One-Eyed Man agreed. “They have to learn to respect the ones providing for them.”

“In any case,” Rodriguez then turned to Usnavi, “I demand that you serve roast beef to myself and my guests!”

“We don’t have any!” Usnavi said desperately. “There’s no other food in the house!”

 _‘Just eat what you’re given, you freak.’_ Chip barked, making Rodriguez glower at him.

“Stupid mutt…” Rodriguez kicked the dog away, eliciting a yelp from him.

“Hey!” Sonny moved towards him, but Rodriguez grabbed his arm. Sonny winced as Rodriguez held it in an iron grip and held him still. Usnavi made to come towards them, but Rodriguez held up a hand, stopping him. “Listen closely,” He said in a low voice, “You three are to clean the table, wash the dishes, polish the silver, and then go immediately to your beds.”

"You mean our _bed?”_ Sonny ground out. “You only gave us one!”

“Well then, if you so desperately want another one, you can go out and buy one.” Rodriguez growled.

“You know we don’t have any money!” Usnavi protested.

Rodriguez took a long deep breath and faced him, releasing Sonny’s arm, “You are mistaken.” He said. “You three lucky orphans were left behind with an enormous fortune.”

Sonny stepped towards him angrily, “That money isn’t supposed to used until Usnavi-”

_SMACK!_

Rodriguez had turned swiftly, the back of his hand colliding with Sonny’s cheek. The boy was sent to the ground by the sheer force of the hit, his hat flying off his head, and silence fell over the room like a brick. Usnavi immediately rushed to his side as Sonny sat up, holding his cheek.

"The theater awaits.” Rodriguez announced, and he and the troupe exited the room (some of them taking their plates with them).

Usnavi watched them go before turning his attention back to Sonny, “Are you alright?!”

“No!” Sonny snapped, making Usnavi’s hand flinch away from him. “No…” Sonny repeated softer, still holding his cheek. “No, I’m not alright.”

“Let me see.” Usnavi said, gently pulling Sonny’s hand away. He gently held Sonny’s face so he could get a better look at the red mark now spreading across his cousin’s cheek.

Usnavi silently helped his cousin up and rushed him to the kitchen, holding him close. Luckily, if there was one thing that Rodriguez’s kitchen had an abundance of, it was ice, to keep his alcohol cold. Usnavi easily broke a chunk out of the freezer and wrapped it in a towel, bringing it to Sonny.

“Alright, hold still.” Usnavi said. Sonny winced as Usnavi gently pressed the ice to his cheek, “I know it’s cold; hold it there.”

Sonny did as he was told and Usnavi gently stroked his hair, concern, guilt, and fear swirling in his eyes. “Sonny, I…I’m so sorry, I should’ve…” He trailed off the words hanging in the air.

Sonny sniffed as angry tears came to his eyes, “This isn’t…” He muttered.

“Isn’t what?” Usnavi asked.

“Better than nothing.” Sonny finished bitterly.

Chip whimpered and stepped forward, holding Sonny’s hat in his mouth, which he took. Usnavi’s eyes glassed over as well and he put the ice pack aside, pulling his cousin into a tight hug. Sonny returned it and they two knelt down in each other’s arms, allowing Chip into the hug, with soft whines of sympathy as his humans silently wept.

That night, the De la Vegas managed to fit into their one bed. Usnavi took up most of the middle, while Sonny lay half on him and half on the bed, while Usnavi’s arm acted as his pillow, draped around his shoulders. Chip lay on top of both of them, providing more warmth to the thin scratchy blanket they had. They lay in silence as the rain outside dripped through the leaky roof in corners of the room.

“Tomorrow, we’ll go see Mr. Adams.” Usnavi whispered. “We’re not staying here.”

“I’d rather take my chances on the streets.” Sonny agreed.

 _‘Preach.’_ Chip snuffed. They lay in silence again.

“I wish we could use that fortune now.” Sonny mused. “Then we could buy a mansion with armed guards to keep Rodriguez out.”

“I could have my own store, like Mama and _Papi’s.”_ Usnavi agreed.

 _‘And lots of chew toys.’_ Chip finished.

“There’s no way Rodriguez will let us leave, even if Adams listens to us.” Sonny muttered.

“We’ll find a way,” Usnavi reassured. “There’s always a way.” They lay in silence again, and Sonny began to slowly drift off.

“He’s not my dad.” Sonny muttered.

Usnavi shook his head, “No.” He agreed softly.

“He’ll never be my dad.” Sonny continued, turning slightly towards Usnavi for warmth. “I already got one.”

Usnavi bit his lip and smiled softly, pressing a gentle kiss to Sonny’s temple as his little cousin’s eyes slowly closed.

Chip’s tail wagged slightly and the three slowly but surely fell into a warm but dreamless sleep.


	4. 1.4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which the De la Vegas visit Mr. Adams and Sonny uncovers Count Rodriguez's plot

The next morning, Usnavi was sure to wake them when the house seemed quiet. They got dressed, did a few of their chores, and snuck out of the house, making a beeline for the metro where they went straight to the bank.

A little while later, the three were sitting in Mr. Adams’ grey and dreary office, where the banker was puzzled and surprised to see them, “I don’t have much time to talk today; you’ll have to call ahead next time so I can treat you to lunch.”

“Sorry, but it’s urgent.” Usnavi said.

“Count Rodriguez is crazy!” Sonny exclaimed, getting straight to the point. “Living with him is pure hell!”

“We can’t stay with him!” Usnavi agreed, hoping to get the urgency of the situation across. “He hit Sonny last night!”

But as he spoke, the phone on Mr. Adam’s desk rang loudly. “Excuse me.” Adams picked up the phone. He engaged in a very simple, but boring conversation that lasted around thirty seconds before he hung up. “Now, you were saying? Oh yes, about Count Rodriguez.” He looked at them, “I’m sorry you don’t have a good first impression of him.”

“Our first impressions are spot on!” Sonny argued. “He only gave us one bed!”

“He makes us do tons of difficult chores!” Usnavi added.

 _‘He drinks too much!’_ Chip barked.

The phone rang yet again before Adams could respond, resulting in another boring, thirty second conversation. He hung up and looked at them again, “What were you saying? Ah yes; doing chores doesn’t sound that bad.” Sonny and Usnavi exchanged a look; was this guy for real?!

“He calls us orphans!” Sonny went on.

“He has terrible friends!” Usnavi exclaimed.

 _‘He’s clearly just after our money!’_ Chip howled.

“Hush now, no howling!” Adams snapped, pointing at Chip. He took a deep breath and faced Usnavi and Sonny, “Look, you simply must give yourselves time to adjust to your new home; you have only been there a few days, after all.”

“It feels like it’s been three years!” Sonny protested. “And we already know that this guy is insane!”

“I’m not going to live in a place where we can be smacked around!” Usnavi agreed. “ _Carajo_ , look at Sonny’s bruise!”

Chip growled, _‘Open your eyes for once, you fat motherf-’_

“I’ve heard enough,” Adams stood up from his desk. “Whatever Count Rodriguez has done, he is acting in loco parentis, meaning acting in place of a parent, meaning that he is allowed to raise you how he sees fit.” His face became a bit sympathetic, “I’m sorry if at your old home, you didn’t do household chores, or if you like your old friends better than Count Rodriguez’s-”

“Our old friends are all dead!” Sonny yelled.

“All the more reason to give these new friends a chance; they are alive after all.” That sentence left Usnavi and Sonny speechless. “My point is, these are things you must get used to.”

“I will _not_ ‘get used to’ my cousin being _slapped across the face!”_ Usnavi yelled, letting his rare anger show through.

Unfortunately, that little detail was covered by Mr. Adams coughing loudly and sitting down, “Now, I hate to usher you out posthaste, but I have work to do.” He said. “Posthaste means-”

“That you’ll do nothing to help us!” Sonny snapped.

“Oh, on the contrary,” Adams said. “I’ll have my new assistant escort you home.”

At those words, the door opened and a towering figure entered the office. It was the One-Eyed Man from Rodriguez’s troupe. Usnavi and Sonny felt their anger drain away as the monstrous man towered over them, “Come along,”

“Mr. Adams, this man is with Rodriguez!” Usnavi exclaimed.

“Yes, he said Rodriguez was one of his professional contacts.” Adams said, not looking up from his computer. The One-Eyed man grabbed Usnavi and Sonny by the shoulders and ushered them out, both of them protesting the entire way.

* * *

 

What followed was a long trip home, which ended with the One-Eyed Man lifting both cousins into the air by the back of their shirts and carrying them inside like stray cats. Chip meekly followed, not wanting to be subjected to the same treatment; all animals know how painful it is to be carried by the scruff.

They were brought to the dining room where Rodriguez was waiting at the head of the table. He was clearly expecting them, as two other chairs were set at the other end of the table, with two bowls of oatmeal waiting; there was even a bowl on the ground for Chip.

“Have a nice morning trip?” Rodriguez asked, his eyes baring into them. “Please, have a seat, eat your breakfast, we have much to talk about.”

The One-Eyed Man stepped forward and roughly plopped the boys into their chairs, and Chip sat down by his bowl. The De la Vegas hesitated as they looked at the food in their bowls. They didn’t trust Rodriguez to give them food, but they were surprised to see that the oatmeal was sprinkled with powdered sugar and topped with raspberries.

Usnavi was the first to move, nominating himself to be the tester, slowly scooping a small amount of oatmeal and a raspberry into his mouth. Sonny and Chip braced themselves, but nothing of consequence took place; no poison, no broken glass, nothing. In fact, compared to the oatmeal they had here before, it was quite good. But then again, if you are deprived of good food, anything with the smallest amount of effort thrown into it tastes like a gourmet meal.

The De la Vegas began to eat and Rodriguez stood up, “Now, I just recently received a call from Mr. Adams, telling me that you came to see him.”

Chip snuffed, _‘If by recently you mean literally five minutes ago.’_

Usnavi and Sonny exchanged a look of fear as Rodriguez walked towards them, “He informed that you three are apparently having trouble adjusting to your new life here.”

“Did he?” Usnavi asked, keeping a straight face and steady voice. “I’m sorry he bothered you.”

“On the contrary,” Rodriguez said, sitting on the side of the table, “I’m glad he called; I want the three of you to feel at home here, now that I am your father.” Sonny sucked in a sharp breath and Usnavi quickly grabbed his wrist from under the chair, offering silent comfort.

“As you know, I have been working hard with my theater troupe and I’m afraid I may have come off as a bit…standoffish.” Rodriguez continued.

The use of such an inaccurate word made Chip snort, _‘How about pure evil?’_

“Therefore, to make you feel more at home, I’ve decided; I want you to participate in my next play.”

The De la Vegas blinked; that was certainly not the answer they had been expecting. “How would we participate?” Usnavi asked slowly.

“The play is called ‘The Binding Contract’.” Rodriguez explained, “It will be shown for one night only this Friday night, telling the tale of a very tall and handsome man, played by me, who is very poor, but gives everything he has for those who need help.”

Sonny inwardly rolled his eyes.

“And in the end, he inherits a large fortune, by signing a binding contract, allowing the family to give control of their money to him.”

Sonny frowned at the very specific terms of the play as Rodriguez looked at the little family, “Sonny and Chip will play two cheering audience members.”

“But we’re shorter than most adults.” Sonny pointed out.

“You’ll be playing two midgets.” Rodriguez said patiently.

“And what about me?” Usnavi asked, almost afraid of the answer.

“Ah Usnavi, my dear boy,” Rodriguez said happily, “You will be playing the key signatory of the contract, who signs the fortune over to me.” He leaned in close to Usnavi, “It’s a very important role, but very easy; you only have to say ‘I agree,’ and sign the contract that Miss Theodosia provides when she asks if you will sign; which by the way, will be an authentic one from City Hall for realistic measures.”

“Theodosia’s gonna be in this?” Usnavi asked.

“Of course; she is a judge.” Rodriguez said, as if it were obvious.

“But she’s just a judge understudy.” Sonny pointed out. “No offence to her, but she’s not really-”

“No matter!” Rodriguez cut him off. “She’s legally approved to participate in political matters!”

“But it’s a play, it’s not real.” Sonny said.

Rodriguez looked at him dangerously, “You really ought to learn to control that mouth of yours.” He said slowly. “Children are meant to be seen, and not heard.”

“Actually,” Usnavi quickly cut in. “I don’t think I’m talented enough to perform in something like this.” He smiled uneasily, “I’ve never really acted before so, I don’t think-”

He was cut off as Rodriguez slammed his fist onto the table, “You will participate in my theatrical performance!” He snapped. “I’d prefer you do it voluntarily, but as Mr. Adams said, I can order you, and you must obey!”

And with that, he exited, slamming the doors behind him. A second later, he poked his head back in, “And clean the kitchen!” He slammed the door again.

“Sheesh…” Sonny muttered. “Even for an actor, he’s the biggest drama queen I’ve ever seen.”

“Well…” Usnavi said uneasily. “I guess it couldn’t hurt to be in this play; I mean, what’s the worst that could happen?”

But Sonny shook his head, “He’s got to be up to something; what good is having us in this stupid play?”

“I don’t know.” Usnavi said, gathering their empty oatmeal bowls to wash.

Chip barked, _‘Ten bucks says he’s trying to get the fortune.’_

Sonny nodded, “Chip’s right; this is probably just part of his plan.”

“Well, what can we do?” Usnavi asked. They couldn’t ask Mr. Adams for help, he’d probably just call Rodriguez again about their visit, the traitor. Sonny briefly thought of Theodosia, but what was to stop her from telling Rodriguez as well; that man had eyes everywhere!

Sonny stood up, “I’m gonna go to Theodosia’s library,” He said. “She has tons of law books, there’s gotta be something.”

Usnavi nodded, “Alright; Chip and I will start on the kitchen here.” He gave Sonny a pointed look, “Don’t be too long.” He said, his voice full of concern. He didn’t want Rodriguez to hurt Sonny again.

Sonny nodded and hurried out the door. He found Theodosia sitting in her library, and she looked up when he entered, “Oh, hello Sonny!” She greeted. “Good to see you again!”

“You too.” Sonny returned. “Um, you wouldn’t happen to have any law books about binding contracts, would you?”

Theodosia blinked at the specific subject, “Oh, of course!” He got up and pulled a decent sized book out of the bookshelf. “You really want to read this heavy thing? My husband and I work in law, and even we hate reading these.”

Sonny hesitated, “Let’s just say, it’s important.” He said.

“Well, alright then.” Theodosia said, moving to exit the library, “Don’t work yourself too hard now; you’ll want to have energy for Count Rodriguez’s play.”

Sonny smiled uneasily, “You excited about that?”

Theodosia hesitated, “Well…somewhat.” She said. “Don’t tell anyone, but I have a terrible case of stage fright.”

Sonny nodded silently and Theodosia exited, leaving Sonny to his book. It took longer than Sonny thought to find what he was looking for; the book was so long and difficult that Sonny found himself reading the same sentence twice in many cases. But when he did find what he was looking for, it felt like someone sucked the air out of the room. “No…” He whispered, anger filling him, “That son a bi-”

“HEY!” Sonny leapt to his feet as the Hairy Man was standing in the doorway of the library. “What are you doing in here?!”

“Reading.” Sonny answered, holding the book behind his back.

“Well, stop it! We can’t have little brats like you getting any ideas!” The Hairy Man said. “Rodriguez sent me to bring you back to the house!”

Sonny nodded and moved towards the door, only for the Hairy Man to block his way, “Listen closely, little boy,” He hissed. “The only reason Rodriguez hasn’t ripped the three of you limb from limb yet, is because he hasn’t gotten your fortune.” He scratched his long nails along Sonny’s face, tracing his bruise, “But ask yourself this; what reason will he have to keep you alive when he has your money?”

He grinned, “I can assure you,” Sonny winced as he poked his bruise, “Being slapped around will be the least of your problems.” Sonny felt a chill run down his spine as his animal eyes bore into him; he couldn’t speak, he could stare back in horror, somehow still able to hold the book behind his back.

“Go!” The Hairy Man barked, pointing to the house.

Sonny flinched and ran past him, moving to hold the book to his chest, his heart beating against it. This was bad, this was really bad! He had to tell Usnavi! Sonny sprinted into the house and found Usnavi and Chip, still in the kitchen, scrubbing the pots, “Cuz! We have a problem!”

“What?” Usnavi asked, stopping what he was doing.

“Rodriguez isn’t doing this for a play,” Sonny said, hurrying over to him, “He’s doing this for real; he’s gonna make you actually sign over the fortune to him!”

Usnavi was taken aback, “But…it’s just a play, it’s not real!”

Sonny placed the book on the table and opened it to the page he was reading. “That whole thing about signing a fortune over by contract is real!” He pointed to a passage. “If both parties are in agreement, and a judiciary official presides over the signing among witnesses, binding contracts may dictate anything, from inheritance, to passage of financial funds to non-relatives, like Rodriguez. And we know the contract is gonna be the real deal too, he said so! Plus, Theodosia’s gonna preside over the damn thing!”

Usnavi’s eyes grew wide as realization struck like lightning. “Oh god…” He breathed.

“Yeah, and it gets better,” Sonny turned the page. “If the contract is used for passage of funds, and or objects, the beneficiary of the contract, if he is older in age, has the right to gain permanent custody over the granter.” Sonny looked up at him. “Basically, when you sign that contract, you’re signing an adoption paper, you're stuck with him; and when Rodriguez has the fortune, he won’t need us anymore.” The words of the Hairy Man echoed in his head.

 _‘Shit…’_ Chip whined, perfectly summing up their feelings towards the situation.

Usnavi nodded and took a shaky breath, “Then I won’t sign it,” He said, looking at Sonny. “I know he’s forcing us, but I won’t do it; I’ll take the fall for us.”

Sonny shook his head and closed the book, “I’m not letting you do that.”

Usnavi’s eyes widened, “You’re saying you want me to sign?!”

“No!” Sonny exclaimed, giving him a look. “Because I’m gonna read through more of this and find a loophole; everything has a loophole!”

Usnavi nodded and squeezed his shoulder, “Alright, you go read; Chip and I will finish up the chores.”

Sonny nodded and bolted out of the kitchen, holding the book close. He hurried into their room, shut the door and sat down on the bed, opening the book. He read for hours, pouring over page after page; he never read so closely in his life.

It was long and difficult work, but Sonny was determined to save his cousin, as his loyalty for him ran deeper than the ocean. But after a while, Sonny began to wonder if there really was a loophole, until…he saw it. Sonny’s eyes widened as he read the line slowly, taking in every word, as the answer became clear.

“Holy shit…” Sonny breathed as he reread the lines over and over to make sure it was right. This…this was it! There was really a way to get out of signing the contract! Unfortunately, he was unable to notice a familiar figure watching him from the tower, through a familiar spyglass, through one of the many holes in the roof, honing in on the words he was reading.

Sonny bookmarked the page, folding it, and closed the book. He hid it under the covers before exiting the room. Sonny hurried down the long hallways, plans whirling in his head. For once they were in luck; they had a way out of this situation! He just had to tell Usnavi so they could think of a plan, and this stupid play would be done for.

Sonny stopped suddenly as he heard a loud creaking noise from behind him. He slowly turned around, on alert; was Rodriguez coming after him?

“Hello?” Sonny called. He glanced suspiciously around the empty hallway. Was it one of Rodriguez’s troupe? “If one of you creeps pull anything, you’ll regret it!” Sonny called loudly. He waited, but there was no response. Maybe living in this house was just making him paranoid.

Sonny turned back around when the door next to him creaked open, making him pause; a move he would quickly come to regret.

In an instant, an arm snaked around his chest and a hand clapped over his mouth. Sonny barely could let out a muffled exclamation before he was yanked into a dark room and out of sight.

* * *

 

Usnavi trudged into their room, his arms sore from chopping wood. He never wanted to pick up an axe again as long as he lived. Usnavi just about flopped onto the bed, only to cringe as something hard and uncomfortable met his back, even more so than the mattress. Usnavi got up and felt under the covers, pulling out the law book.

Usnavi shook his head, “Sonny…” Where was that kid, anyway? He expected him to be here, reading. Usnavi’s eyes were then drawn to the page sticking out of the middle of the book. It was how Sonny marked pages, much to librarian’s a book lover’s dismay, as folding the page in such a way could damage it and the words.

Usnavi opened the book and smoothed out the page; Sonny always made the page he wanted to remember the one he bookmarked. Usnavi scanned the page, a curious frown on his face as one sentence in particular seemed to burn into his brain. “No way…”

 _‘Coffee!’_ Usnavi looked up at the familiar nickname as Chip entered the room. _‘We have a problem!’_

Usnavi frowned at the dog’s muffled speech, as he had something in his mouth; something that made Usnavi pale in fear.

It was Sonny’s hat.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I totally BS'd that whole contract thing. But hey, it's a about as believable as that whole marriage thing in the original.
> 
> And if you've seen the sneak peek on tumblr, you now what's coming next.


	5. 1.5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Usnavi finds out what happened to Sonny and is offered a deal he can't refuse.

It was safe to say Rodriguez had been expecting Usnavi, as he turned right around the minute Usnavi stormed into the room, Chip right behind him. “Usnavi!” He greeted, a little too happily. “What can I do for you?”

“Where is he?!” Usnavi demanded.

“Who?”

“Sonny!”

“Sonny?”

“My cousin!”

“What about your cousin?”

“He’s missing!” Usnavi yelled, holding out Sonny’s hat. “I know you had something to do with this; where is he?!”

 _‘Answer the question, or I’ll go for your nose!’_ Chip growled loudly.

“Oh dear!” Rodriguez exclaimed, putting a hand to his chest, “Little Sonny is missing? How dreadful!”

Chip’s growling grew louder, _‘Don’t mock us!’_

“Oh, wait!” Rodriguez put a hand to his ear, “I think I heard something outside!” It wasn’t much, but Usnavi was willing to take it. He turned and hurried out the door, Chip following.

They ran out to the backyard, “Sonny?!” Usnavi called, glancing around the desolate yard, “Sonny!”

 _‘Curly! You out here?’_ Chip barked loudly.

“You won’t find him here.” Usnavi turned as their guardian walked towards them. Rodriguez handed him a pair of binoculars and pointed towards the tower, “You might want to look up there.”

Usnavi frowned in confusion and put the binoculars to his face, following his finger. He was looking at the tower, but something was hanging from the window. Usnavi zoomed in, realizing that the object was a decent sized cage, like a birdcage in shape; but something was inside it.

Usnavi zoomed in closer and the color slowly drained from his face; it was Sonny.

The younger De la Vega was bound hand and foot, thick ropes wrapped tightly around his upper body, thighs, calves and ankles, nearly mummifying him. Duct tape was placed over his mouth, sealing his lips shut. The tape was wrapped around his head multiple times creating a thick silver belt that muted his cries almost completely.

The binoculars began to shake in Usnavi’s grasp as he watched Sonny move and squirm about in his bonds, looking desperately for a way to escape, fear in his eyes, but he was completely trapped.

Usnavi lowered the binoculars and faced Rodriguez sharply, “Let him go!” He yelled, his paternal instincts for his cousin shooting into overdrive while Chip barked madly.

“Gladly.” Rodriguez pulled out a small radio, “Let him go.” There was a loud clunk and the cage began to fall, Sonny’s muffled scream barely audible.

“No!” Usnavi yelled in horror.

“Hold it.” Rodriguez said into the radio, and the cage came to an abrupt halt. Usnavi looked through the binoculars again; Sonny seemed pretty shaken, but not hurt as the cage was raised back up to the window.

Usnavi’s jaw clenched as he made towards Rodriguez, “If you hurt him-”

“Ah ah ah,” Rodriguez said, holding up the radio, “I wouldn’t do anything rash if I were you; that tower is over fifty feet tall.”

“He’s done nothing to you!” Usnavi protested. “How could you do this?! He’s a child!”

“You think I care about that?” Rodriguez asked. “I’m much more interested to see just how hard he’ll hit the ground when he falls.”

“No!” Usnavi cried, his voice close to cracking from fear. “Please, stop, don’t hurt him! I’ll-I’ll do anything, _anything_ , just, please, don’t hurt him!” He hated that he had been reduced to begging, but he had no choice.

“Anything?” Rodriguez asked gleefully. “Anything, such as, signing over your life and fortune to me?”

Usnavi sucked in a sharp breath; that’s what this was all about?! This man, this…this maniac was willing to threaten his baby cousin just to get his hands on their fortune?!

“Think carefully, Orphan.” Rodriguez said, waving the radio tauntingly in front of Usnavi, “Your precious little boy’s life quite literally hangs in the balance.”

Usnavi grit his teeth and looked back up the cage; he could see it moving slightly from Sonny struggling. Poor Sonny was probably scared out of his mind! Usnavi lowered his head in defeat; they were helpless. There was nothing Usnavi could do to save Sonny, except do as he was told. They really had no choice.

“Fine.” Usnavi finally said, clenching his fists tightly, “I’ll do it.”

“Very good.” Rodriguez smiled cruelly, “He’ll remain up there until my play is over. But, any funny business, I give the word, and your little Son-shine will be setting for the last time.”

Usnavi glared at him, his eyes beginning to sting, and Rodriguez entered the house. Usnavi watched him go and looked back up at the cage as water dripped down his cheeks.

You might think those were tears, but they were in fact raindrops, as it had just started to fall. Weather can have the uncanny ability to mirror one’s emotions, and right now, Usnavi was feeling despair with the rain. However, with rain, there can be thunder, and Usnavi was not about to give up due to despair, as he put his hat firmly on his head. “Hold on, _mijo…”_

* * *

 

Usnavi hurried back to their room, Chip close behind. Chip tilted his head as Usnavi began examining the torn-up curtains in their room. As much as he loved his two humans, Chip couldn’t help but sometimes be stunned by how strangely they could act sometimes. _‘What are you doing?’_

“I’m not sure yet.” Usnavi answered, basically meaning that the gears in his head were starting to turn.

_‘What are we going to do?’_

“I don’t know.” Usnavi answered again.

Chip leapt onto their bed and lay down with a whine, _‘I’m scared.’_

Usnavi gave him a sad look, “Me too, buddy, me too.”

Night quickly fell and Usnavi managed to convince Chip to go to sleep, as the husky was adamant about sleeping when Sonny was trapped. Once Chip was asleep, Usnavi took the torn curtains and exited their room, hurrying down to the backyard. He inwardly grinned as he spied just the thing he needed: an umbrella with the fabric torn off.

Usnavi grabbed it and hurried to the tower, where Sonny’s cage was still safely hanging at the top. Usnavi knelt down and got to work, tearing up the curtains into long strips. Once they were torn, he tied them together, forming a long rope, exactly fifty feet long. Usnavi tied the rope to the end of the umbrella, making it just the right length; if you recall, Rodriguez said that the tower was over fifty feet tall.

Usnavi stood and held the umbrella in one hand, staring up at the tall tower. He took a deep breath and began spinning the umbrella in a circle, building momentum. After a few seconds, he released it, only to have the umbrella hit the wall and come crashing down.

Meanwhile, in the cage, Sonny, who had been slightly dozing off (a very difficult task when you're tied up with tape over your mouth), was jerked awake by the sounds beneath him.

Usnavi tried throwing the umbrella many more times, until finally, the umbrella reached the windowsill, latching onto it. Usnavi gave the curtain rope a few tugs, finding it stable, and began to climb. Physical strength had never been Usnavi’s strong suit; in fact, many would call him a wimp or something far worse.

But even the weakest humans can tap into something when the situation demands it, and that is adrenaline. With adrenaline, the human body’s equivalent to an enhancing drug, humans can pull off incredible feats. For example, a mother may lift a car to save her child trapped underneath, or a teenager may punch a bully into submission for threatening a friend or loved one.

And in Usnavi’s case, climbing the side of a tower with only a rope made of curtains, was made much easier than it should have been, seeing how his dear cousin’s life was in jeopardy. The climb was slow and careful, but at no point did Usnavi feel tired or the need to let go. Soon, the window of the tower was less than ten feet away. He was almost there; the cage was just about within arm’s distance.

“Sonny!” Usnavi called softly. “Sonny!”

Sonny peeked out of the cage and his eyes widened in shock and relief. He began to let out a string of muffled cries, struggling with a new energy.

Usnavi quickly shushed him and put a hand on the base of the cage to keep it still; he only had one shot at this, he couldn’t risk alerting anybody. “I’m coming, _mijo_.” He said. He climbed the rest of the way up and hoisted himself into the window, his limbs rejoicing at the solid ground beneath him. He turned back to Sonny, whose eyes were full of hope, pleading to be released.

“Is the key to the cage somewhere in here?” Usnavi asked.

Sonny nodded quickly, urging for him to hurry.

“Alright, just hold on a little longer,” Usnavi promised. “I’ll get you out of there.” Usnavi immediately began searching the small room; there had to be a key somewhere. Unfortunately, he was so busy looking that he didn’t notice the door opening until Sonny began to let out a muffled warning.

Usnavi was yanked to his feet by the back of his shirt, to be faced with the One-Eyed Man. “Glad you could join us.” The One-Eyed Man growled while muffled angry noises came from Sonny, most likely telling the large henchman to not touch his older cousin. “Have a seat.”

The large man practically flung Usnavi across the room, making him land in the only chair up there. Usnavi pressed his back against the chair as the One-Eyed Man hovered over him, pulling out his radio, that looked microscopic in his large hands. “Boss, it’s me.” He said into it. “The orphan just climbed up here to try and rescue the brat. He used some kind of rope.”

“Grappling hook…” Usnavi muttered under his breath.

“Yes, boss. I don’t know, boss. Yes, boss.” The man put the radio away. “Count Rodriguez is very displeased with his son.”

“I’m not his son.” Usnavi bit out.

“Keep telling yourself that.” The One-Eyed Man went towards the door. “You’re going to stay up here until the play, so you won’t get into anymore mischief. Your mutt will be joining you shortly.” He grabbed the key, which had been hidden under some discarded costumes and pocketed it. He exited the door, his hand on the doorknob.

“Remember, you made a deal; you sign the paper, or Sonny goes down.” The One-Eyed Man glared at him, “Don’t make him change his mind.” The door slammed shut before the lock clicked outside, making Usnavi slump in defeat. They were so close…

Usnavi heard a soft whimper and turned back to the cage. Sonny’s eyes were wide as he put together the meaning of the One-Eyed Man’s last statement, before he began to struggle madly, trying to use his anger to break free.

Usnavi could practically hear his cousin ranting through the tape about what Usnavi was being forced to do, and he hurried over as the cage began to rock dangerously. “Sonny! Sonny stop!” He cried, reaching out the window and stopping the cage.

Sonny looked at him, almost glaring, still trying to speak through the tape; he was mostly likely demanding what made Usnavi agree to such a deal.

Usnavi took a deep breath, “I’m sorry, Sonny but…I can’t let him hurt you.” He said.

Sonny let out a few muffled protests as Usnavi grasped the bars of the cage to keep it still. “I’m sorry, Sonny, but there’s nothing I can do.” He said, gently but firmly, “I wouldn’t be able to live with myself if I let something happen to you when I had the power to stop it.”

Sonny squeezed his eyes shut and shook his head, stomping his bound feet on the cage door with a loud bang. Desperate muffled pleas came through the gag as Sonny begged his cousin not to go through with this. He couldn’t live with _himself_ knowing that Usnavi had to throw his freedom away because of him!

Sonny’s eyes seemed close to glassing over and it broke Usnavi’s heart. “Oh Sonny…”

With the bars spaced enough to only allow his hands halfway through, Usnavi reached through as far as he could. Sonny slowly inched closer to him (which was very difficult to do while tied up without rocking the cage) and Usnavi stroked his curly hair with one set of fingers while the other rested on the side of Sonny’s face.

Usnavi felt anger boil as his fingers brushed Sonny’s gag, finally getting a feel for how thick it was. They must’ve wrapped nearly the whole roll of tape around the poor boy’s head, as Usnavi could feel far too many layers. If only the bars were farther apart, Usnavi would be satisfied by being able to at least untie him.

“Don’t worry, _mijo.”_ Usnavi murmured. “We’ll make it through this; I promise, I won’t let them hurt you.”

Sonny looked up at him, worry in his eyes as a questioning noise was made through his gag. ‘But what about you?’ He was asking.

Usnavi sent a sad smile his way, “It doesn’t matter, as long as you’re safe.” He said. “I promised Mamá and Papí that I would take care of you; let me keep my promise, _mijo.”_

Sonny let out a few more muffled whimpers as a few tears leaked out of his eyes. Usnavi rested his head on the bars and Sonny slumped in his bonds, leaning slightly into Usnavi’s touch.

Usnavi turned as the door opened again, and a very ruffled Chip was shoved inside, having just been woken up. _‘Wha…’_ He snorted as the door shut and locked again. _‘What’s going on?’_

Usnavi sighed, “I tried to save Sonny with a grappling hook.” He said. “You can tell how that went.”

‘I’m sorry it didn’t work.’ Chip whined.

“It worked fine.” Usnavi said. “I just got caught.”

Chip went up to the window and put his front paws on the windowsill, facing Sonny, _‘Don’t worry Curly, we’ll figure something out; just hang in there.’_

Sonny gave him a look and Chip shook his head, _‘Yeah, poor choice of words.’_ He looked at Usnavi and barked, _‘Is there anything in here you can use?’_

Usnavi glanced around the room, only seeing empty bottles and discarded, dirty costume pieces strewn about the room. His mind briefly touched Molotov cocktails, as he remembered from a movie he watched with Sonny once, but they didn’t have any kerosene or fire. “ _Lo siento_ ,” He said, taking off his hat in defeat. “I don’t think we can get out of this.”

 _‘But there’s always a way.’_ Chip barked.

Usnavi sighed and sank down under the window, “Not this time…”

Chip whimpered sadly and sat down next to Usnavi, while Sonny leaned against the bars of his cage. Hope was quickly draining out of the De la Vegas as the rest of the night and the next day wore on slowly.

They sat in utter silence until the One-Eyed Man finally opened the door, poking his massive head inside. “It’s time.”

Usnavi took a deep breath and stood up, while Chip and Sonny watched in sadness. Usnavi turned towards the cage, where Sonny looked up at him with still tearful eyes.

“Now.” The One-Eyed Man growled.

“Just a second.” Usnavi said, reaching his fingers through the thinly spaced bars. Sonny drew his gaze down as his older cousin lightly stroked his hair, “Don’t worry, you’ll be out of there soon.” He whispered.

Sonny shook his head and let out a few more muffled pleas, as a last attempt to talk his cousin off the ledge.

Usnavi took a deep shaky breath, tears coming to his eyes as well as he leaned his head against the bars, _“Te amo, mijo.”_

Sonny leaned his head against the bars as well, their foreheads barely touching through the bars, returning the sentiment. But the sentiment only lasted for a few precious seconds as Usnavi was suddenly yanked away by the One-Eyed Man. Sonny watched him go with wide, frightened eyes, letting out muffled cries.

Usnavi spared him one last look before he was hustled out of the room, and practically shoved towards the stairs as the One-Eyed Man locked the door behind them. Usnavi caught himself on the railing, keeping himself from toppling down the stairs with his left hand. Usnavi looked at it, and a thought began to tug at his brain. That thought continued to tug at him as he was escorted down the stairs, out of the tower, and into the car, where Rodriguez was waiting.

“Tonight’s the night!” Rodriguez announced, turning to Usnavi from his spot in the passenger seat. “My associate will remain here at the tower, and we will be in constant contact.” He said, holding up his radio. “If you don’t sign, your precious little baby cousin will be dropped to his death; am I clear?”

 _“Si.”_ Usnavi said softly. Rodriguez didn’t pay it any more mind and ordered the Tattooed Man to start driving. Usnavi watched the tower and the cage hanging from it get smaller as that thought from earlier slowly came to light, in the form of a particular page in a law book that Sonny had left in their room.


	6. 1.6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which the play goes on, and everything turns out alright for a change.

To make this long story a bit shorter, which is difficult, since minor details play a big role in a story such as this, the play was awful. Many would probably call it worse than awful; it was over three hours, the acting was terrible, the sets were basic, and the lighting had no variety.

Both Usnavi and Theodosia were thankful that their part wasn’t until the very end of the play; Theodosia, wearing her signature judge outfit, because of her stage fright, and Usnavi, wearing a tacky black suit that he had been forced into, because it meant he didn’t have to interact with these people any more than he had to.

But he couldn’t help but realize that it was strangely fitting; once this play was over, his life would be as well. He would be in the clutches of Rodriguez for the rest of his days, along with his family’s fortune. When it was time for him to go onstage, the only thing that made him walk forward was the tiny ray of hope that he would be able to get Sonny and Chip somewhere safer, better for Sonny to grow up and for Chip to run free.

Usnavi walked out to the stage where a large table was set up. The contract lay on before Rodriguez, with a pen lying next to it, while Theodosia took her place behind the table. “Do you agree to take ownership of the enormous fortune and financial responsibilities of this household?” Theodosia recited, in a very stiff, nervous voice.

“I agree.” Rodriguez answered easily, taking the pen and signing his name.

Theodosia turned to Usnavi, “Do you agree to turn over your entire fortune, as well as your own financial and physical well-being to this man?” Usnavi glanced at Rodriguez, who opened his jacket slightly, revealing the small radio in his inner pocket.

Usnavi swallowed and picked up the pen, “I…agree.” Usnavi said softly, and signed his name.

Theodosia took the contract and looked it over, “Then, by the power vested in me, I declare this contract complete.” The music began to play, making Usnavi feel sick to his stomach. _‘You did the right thing,’_ He kept telling himself. This was all for Sonny. Sonny was safe now.

The hard part was over, now he could focus on what really mattered as he faced Rodriguez. “Alright, now let him go.”

Rodriguez blinked, “What?”

“I did what you said, now let Sonny go!” Usnavi exclaimed. “You promised you wouldn’t hurt him!”

“What is he talking about?” Adams asked, standing abruptly, as he had been attending the show. “Where _is_ Sonny?”

Rodriguez shrugged, “He’s a bit tied up at the moment, if you’ll excuse my joke.”

Usnavi clenched his fists; he was a very non-violent person by nature, but he was dangerously close to switching sides. “We had a deal.” Usnavi said dangerously. “Let. Him. Go.”

Rodriguez let out a dramatic sigh, “Very well.” He pulled out his radio, not taking his eyes off Usnavi. He paused, before uttering two haunting words.

“Drop him.”

“NO!” Usnavi screamed as loud clunk of metal sounded from the device.

Rodriguez laughed and pocketed his radio while Usnavi felt like the room was spinning. This wasn’t happening, was it? Sonny was…dead? Usnavi felt his legs almost give out, forcing him to lean heavily on the table before him. He felt his whole body begin to shut down from shock and despair; his whole world was ending right before his eyes.

The audience murmured in confusion, most likely catching on that this was more than a play, and Rodriguez stepped forward, cutting off the band. “Ladies and gentlemen, I have an announcement; there is no need to continue with this play.” He said. “For you see, it’s purpose has been served. This has not been a work of fiction; this contract, that I have just signed with Usnavi De la Vega is perfectly legal, and I am now in control of his entire fortune.”

The audience gasped and Theodosia stepped forward, “That can’t be true!”

“On the contrary, Theo.” Rodriguez spat. “The law clearly states that the signatory must verbally agree and sign the document in their own hand, a document which is in fact, an official document and not just a stage prop.”

Theodosia looked over the contract again and slowly lowered it, horror dawning on her face, “I’m afraid…this contract is completely binding.” She said. “Usnavi verbally agreed and signed the document in his own hand.”

That phrase in particular finally resonated with Usnavi, as his gaze fell on his hands. He slowly stood up straight and faced Rodriguez, “Actually…I don’t think that’s entirely true.” He said.

Rodriguez raised an eyebrow, “And why not?”

“I didn’t sign the document in my own hand.” Usnavi answered. “I’m right-handed, and I signed it with my left hand.”

He looked at Theodosia who nodded, “He’s right; if he is indeed right-handed, and he signed it with his left, then he did not sign in his own hand.”

Rodriguez shrugged, “Like it makes any difference.”

Usnavi frowned, “What are you talking about?” Rodriguez gave him a look, “What did you think that one tiny detail would invalidate a legal document?” He barked out a laugh, “Of course not! In order to invalidate the contract, the signatory must not sign it in their own hand, but there must also be an objection from a direct relative.”

Usnavi felt his confidence fade, “No…” He rasped.

He looked at Theodosia for confirmation, and to his horror, she nodded slowly, “I’m sorry…”

“Now, if you would please wrap this up.” Rodriguez ordered. “Finish your lines so we can end this with a big finale.”

“If…” Theodosia swallowed, “If there are any objections, speak now or forever hold your peace.” She recited slowly.

Usnavi lowered his head as silence filled the theater; it was all over.

“Yeah, I object!”

Usnavi’s head shot up at the familiar voice, followed by a happy bark. Everyone turned to see Sonny hurrying down the aisle, Chip by his side.

 _‘This play is over!’_ Chip howled gleefully.

Usnavi stared at him, a disbelieving smile coming to his face, “Sonny!” He cried in relief, tears filling his eyes.

Sonny stopped a few feet from the stage, glaring at Rodriguez whose face had begun to turn red with rage, “As direct relative of Usnavi De la Vega, I object to this contract! My cousin isn’t signing anything over to anybody while I’m around!”

Theodosia smiled in pure relief and took action immediately, “Well then, seeing as that the signatory didn’t sign the document in his own hand, and a direct relative objected to the affair, this contract is hereby invalid.”

Cheers rose from the audience, covering up a particularly loud curse from Rodriguez. Usnavi leapt off the stage and just about barreled into his little cousin, crushing him a hug.

“Hey cuz.” Sonny said happily.

“Thank god, you’re okay!” He cried, kissing Sonny’s forehead. “I was so worried, I-I thought I’d lost you like Mama and Papí!” Chip pranced happily around them, tail wagging madly.

Usnavi eventually pulled away and looked Sonny over; there were only a few red marks on Sonny’s limbs from the rope and there was a slightly pale ring around his head where the tape had been, but other than that, he was fine. But then Usnavi took in the bags under his cousin’s eyes and remembered that he had been dangling in a cage for nearly twenty-four hours.

“You must be starving!” Usnavi exclaimed, starting to fuss over him. “You haven’t eaten for a whole day, and you couldn’t have slept up there either! Are you sure you’re okay? They didn’t hurt you, did they?”

“I’m fine.” Sonny said with a nod, “But yeah, I’m starving.”

Usnavi breathed out a laugh and hugged Sonny again.

“Sonny, where have you been?” Adams asked.

“Rodriguez tied him up and put him a cage to force me to go through with this.” Usnavi explained quickly, without releasing Sonny.

Theodosia gasped, “How insufferable!”

“Indeed!” Adams agreed.

Rodriguez growled and stepped off the stage towards them, “You may have wheedled your way out of my contract, but don’t forget, I am still your guardian.”

Sonny frowned, “Seriously?”

Usnavi held Sonny protectively with a glare at the man, and Chip stepped towards him with a growl, _‘Back it up, creep.’_

“Do you honestly think I will let you continue to care for these three after this treachery?” Adams demanded. “And as it just so happens, I just received word that the deceased De la Vegas actually designated another to be their guardian; I’m sure he will be a much more proper one than you.”

Usnavi and Sonny exchanged a shocked but relieved smile with each other.

“Speaking of which, Count Rodriguez-”

Suddenly, there was a click, and the lights went out, engulfing the theater in darkness. Usnavi immediately pulled Sonny closer and grabbed Chip’s collar, for fear of them being snatched away, when a voice whispered in his ear.

“Your family’s fortune will be mine, no matter what. And when I have it, I will kill you, your baby cousin, and your mangy mutt with my own two hands.”

A few seconds later, the lights clicked on again, “Not cool.” The stage hand who did the deed muttered. Usnavi stayed frozen in place, his eyes darting around for any sign of danger, but Rodriguez and his troupe had vanished without a trace.

“Uh, cuz?” Sonny’s strained voice piped up. “Do you think you could let me breathe please?”

 _‘I don’t think dogs are meant to be suspended like this.’_ Chip whined.

Usnavi looked down, finding that his arm was crushing Sonny to his chest by his neck while his hand holding Chip’s collar, lifting the husky’s front legs off the ground. “Oh, sorry.” Usnavi quickly released them.

“Rodriguez has escaped!” Adams exclaimed. “Someone call the police! The FBI! Somebody!” The audience all scrambled to find some trace of the sinister troupe and call the proper experts, and Adams approached the family of three, “Don’t worry; the authorities will be here soon; we’ll catch that scoundrel in no time!”

Usnavi silently nodded and pulled Sonny back to him in a hug. They stayed where they were until the theater quickly emptied.

Sonny eventually peeked up at him, still being hugged, “You gonna let me go?”

“No.”

“Okay.”

Normally, Sonny would strongly prefer not to be given open affection that his cousin so often gave to him. But in this case, after being tied up and locked in a cage for a day and two nights, Sonny decided he could afford to make an exception in this case.

“By the way, do you have my hat?” Sonny asked.

“It’s in my inner pocket.” Usnavi answered, still not letting go. He had kept it with him as a good luck charm.

“Kay; good.” Sonny said simply, Usnavi tightening his hold. “You okay, cuz?”

Usnavi took a shaky breath, “I thought you were dead, _mijo.”_ He whispered, finally pulling away to grasp his face, “I’m just…I can’t believe you’re here…how did you get out of there?”

Sonny smiled and scratched Chip behind the ears as they all sat down on one of the aisle steps, “It was a real challenge.”

Chip barked, _‘Yeah, a challenge that I pulled off.’_

“Shut up, fleabag!”

_‘C’mon, admit it; I saved your ass!’_

“Just let me tell the story!”

* * *

_(Merely one hour earlier)_

Chip lay on the floor, while the One-Eyed Man lounged in the chair. He glanced at Sonny every now and then, but the boy was completely nonresponsive. All the hope he had for escape and to save his cousin had drained out of him. There was nothing he could do.

But Chip, Chip was thinking. He wasn’t as smart as Usnavi and Sonny could be when the situation demanded it, but he understood situations; and this was a situation he knew was very bad. Dogs are smart beings, but they can’t think up plans as quickly as humans can.

Chip had to get his younger human out of that cage somehow. Usnavi had told him where the key was a while ago, but he couldn’t get it without being subdued by the One-Eyed Man. As he lay there, a plan slowly came to his mind; a plan that a dog could easily put in motion.

He slowly got up, stretched and began wandering around the room. He caught the One-Eyed Man’s attention as he slowly made his way to his chair, still sniffing around. “What are you doing?”

Chip circled around and slowly began to lift his leg, making the One-Eyed Man leap out of his seat. “No! Bad dog!” He scolded, catching Sonny’s attention at the noise. Chip put his leg back down and began to scratch at the door, whining sadly.

The One-Eyed Man rolled his eye, “Fine, make it quick.” He unlocked and opened the door and exited, Chip giving Sonny a glance before following. Once the One-Eyed Man began going down the stairs, Chip leapt from the top of the stairs and hit the One-Eyed Man’s back. The henchman stumbled, his huge body very clumsy on the rickety wooden staircase, and he tumbled down. He stopped moving after only a few steps, but his head was the first thing to hit the steps when he fell, knocking him out effectively.

 _‘Sucker!’_ Chip howled. He pulled the key out of the man’s pocket and went back into the room. Sonny’s eyes widened in amazement, letting out happy muffled cries, as Chip placed the key on the floor.

Chip then grabbed the wire holding the cage between his teeth and pulled the cage through the window so it was hovering over the floor before it dropped heavily to the ground. It was right then that Rodriguez's voice came through the radio, ordering Sonny to be dropped. If Sonny could smile through the tape, it would have been the biggest smile imaginable.

 _‘Alright, Curly,’_ Chip picked up the key, _‘I think it’s time for parole.’_ Chip stuck the key into the lock and turned it, the lock clicking open.

Sonny quickly moved towards the door and Chip grabbed a hold of the ropes to help pull him the rest of the way out of the cage. Chip then easily bit through the ropes around Sonny’s upper body, and the boy stretched his arms with a muffled sigh of relief.

Chip then worked on the ropes on his legs while Sonny scratched at the thick belt of tape around his mouth. Sonny had to find the end and unwrap the whole thing before yanking the final bit off and gasping for breath. Sonny took multiple deep breaths that he didn’t know he needed and licked his lips, his mouth dry and throat hoarse from attempting to scream.

Chip went up to him after biting off the ropes around his legs and began to lick Sonny’s face, which was basically just Chip saying _‘Are you okay?’_ over and over again.

Sonny coughed and swallowed, trying to wet his mouth all while moving his head away from his protective dog’s tongue. “Okay, okay Chip, I’m fine.” Sonny said softly, his voice a bit on the ragged side. “We need to get to that play before…” Sonny got up only to sway on his feet.

Chip appeared by his side, just in case the boy was about to collapse, _'You’re exhausted, Curly! You need to rest!’_

Sonny shook head, “Just need…some water.” He managed. Chip whined, but knew he couldn’t stop his younger human from continuing on his path. If one cousin was in danger, the other wouldn’t stop until he reached him.

Sonny stumbled down the stairs, finding a sink in the room at the base of the tower. Sonny ran over to it and turned the tap, cool water pouring from the faucet. Sonny spent a good few minutes swallowing handfuls of water, and splashing his face until he felt a bit more energized.

Now able to move without blurring vision, Sonny hurried to the door, “C’mon Chip, we’ve got a play to crash!”

 _‘But what can we possibly do?’_ Chip barked hurrying after him.

Sonny bit his lip as they ran down the sidewalk, “We’ll just have to wait and see.”

* * *

“It took us about an hour to get down here by train, but we got here just in time.” Sonny finished.

 _‘You’re welcome.’_ Chip barked.

Usnavi stared at them before deflating in relieved laughter and putting his arms around his family. “What would I do without you guys?”

Sonny smirked, “Skipping rocks by yourself?” Usnavi snorted and Sonny’s smile faded, “And…I had to make up for it somehow.”

Usnavi’s smile faded, “Make up for what?”

Sonny looked away, “I mean…all I really did was get myself caught like some damsel and just give Rodriguez ammunition.” He said.

Usnavi blinked and shook his head, “Sonny, that wasn’t your fault.”

“Yes, it was,” Sonny muttered. “I was trying to warn you about those loopholes, thinking that maybe something could go right in our lives for once, but no; those assholes just had to throw me in a cage to screw us over!”

Usnavi stared at him, “Sonny-”

“I thought I was gonna lose you, cuz!” Sonny finally cried. “You were gonna throw your life away for me, and it was gonna be all my fault! All because I let my guard down!” Sonny curled into himself. “I just…I never felt so…so…”

 _‘Helpless.’_ Chip supplied softly.

“Hey,” Usnavi said softly, fully facing him, “C’mere.” Usnavi pulled Sonny into a gentle hug. “You were the reason that Rodriguez failed.”

“Only because of luck.” Sonny mumbled into his shirt.

“No.” Usnavi said firmly. “Only because of you; because I read the page you bookmarked, from the book that you left in our room.” Sonny peeked up at him in soft surprise.

“If you hadn’t left that book behind, I never would’ve known to sign with my left hand.” Usnavi said. “You know me; I’m terrible at research. Only you could’ve found that loophole, and that’s why Rodriguez wanted to catch you; you made him panic.” Usnavi stroked his hair, “You got caught trying to warn me, and you still did even though you were locked in a cage; if it wasn’t for you, your objection would’ve meant nothing…Rodriguez would have won.”

Usnavi looked down at him and gave him a grateful smile. “You saved me, _mijo;_ getting caught was just an event that got in the way.”

Sonny smiled slightly, “I just hope it’s an event I never have to go through again.”

“Oh, trust me, no one is ever laying a hand on you again.” Usnavi said seriously, pulling him back into the hug. “I’ll keep you so close you’ll wish we got separated through adoption.”

Sonny laughed lightly, “Sounds good to me.”

“De la Vegas!” The three turned to see Mr. Adams coming towards them. “It’s time to go.”

A little while later (allowing Usnavi to change out of his costume) the family of three had piled into Mr. Adams’ car, “We’re going to drive through the night to get there; your luggage is in the trunk.” Adams said, starting up the car, “So make yourselves comfortable.”

And so, with Usnavi’s arm around Sonny, who quickly fell asleep against his shoulder, and Chip lying across both their laps, the car drove off into the night, the three passengers hoping that this series of unfortunate events were finally at an end.

But, I’m very sad to say, that their troubles were just beginning.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'll post the next chunk once I have the story for the second book written ;)


	7. 2.1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which the De la Vegas are taken to their new guardian.

Usnavi blinked awake as sunlight hit his face. He yawned and glanced around, seeing the inside of Mr. Adams’ car, with Sonny leaning on his shoulder and Chip on their laps. Usnavi then realized that his whole body ached from sleeping in such an awkward position. As I’m sure most of you know, sleeping in any kind of vehicle is very uncomfortable, no matter what position you take.

Usnavi’s movements made Chip open his eyes and lift his head. _‘Morning,’_ Chip yawned.

Usnavi gave him a pat, “Morning, buddy.”

Sonny then began to stir and Usnavi looked down at him as he opened his eyes. “Hey, sleepy-head,” Usnavi greeted.

“Hey cuz…” Sonny mumbled, rubbing the sleep out of his eyes.

“Sleep well?”

“Better than when I was stuck in that cage…”

Usnavi smiled sadly and rubbed his arm.

“Are the three of you awake back there?” Adams called.

“We are now.” Usnavi responded.

“Well, good, we’re almost to your new guardian.” Adams said.

“Who is our new guardian?” Sonny asked, sitting up straight.

“His name is Dr. John Laurens,” Adams answered.

Usnavi and Sonny frowned, “Never heard of him.” Sonny said.

“Well, he’s your closest living relative, and apparently should have been your guardian all along, according the De la Vega will.” Adams said. “You know, I’m starting to think it was a mistake to let that strange man into my office who claimed he was a consultant despite having no references or identification, and who suggested I place you in Count Rodriguez’s care.”

Sonny made a face of disbelief and exchanged a glance with Usnavi, who then looked at Adams warily.

“Thank goodness that got cleared up.” Usnavi said tightly.

 _‘You’re a disgrace to your profession.’_ Chip barked.

Indeed, it was thankful that the whole situation got cleared up. However, the De la Vegas couldn’t help but feel a touch of resentment towards Mr. Adams, who, by being so easily fooled, was basically responsible for all the disasters that occurred while living with Rodriguez, such as the multiple chores, domestic abuse, blackmail, and locking Sonny in a cage (Usnavi was particularly sore about that last one).

“Now, I know you may still be uneasy since Count Rodriguez is still on the loose,” Adams continued. “But the authorities have assured me that they will catch that terrible man very soon.”

Usnavi squeezed Sonny’s shoulder; the sooner he knew that Rodriguez was caught, the better he’d feel about their safety, particularly Sonny’s. But, I’m sorry to say, that the authorities wouldn’t catch Count Rodriguez, not for a long, long time.

The car turned onto Lousy Lane, and the inhabitants of the car immediately began coughing slightly and sniffing as a strong stench filled their nostrils. That’s because Lousy Lane was the most miserable lane in existence, passing a decaying orchard of the sourest apples and encircling a horseradish factory, giving the entire area the strongest, bitter smell imaginable.

Adams’ coughing began taking a turn for the worst, but luckily, they turned in to the driveway of their new home. The De la Vegas didn’t know what they were expecting, but it certainly wasn’t this.

The driveway was long, lined with multiple hedges and bushes that were shaped like snakes, turtles, and all other kinds of reptiles and amphibians. The driveway led to a very decent sized house. The entire area seemed clean and well kept, so it was already a step up from living with Rodriguez. But looks can be deceiving.

“How exactly is this John Laurens related to us?” Usnavi asked.

“Let’s see,” Adams said. “I believe he is your late father’s, cousin’s, wife’s brother. So, he’s an uncle of sorts, to both of you.”

“But why are we being sent to live with him?” Sonny asked. “ _Tia_ Luz and _Tio_ Luis never mentioned him.”

“Probably because they knew he was so busy.” Adams answered. “He is a doctor.”

 _‘But what kind of doctor?’_ Chip whined.

Chip was right to ask that question as there are many different kinds of doctors in the world. Each type of doctor sets up a certain scenario if you live with them. For example, if you live with a medical doctor you would most likely spend a lot of time hearing medical jargon and certain ways to stay healthy. But if you lived with a scientific kind of doctor who had a secret lab you were never allowed in to, it might be cause for suspicion.

The De la Vegas exited the car and Adams rang the doorbell, which sounded perfectly ordinary. The door opened a few moments later, revealing a man with freckles decorating his face. He had long curly hair tied up in the back and he had a bright smile on his face, “Well, look who it is!” He greeted, stepping outside. “You must be the De la Vegas!”

“Yes.” Adams nodded with a smile. “And you’re Dr. John Laurens?”

“That I am.” The man responded, before turning his attention back to the family, “Wow, look at you!” John exclaimed, “Usnavi, you were just a baby the last time I saw you; you look just like your dad!”

“Thank you…” Usnavi said sheepishly; he had never been given a compliment like that before.

“And Sonny, I’ve heard a lot about you,” John went on, “The little activist of the family who wants to bring equality to immigrants and other races, right?”

Sonny blinked, “Yeah, how did you know?”

“You have the eyes of a thinker, just like I did when I was your age.” John said. “You and I are gonna get along great!”

 _‘I hope so.’_ Chip snorted.

“Oh, and how could I forget Chip?” John knelt down and gave the dog a scratch behind the ears, “Guess Luz was right about you never leaving your owners behind if you made it this far.”

Chip wagged his tail, very happy about not being forgotten. He was part of the family too.

John invited them in and the De la Vegas were very pleased with what they saw. The foyer where they entered, was very wide with two staircases curving up to the second floor which was a small balcony.

John led them to the right where they came to a large living room, “Please, have a seat,” John offered, gesturing to the large couch and two armchairs that sat around a nice fireplace. The De la Vegas all took the couch and Adams took one of the armchairs.

“You know, you guys came just in time,” John said, walking into the kitchen that was right next to the living room, “because I just finished icing some homemade chocolate cake; anyone up for some?”

Usnavi and Sonny perked up, their eyes wide with shock and excitement, “Yes please.” They answered in unison.

John chuckled, “Mr. Adams, any for you?”

“No thank you,” Adams said, waving his hand, “I prefer not to eat on the job.”

“Suit yourself.”

John returned a few moments later with a tray carrying three plates of chocolate cake, and forks. He handed two plates to Usnavi and Sonny whose mouths quickly began to water at the sight of the treat. If they were a cartoon, their eyes would most likely have stars in them.

“And Chip,” John said, reaching into his pocket, “How would you like your namesake?”

Chip’s ears perked up as John pulled out a bag of chips. _‘Hell yeah!’_ Chip barked, his tail wagging.

John relented the chips with a grin, and the husky immediately ripped the bag open, somehow not spilling any crumbs while Sonny and Usnavi began to eat their cake, closing their eyes in contentment as they savored the flavor. It had been so long since they had chocolate cake, or even decent food for that matter.

“Yep, I had a feeling you’d be all over that.” John remarked. “Chocolate cake seems to be an all-time favorite for all the De la Vegas.”

Adams cleared his throat, “Well then, Dr. Laurens-”

“Please, none of that,” John said. “Call me John; I only use the doctor part at work or if it gets me a discount.” Sonny softly snorted, and John sent him a wink. “Call me John; Usnavi, Sonny, you can call me Uncle John if you want.”

“Anyway,” Adams continued, “I recall you mentioning that you may end up traveling at some point in time.”

“Oh, that!” John said. “I still not sure about that; I should get the answer in a few days.”

“Why would you need to travel?” Usnavi asked.

“Well, do you know what herpetology means?” John asked.

“The study of…reptiles?” Sonny tried, pulling out a very distant memory.

“Smart kid; I love it!” John said happily, “But yes, I study reptiles, amphibians, you name it! Mostly turtles though; they’re my favorite. I travel around the world and bring back undiscovered specimens.”

“Sounds exciting.” Usnavi commented.

“Oh, it is.” John agreed. “And don’t worry, I could use some assistants the next time I go.”

“We can come with you?” Sonny asked; he had always been eager to travel outside the country to see new things.

“Of course; I wouldn’t leave you out of something as big as an expedition!” John said.

Usnavi and Sonny smiled softly; so far things seemed to be good.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> John was too perfect for this role (...in more ways than one...)


	8. 2.2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which the De la Vegas learn a bit more about their Uncle John.

Adams discussed a few more things with John before he found that it was time to leave, and the family showed him out. Adams faced the three as they stood in the foyer. “Now De la Vegas, remember you can call me at any time if you need anything-”

“I’m pretty sure they won’t need anything from you.” John said, “They’re finally in my care where they belong and I plan to take care of them to the best of my ability.”

“The fortune can’t be used until Usnavi turns twenty-eight!” Sonny blurted out.

“Sonny!” Usnavi whispered, giving Sonny a small smack.

“What?”

“Well, despite that rude outburst, he is right.” Adams pointed out, but John shook his head.

“I don’t care about any fortune; work is pretty great so I really have no need for it.” John looked at Sonny, “But hey, I get where you’re coming from; I’d be suspicious too if I went through all that.”

“Ah, that unpleasantness with Count Rodriguez,” Adams said. “No need to remind them of such a terrible man.”

Although his words were a bit late, as Usnavi had already instinctively squeezed Sonny’s shoulder. But yes, the De la Vegas were still skeptical about their new guardian. They didn’t want any more to do with crazy schemes that involved losing their fortune.

“Anyway, I must be off.” Adams said heading for the door.

“ _Adios_ , Mr. Adams.” Usnavi said.

“Bye.” Sonny chimed in.

 _‘Good riddance.’_ Chip barked.

Adams turned to them once he was out the door, “Remember, you three can always stop by the bank if you-”

Adams was cut off as John shut the door. The De la Vegas couldn’t help but feel a strange sense of déjà vu as they were left alone with the stranger who was now their guardian; now only time would tell if they would be better off here.

John sighed and faced the De la Vegas, “I know that was probably rude, but, guys like that just really get me. I mean c’mon,” He gestured to Sonny, “Rodriguez ties you up and sticks you in a cage as a hostage, and he calls that whole thing ‘unpleasant’? Not to mention that he’s basically the reason you ended up with that asshole in the first place.”

 _‘Tell me about it.’_ Chip snorted.

“But hey, that’s all over now.” John said, smiling kindly. “I promise, nothing will hurt you here, just like your parents wanted.”

“About that,” Usnavi said. “Mama and Papi never mentioned you.”

“Really?” John asked, genuinely surprised.

“Really.” Sonny nodded.

“Huh, weird.” John remarked. “Luz, Luis and I were pretty close back in the day.”

“You were?” Usnavi asked.

“Yeah!” John said, “C’mon, I’ll show you.” He led them up the stairs, “We may be really distant on the family tree, but your parents and I knew each other almost our entire lives.” John explained. “See, here’s a picture of us!” He gestured to a framed photo of a grand piano.

“There’s no one in that picture.” Sonny pointed out.

“I know; we’re locked inside the piano.” John chuckled, shaking his head, “Good times…”

Usnavi and Sonny blinked at the bizarre answer, but decided to leave it at that.

“Oh, that reminds me!” John said, “There’s something else I want to show you.” John led them down the stairs and into the hallway that led under the balcony, “I’m about to show you one of the most important scientific collections in the history of the world.”

They walked towards a large metal door, covered with all sorts of knobs, gears, and other technological gadgets. “This door has top notch security, as you can see,” John said, a bit of humor in his voice as he pressed a button, making the gears whir to life, “It has nineteen locks, three combinations, two fingerprints, and one retinal scan.”

“Isn’t that overkill?” Sonny asked.

“Not when the best scientists in the world would jump into a pool of Snapping Turtles just to get a peek of what’s in here.” John answered. “Besides, all this stuff is just for intimidation; only the ones I trust the most know how to get in easily.” And he reached up and simply turned the doorknob.

“That’s it?” Usnavi asked.

“That’s it!” John repeated happily, and he opened the door, “De la Vegas, welcome to the Reptile Room.”

Light immediately shone upon them from the glass ceiling and windows, as the little family was faced with a large room that seemed to be part lab and part zoo. There were a few large tables spread out in the corners of the room, covered with vast scientific equipment, and a small living area occupied the middle of the room.

But the rest was comprised of numerous cages and tanks, full of all kinds of reptiles. The few potted trees dotting the room made the whole place feel like an indoor rainforest. “Let me give you the grand tour.” John said, grasping their shoulders and leading them through the room.

“Check this out!” He walked over to one of the trees, where a green lizard with wings was perched. “This is a Winged Lizard,” John said, letting the creature crawl onto his arm. “You’re lucky I was able to find him this time; he’s such a coward he uses camouflage a lot.”

“Cool…” Sonny breathed, gently petting its back with his finger.

“Can it fly?” Usnavi asked.

“He can fly on cue.” John said with a grin. “Fly!” He jerked his arm and the lizard took flight, looping around the room before landing on the tree again.

“Is that a two-headed turtle?” Sonny asked, pointing to a tank.

“Sure is!” John said.

“Is it a boy or a girl?” Usnavi asked.

John shrugged, “I dunno; didn’t think it polite to ask.” He pointed to another tank, full of decent sized turtles, “These are Clapping Turtles, distant relatives of Snapping Turtles,” He explained.

“Do they bite?” Usnavi asked.

“Yeah, but it doesn’t hurt; it just sounds like a clap.” John said. “Look.” He stuck his finger in the tank and one of the turtles bit his finger. But John didn’t even flinch, and as the turtle chewed on his finger, it’s jaw sounded like soft clapping.

John took his finger away and led them to a large cage that was covered with a cloth. “And this, is my most recent discovery.” John lay a hand on the large covered cage. “In a few weeks, I plan to present him to the Herpetological Society as my greatest discovery.”

In one swift movement, John removed the cloth, revealing a large black snake sitting in the cage. It was nearly fifteen feet long, and its black scales glistened in the light.

Usnavi couldn’t help but pull Sonny back slightly, as the creature hissed loudly. “What is it?” He asked.

John smirked, “The Incredibly Deadly Viper.” They stared at the snake, and Chip took a step closer to sniff it. It was then that they realized that the lock on the cage door was undone.

A loud hiss, and a split second later, the viper burst out of the cage towards the husky.

Usnavi and Sonny both screamed and jumped back, Usnavi pulling Sonny into a protective embrace. “Chip!” Sonny cried in horror.

“Oh god!” Usnavi looked on in horror as the large snake wrapped itself around their beloved dog’s body multiple times. “Do something!” Usnavi cried, looking to John for help, only to find that he was laughing, quite hard.

“What are you doing?!” Sonny demanded. “That-that thing is gonna eat our dog!”

“How can you be laughing at this?!” Usnavi yelled. “Help him!”

“Get it off him!” Sonny yelled.

However, they soon realized, that Chip wasn’t being harmed. In fact, the husky was sitting contentedly on the ground. Chip sniffed the viper’s head, who responded by flicking its tongue at Chip’s nose.

John finally calmed down, wiping a tear away, “Oh god… I’m sorry!” He laughed. “Your faces…they were priceless!” Usnavi and Sonny were dumbfounded as John stooped down and easily unwrapped the viper from around Chip. “You have nothing to worry about; the Incredibly Deadly Viper is the friendliest and least-harmful creature in the entire animal kingdom!”

Once the creature was off Chip, Sonny darted forward and pulled Chip back from the cage, kneeling and wrapping his arms around his neck. “Don’t worry,” John said, “I promise, this thing is like a big scaly teddy bear; it won’t hurt you.”

“But…” Usnavi stammered, “But it’s called the Incredibly Deadly Viper!”

“I know,” John said, closing the cage once the snake was safely inside, “I discovered him, so I got to name him; it’s a misnomer.”

“Why would you give your own discovery the wrong name?” Sonny asked, still a bit shaken from the fright.

John rubbed his hands together, “Because I’m gonna play a little joke on those stuck-up punks at the Herpetological Society.” He said mischievously. “I’m gonna present him as the Incredibly Deadly Viper, and then pretend that it’s escaped; those guys are gonna freak and it’s gonna be glorious!”

Sonny couldn’t help but snort; he could appreciate a good prank, even when he was the victim, “Think you could try to record it?”

“Oh, I plan to.” John said gleefully. “I promised Alex I’d get video evidence.”

“Alex?”

“A good friend of mine; you’ll probably meet him soon.”

“Are there any snakes in here that actually are dangerous?” Usnavi asked, changing the subject.

“Of course, there are!” John said. “You can’t study reptiles without learning about the poisonous ones; hell, I have a whole cabinet full of venom samples, ranging from slightly irritating to ‘dead before you hit the ground’.”

“Where are they?” Usnavi asked uneasily.

John waved his hand, “Oh relax, they’re under even heavier lock and key; I wouldn’t survive long if I didn’t know how to keep deadly creatures contained.” He said. “And that leads us to the core of the operation.” He led the De la Vegas to a small office area that sat on the other side of the room, across from the entrance.

“This, is my library, the gold mine where I keep all the greatest secrets of the reptile and amphibian world.” He smiled, “And I’m sure the three of you are smart enough to find them.”

“So, we can read all these?” Sonny asked.

“I insist!” John confirmed. He then sighed, “You know, I’ve always wanted a family of my own, someone to introduce to the world I’ve been studying.” He smiled and grasped Usnavi and Sonny’s shoulders.

“Now, I know that a few dangerous reptiles can make you doubt the entire species.” John reached out towards one of the shelves where a small Milk Snake slithered onto his arm, and he held it towards the two cousins. “But I promise, if you give them a chance, and learn how to tell the dangerous ones from the good ones, no harm will come to you in the Reptile Room.”

The snake lifted its head closer to Sonny’s face and flickered its tongue, tickling the tip of Sonny’s nose. Sonny chuckled and slowly took the snake, allowing the tiny creature to slither up his arm and find a suitable perch across his shoulders.

Usnavi felt a tug on his shoe and looked down to see a small turtle biting his shoelaces. John nodded and Usnavi slowly picked the tiny creature up, letting its tiny nails scrape his palm.

Of course, John was right; no harm would come to _them_ in the Reptile Room. But, unfortunately, harm would indeed come to their Uncle John.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ah, the good old calm before the storm...


	9. 2.3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which the De la Vegas receive an unexpected and very unwelcome visitor.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alright, time for things to go to shit...again.

The next week was probably better than anything the De la Vegas could’ve hoped for. John was a wonderful guardian, always so upbeat and pleasant. He treated the De la Vegas like they were actually a part of his direct family, instead of orphans or servants. They ate together, talked together, and they sometimes ever helped John conduct experiments.

Of course, they had to do a couple chores here and there, but they were ordinary, and actually quite fun if it involved something in the Reptile Room, such as polishing a tortoise’s shell or brushing the scales of a snake. In fact, the De la Vegas found themselves spending more and more time in the Reptile Room as the days wore on.

Interacting with the snakes, turtles, frogs, and even harmless crocodiles became a very fun past time. Chip almost always let the Incredibly Deadly Viper out of its cage so they could play and bite things together; the husky had never seemed so happy before.

But, I’m very sorry to say, that these wonderful times were about to quickly draw to a close.

On that fateful day, the De la Vegas were in the Reptile Room again. Usnavi was in the corner, feeding a banana to a large tortoise; the large creature seemed to enjoy the treat immensely. Sonny lay on the couch in the room, a large Emerald Boa lying on top of his stomach and chest as he casually flipped the strange cylinder in his hands.

The Boa hissed and flicked its tongue against Sonny’s chin before raising its head to look at the cylinder, “No, this is mine.” Sonny said, reaching towards the table where a bowl of raw meat was placed, Chip lightly dozing underneath. He grabbed a piece and fed it to the Boa; having the Boa out of the cage meant constantly feeding the large thing so it wouldn’t get into mischief.

After a while, he grabbed a small notebook off the table and looked at the snake, “Alright, up you get.” The snake hissed in protest as Sonny hauled him off him and placed him on the couch, where he sat next to him. He fed the Boa another piece of meat and began scribbling the numbers and letters down on the cylinder; there had to be a pattern somewhere.

“Still messing with that thing?” Sonny looked up as Usnavi leaned over the back of the couch, a decent sized Screeching Iguana latched on his back.

“Never really got a chance to earlier,” Sonny shrugged. “what with doing impossible chores, and being locked in a cage, and all.”

Usnavi winced at the memory and looked at Sonny’s notebook, “Well, have you found anything?”

“It’s gotta be some kind of decoder, with all the numbers and letters.” Sonny said. He opened the lid and peered inside, “And…I actually think it was some kind of telescope.”

Usnavi took it and peered through, finding glass inside, “What would Mama and Papi need with this?”

Sonny took it back, “They were your parents, you never saw it?”

“Never.” Usnavi shook his head.

The Boa reached towards the cylinder again and Sonny pulled it away, “Alright, that’s it, back in your cage.”

Sonny gathered up the large boa and deposited it back into its home just as John entered the room, “There you guys are,” He said.

“Hey Uncle John.” Sonny said.

“Keeping busy?” John asked.

“You could say that.” Sonny said, placing the bowl of meat into the boa’s cage.

The Screeching Iguana dropped from Usnavi’s back and John stepped forward to pick it up; he was immensely proud of how quickly the De la Vegas had taken to his reptile family. “I just wanted to let you know that I’ll be going into town for a bit.”

“What for?” Usnavi asked.

John shrugged, “Just to stock up on things; canned peaches, wasp repellent, canoes, and the like.” Usnavi and Sonny gave him a look.

“What, you never know when you might need them! I like to keep them in stock.” John said, putting the iguana down. “And while you’re at it, you think you could try luring the Androgynous Cobra out from under my bed? Damn thing’s gonna bite my feet off one day.”

Chip barked, _‘I’m on it.’_

“Chip said he’s on it.” Usnavi translated.

“Any word about that expedition?” Sonny asked. “Nothing yet,” John said. “But I was dropped a hint that my answer may be coming tonight; we’ll just have to wait and see.” Usnavi glanced at Sonny, his eyes falling on the strange cylinder. Sonny looked up at him, and Usnavi subtly gestured to John, glancing at the cylinder.

“Well, I’m off,” John said. “I should be back in thirty minutes, tops!”

_‘See ya.’_ Chip barked, and John exited the Reptile Room.

Usnavi looked at Sonny, “You should ask him.”

Sonny blinked, “About what?”

“About that thing,” Usnavi gestured to the cylinder. “Uncle John knew Mama and Papí, so maybe they told him about it.”

Sonny shrugged, “I guess…” He leaned back on the couch, putting the cylinder back into his pocket.

Usnavi frowned and stepped around the couch, sitting on the edge by his legs, “Something wrong, _mijo_?”

Sonny crossed his arms, staring at the ceiling, “I just don’t want to give it to him yet.”

“Why not?” Usnavi asked.

“I just don’t.” Sonny repeated tightly, “I mean, I want to, but…” He groaned and pressed the heels of his hands to his eyes.

“Sonny,” Usnavi prodded gently, “What’s this about?”

Sonny sighed and pulled his arms away, “I just…don’t trust Uncle John yet.”

“Why not?” Usnavi asked, almost in shock, “He’s been nothing but kind to us.”

“So far,” Sonny added. “You never know; something might happen and…I just want to be ready.”

Chip whined, _‘Can you really blame him?’_

Usnavi glanced at Chip and nodded in understanding. He reached out and rubbed Sonny’s shoulder, “I get that…what happened before has made you suspicious,” He said. “Trust me, I’m not completely comfortable yet either. But so far, all our first impressions have been wrong, so we shouldn’t jump to conclusions.”

“I know,” Sonny muttered, “But even so…”

“What?” Usnavi prompted.

Sonny sat up, “I gotta show you something.” The two cousins got up and Sonny reached between some books on the bookshelf, “I found this a few days ago,” He pulled out a long roll of paper and brought it to one of the tables. “You know that big hedge maze in the backyard?”

“Yeah.”

“Well, I found out what it looks like.” Sonny unrolled the paper, revealing some blueprints of the hedge maze, seeing that they formed a picture. But not just any picture…

“That…looks like Rodriguez’s tattoo.” Usnavi said slowly.

Sonny nodded, “Why would Uncle John have the exact same design?”

Usnavi shook his head, “It has to be a coincidence.”

“But what if it’s not?” Sonny urged.

“If Uncle John was with Rodriguez don’t you think he would have turned us over to him?” Usnavi pointed out.

“True,” Sonny nodded, “Unless he wants the fortune for himself.”

Usnavi snorted, “Okay, you’re letting your imagination go crazy again, _mijo_ ,” He said. “Remember, Uncle John doesn’t care about our fortune; he has plenty of money already.”

Sonny sighed, “Even so…”

“Sonny, Uncle John’s not a bad person.” Usnavi said seriously. “I’m sure we would’ve noticed if something was wrong.”

“Then why have we never heard of him?” Sonny asked. “I mean, I get why _Tia_ Luz and _Tio_ Luis never told us about Rodriguez, but why not Uncle John?”

Usnavi had to admit, Sonny had a point; Uncle John was such a nice guy, so why had they never heard of him? “Uncle John seemed pretty surprised about that too.” Usnavi agreed, before shaking his head, “What were Mama and Papi hiding?”

Sonny nodded, “First the cylinder, then it turns out we have all this money, then all these relatives we never heard about…I’m so confused!”

“I thought they’d never keep secrets from me.” Usnavi said. “They always acted normal until…until the fire happened.”

Sonny looked at him, “Do you think that was the reason they sent us out of the barrio?” He asked. “Because they knew about the fire?”

Usnavi sighed, “I have no idea…” Even more questions with no answers.

They were snapped out of their thoughts when the doorbell rang. The two cousins glanced at each other; Uncle John didn’t say he was expecting anybody… The family of three walked down the hallway and opened the door.

Looking back, the De la Vegas wished they had never opened that door. But they did, and a tall figure was waiting for them. He wore a lab coat, wore large glasses, and had a long beard with no hair. But it was his face that made the De la Vegas pale in horror; the face was unmistakable.

It was Count Rodriguez.

* * *

“Good morning!” Rodriguez greeted in a heavily accented voice. “My name is Stephano, I’m Dr. John Laurens' new assistant.”

“Rodriguez.” Sonny could only say, his voice soft from the shock.

_‘And its afternoon.’_ Chip growled.

Rodriguez frowned, “Rodriguez? I don’t know anyone by that name.” He said. “This is a very smelly area; perhaps the fumes from the road are bothering you?”

“You’re Rodriguez.” Usnavi said tightly, “If anyone deserved to travel down Lousy Lane, it’s you!”

“Please, would you help me bring in my luggage?” Rodriguez asked. “I am very tired from that long drive.”

But Usnavi shook his head, not taking his eyes off the man, “We’re not letting you in.” He quickly made to slam the door, but it was stopped by a decent sized dagger piercing the fine wood of the door. The two cousins jumped back and Rodriguez pushed the door back open with the dagger, stepping inside.

Usnavi immediately pushed Sonny behind him, placing himself firmly between Rodriguez and his cousin. One notable thing I failed to mention about Usnavi is that he always keeps his word. When he said that no one would ever lay a hand on Sonny again, he was prepared and willing to do whatever it took to make sure that statement stayed true, even the foolish act of protecting him against a person wielding a knife with no weapon himself.

The three began to back away towards the stairs, Rodriguez following, “Well, I see you all haven’t changed a bit.” He said tightly. “Usnavi, you’re still as wimpy as ever; Chip, you’re still as ugly as ever,”

_‘Excuse you!’_ Chip snarled.

“And Sonny, dear little Sonny; still a pipsqueak and still has only one foot instead of two.”

“Oh, hell no…” Sonny muttered, tightening his grip on Usnavi’s arm from behind him as they reached the top of the stairs.

“Ah yes, I remember that accident like it was yesterday,” Rodriguez continued. “A man named Stephano was so startled at being called Count Rodriguez, that he dropped his knife and it fell on one of Sonny’s little feet, completely severing it from his body.”

“Over my dead body!” Usnavi growled, while Chip barked dangerously.

“That can easily be arranged,” Rodriguez said with a grin. “After I have your fortune in my grasp.” They stopped walking, the dagger glinting in the light. “You two take after Luz and Luis; they were very brave in their day.” He pointed at the picture of the piano with his dagger. “It’s such a shame they had to leave so soon.”

“You know that’s not them in the picture, right?” Sonny piped up.

“Yes, it is,” Rodriguez said, “They’re inside the piano!”

“How do you know that?” Usnavi asked.

“I took the picture!” Rodriguez started to approach them again, “Now, all that’s left is there enormous fortune, which will soon be mine.”

“Never.” Usnavi said lowly.

“Never is a very long time,” Rodriguez said. “But it will be a few seconds before-”

Rodriguez was cut off as Chip darted forward and sunk his teeth into the man’s right leg. If there was one thing Chip knew very well, it was that humans talk too much, and that was always the ideal time to strike.

“Go, go!” Usnavi urged, pushing Sonny towards the stairs behind them towards the Reptile Room. The two cousins ran down the stairs, while Rodriguez toppled to the ground from the pain. Unfortunately, the strange cylinder fell out of Sonny’s pocket and landed on the stairs. 

“Chip!” Sonny called, once they entered the room. Chip released the man’s leg and scurried down the stairs, grabbing the cylinder in his mouth, Rodriguez in hot pursuit. Chip ran down the hallway, where Usnavi and Sonny were waiting inside the open door of the Reptile Room.

Rodriguez threw the knife, Chip slipped inside, and Usnavi slammed the door shut, just in time for the dagger to harmlessly hit the thick door. The De la Vegas slowly backed away as Rodriguez pounded on the door. The family wasn’t sure if they were relieved that Rodriguez thought the door had all those security measures, or terrified that there was nothing keeping the madman from opening the door and cornering them.

Chip handed Sonny the cylinder, “Good boy,” Sonny said, before looking back at the door, “How the hell did he find us?”

“The better question is, what do we do?” Usnavi responded.

“Uh…” Sonny glanced around the room, “We could break out the window and run for the train station.”

“And where would we go?” Usnavi asked.

“I don’t know; anywhere but here!” Sonny exclaimed.

Usnavi shook his head, “If Rodriguez could find us here, he can do it again.”

“We can’t just sit here and wait for him to kill us!” Sonny protested.

“He won’t kill us,” Usnavi said. “Not until he has our fortune.”

“Then what do we do?” Sonny asked desperately.

“I…” Usnavi took a deep breath, “I don’t know…”

Just then, the sound of a horn could be heard outside. Rodriguez abruptly stopped hitting the door and his footsteps got farther away. The De la Vegas ran to the window where they saw John step out of his truck.

“Uncle John will know what to do.” Usnavi reassured. “He’ll see right through that disguise.”

“I hope so…” Sonny muttered. Despite the disguise being paper thin, Rodriguez had to have some kind of plan. He was dumb, but he wasn’t completely incompetent. Rodriguez met John by his truck, and the De la Vegas all watched as they spoke. Unfortunately, John and Rodriguez eventually traveled inside the house, Rodriguez carrying two suitcases, one quite small, and the other quite large; god only knew what was in there.

“Usnavi? Sonny? Chip?”

The De la Vegas perked up at the familiar voice and rushed to the door. “Is that you, Uncle John?” Sonny called.

“Yes!” John responded, rather loudly, “Let me just unlock these incredibly advanced security measures and I’ll join you in a minute!” Usnavi and Sonny frowned as John began making a number of fake machine noises. Was he pretending to unlock all the security measures on the door?

A few moments later, the door opened, and John entered leaving the door halfway open. “Hey guys, sorry you were, uh, surprised by that guy.” He said loudly, glancing back through the door every now and then. “It makes sense, since he apparently chased you up and down the stairs with a knife.” He sent them a wink and the De la Vegas felt immense relief; John knew.

“Don’t worry, he’s just my new assistant like he said,” John went on, “Everything totally checks out.” He made a face and subtly shook his head. He then looked at them expectantly, and they flinched; he wanted them to play along!

“Oh, of course!” Usnavi said, in the same loud forced voice as John.

“Yeah,” Sonny agreed, John urging him to keep going, “How silly of us to be scared.”

“Yeah, anyway,” John said, glancing behind him again. “He explained that he has a strict fitness regimen which apparently involves running up and down the stairs while holding a knife.” John frowned and made a coo-coo gesture as he said that sentence, “Makes perfect sense, don’t you think?”

“Yeah, perfect sense.” Sonny agreed with a grimace. That detail was really pushing it.

“Maybe I’ll join him on one of those exercises.” Usnavi added.

John covered his mouth to hide a snort, “Good one.” He mouthed before clearing his throat. “Now, in the meantime, would you help me bring things in from my truck?” He asked, jerking his head towards the front door.

“Sure, Uncle John.” Sonny responded, and the four of them hurried outside.

“Help me get this canoe down,” John said, gesturing to the large canoe strapped to the top of his truck. John grabbed the front while Usnavi and Sonny grabbed the back; once it was off, John lowered the canoe so their heads were hidden.

“Sorry guys,” John said softly. “I had no idea they would catch up to us so quickly; I can’t turn my back for a second anymore.”

Usnavi and Sonny glanced at each other in relief, “So you recognized him?” Usnavi asked.

“Of course I did, I’m not an idiot.” John said. “I can’t believe he expected us to fall for something like that!”

“So, what are we gonna do?” Sonny asked. “Call the police?”

John frowned, “No way; if we call them now, ‘Stephano’ will either escape, or try to take us by force, or maybe both.” John’s eyes narrowed, “And we all know that this guy doesn’t work alone.”

Sonny and Usnavi nodded; John was right. If Rodriguez could slip away so easily before he could easily do it again, especially with the help of his troupe.

“For now, we just have to keep an eye on him.” John went on. “He’ll join us for dinner, and then I’ll invite him out.”

“For what?” Usnavi asked.

“I’m supposed to receive my tip about my trip tonight,” John answered. “Once I’ve got him out alone, I’ll take care of him.”

“But you’ll be alone, too!” Sonny protested.

Usnavi nodded, “He’s too dangerous!”

Chip snuffed, _‘He’s smarter than he looks!’_

“I’m your guardian, it’s my job to keep you safe,” John said seriously. “And that means taking care of creepy guys who are only after your fortune.” They put the canoe down and began to carry it towards the door, “Besides-”

**CRASH!**

A lamp shattered right on John’s head, sending him to the ground. The two cousins dropped the canoe and rushed to his side.

“Uncle John!” Sonny exclaimed.

“Uncle John, are you alright?!” Usnavi exclaimed.

Chip began to lick his face, _‘Don’t go into the light!’_

“I’m fine…” John grunted, gently pushing Chip’s face away. Usnavi and Sonny helped him sit up, as he held his head.

“So sorry!” They looked up to see Rodriguez looking out the window above them. “My arm must’ve hit that lamp by accident.”

John waved, “Don’t worry, no harm done!” Rodriguez closed the window and John rolled his eyes, “Has he always pulled bullshit like that?”

“Oh yeah,” Sonny nodded as he and Usnavi helped John to his feet, “The worst part is that most people believe it.”

“He basically made his slaves and said he was being ‘standoffish’.” Usnavi added.

John brushed the glass shards off him, “You guys are amazing for putting up with him for so long.”

“Are you sure we shouldn’t just call the police?” Usnavi asked.

John shook his head, “Don’t worry, I know what I’m doing.”

The De la Vegas shared an uneasy look and followed John inside. They really hoped their Uncle John really knew what he was doing.


	10. 2.4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which John confronts Rodriguez and seemingly takes care of him, after receiving an urgent message.

The rest of the day was so tense, the De la Vegas could hardly breathe. Even though John managed to distract Rodriguez with forcing him to play the role of ‘Stephano the lab assistant’, it didn’t help much. The home that they were just starting to think was safe, was no longer safe whatsoever.

Dinner was the worst, as the De la Vegas tried to eat their food without making any kind of contact with Rodriguez. After a while, John cleared his throat, “Anyway, Stephano,” He said. “After dinner I was thinking of taking you out with me; I need an extra hand with some experimental things.” He sent the De la Vegas a wink.

“I think I’d prefer to stay here,” Rodriguez said. “I want to read up on poisonous venoms.”

Usnavi and Sonny sent each other a fearful glance.

 _'Uh-oh…’_ Chip whimpered.

“Oh no, I insist you come with me.” John kept going. “Usnavi, Sonny, and Chip can take care of the reptiles while we’re gone.”

“Then take them with you.” Rodriguez said, his voice becoming impatient. “I’ll stay here.”

John sighed slightly, “Well, with all due respect, I don’t feel exactly comfortable leaving my reptiles with a stranger.” He said. “These three already get along with them really well.”

As if to prove a point, the Winged Lizard flew down and perched on Usnavi’s shoulder, and Sonny tossed it a little bite of his food before scratching its chin.

Rodriguez sighed, “Fine,” He relented. “But before we go, I’d like to make a quick phone call.”

“No problem.” John said. “The phone’s in the living room.”

The rest of dinner went by quickly, and John got ready to go while Rodriguez made his phone call. Usnavi, Sonny, and Chip approached John as he loaded his truck,

“Uncle John…” Usnavi started.

“Hey relax,” John said, closing the trunk. “Everything’s gonna be fine, I promise.”

“But you don’t know him like we do!” Sonny protested. “What if something happens to you? What if…” Sonny trailed off and Chip whimpered at the possible scenarios. If something happened to Uncle John, what would happen to them? Would Rodriguez take them by force?

“I think you guys are underestimating what I can do.” John said, putting his hands on their shoulders. “I may be a scientist, but I’m more than capable of handling myself when things get rough.” He squeezed their shoulders looked at them meaningfully, “You guys just stay inside, keep the door locked, and I’ll be back before you know it.”

“Are you sure?” Usnavi asked.

“I promise you,” John said, giving them a wink before turning them around and walking them towards the house. “Just sit tight; everything will be fine. I’ll see you in two hours, max.” He gave them a light push towards the door and went back to his truck.

The cousins gave each other an uneasy glance and went back inside, just as Rodriguez was hanging up the phone. He walked into the foyer and Usnavi pulled Sonny and Chip against the wall with him as he passed.

“We don’t know what you’re up to, but we’re not gonna let you get away with it!” Sonny hissed.

“If you hurt us, or Uncle John, you’re never getting the fortune!” Usnavi added.

Rodriguez chuckled, “If I wanted to hurt any of you, blood would’ve been staining these floors a long time ago.” He pulled out his dagger, prompting Chip to step forward with a growl. “But remember this; accidents can happen.”

The De la Vegas glared at him and they heard John honk his horn from outside.

Rodriguez put his dagger away, “Just you wait, Orphans.” He said lowly. “By tomorrow, your precious Uncle John will be long gone, and you’ll be in my grasp; and I promise you, I’ll keep all three of you locked away for the next four years if that’s what it takes to get your fortune.”

Usnavi’s grip on his family tightened and Rodriguez went out the door. Once it closed, the De la Vegas hurried to the window and watched John’s truck drive down the driveway.

All they could do now was wait and hope.

* * *

John ran through the forest and up the mountain trail as fast as he could, glancing behind him to make sure no one was following. He had managed to distract Rodriguez by giving him some meaningless task under the guise of research, so hopefully that would give him the time he needed. Driving this far away with him had been insufferable, which means unpleasant, or really any negative adjective you can think of, so John was glad to be rid of him; for now, at least.

John made it to the top where a wooden platform with a railing was sitting, with an old rusty pair of coin binoculars sitting alone. John rushed up to it and reached into his pocket, pulling out a golden spyglass. He placed one end on a strange design on the back, only to have the spyglass slide in like a key.

John gave it a twist and a small compartment popped out, revealing a scrap of paper. Written on the paper were the numbers 2264. John nodded and pulled out his spyglass. He twisted the spyglass, entering the numbers and shut the compartment.

The eyes of the binoculars then lit up brightly, shining through the night. John extended his spyglass and opened the end, looking through it properly, as far away, another light began to flash multiple times. Through the spyglass, the number of flashes were counted, slowly making letters appear, to form a small sentence.

 **‘Hello John’** The light spelled.

The light disappeared and John turned the knob on the binoculars, making his own light go dark; he quickly wrote the words down on the back of the paper he received. When he was done, he turned the knob again and lit the binoculars back up, making the next message appear.

The next part made John start to pale. **‘The De la Vegas are in danger’**

John turned off his light and wrote it down. He wasn’t liking where this was going. He turned on his light again, unaware of a figure coming through the trees behind him.  

The process repeated once more and got the next sequence. **‘Take the S.S. Ariel tomorrow’**

John turned off his light and wrote it down, sighing deeply, “You’re terrible at being sneaky.” The figure behind him froze.

John safely pocketed his spyglass and slip of paper and turned around to face Rodriguez, “So, you think you can just waltz into the lives of my family and do whatever you want?” John leaned against the railing, “I was warned about how low you would go to get your hands on them, but this…this is just sick.”

“So, you know who I am.” Rodriguez said.

“Of course, I do; everyone does.” John said, as the two slowly circled each other. “And it drives me crazy that no one else can see through your terrible acting.”

Rodriguez gasped as if he had just been slapped, “How dare you!”

“How dare I?” John demanded. “When you’re the one who threatened my remaining family? And just when they were starting to feel like they were finally safe from your grasp.”

“They will never be safe from me.” Rodriguez growled. “Not until their fortune is mine.”

“Well, they’re safe from you now; you and your little clown posse.” John said. “Now, it’s just you and me; and I’m gonna make damn sure that you stay out of the De la Vega’s lives forever.”

Rodriguez shook his head, “I suppose you’re right,” He said. “Those orphan brats are safe from me…but you aren’t.” He snapped his fingers…but nothing happened. Rodriguez frowned, “But you aren’t.” He repeated louder and snapping again; still nothing.

John chuckled, “Man, you’re really bad at this.” They both looked as another figure, tall and broad, emerged from the trees, one that Rodriguez didn’t recognize.

John stepped towards Rodriguez, “Now…I suggest you and your little band, stay put, until the authorities arrive.” He said. “Your sick game is over.”

Rodriguez glared at him, before quickly turning tail and running back down the mountain path. John sighed and turned to the figure, “I gotta say Alex, you look pretty damn intimidating like that.”

The figure stepped down off a stump and came into the light, “If only I could attack him from that height.” He said.

John grinned and grasped the man’s arm, “Good to see you, Alex.”

“You too.” Alex responded with a grin, before shaking his head and looking where Rodriguez had run off, “Man, what a piece of work; you should’ve punched him, I know I would’ve.”

“Trust me, it was tempting.” John agreed. “But if he shows his face again, I’m not holding back.” John pulled out his spyglass and the paper, “Now, I need to get the rest of the that message.” They walked over to the binoculars and John turned on the light again. His spyglass translated the last sequence of flashes and he wrote it down.

Both he and Alex took in the message. **‘Hello John. The De la Vegas are in danger. Take them on the S.S. Ariel tomorrow to Puerto Rico.’**

They looked at each other, “Things are probably worse than we thought.” Alex muttered.

“Think you can hook me up with four tickets to PR by tomorrow?” John asked. Alex patted his back, “What do you take us for? Laf will get ‘em to you in two hours, tops.” He said.

“Looks like I’ll be home late tonight.” John remarked, gazing at the message, determination in his gaze.

* * *

Meanwhile, back at the house, the De la Vegas were desperately trying to keep from panicking. It had been hours since John had left, way over two, and they hadn’t heard anything from him!

The family of three had abandoned going to bed, even though it was nearly midnight, and instead, opted to wait in the Reptile Room, hoping that the presence of their new friends would sooth them. While it kept them from breaking down, it didn’t keep them being scared.

Usnavi was pacing the room absently, Sonny was sitting on the couch, his leg jittering like crazy, and Chip was sitting by the entrance of the Reptile Room, on constant alert for any sign of trouble.

“What do we do if he doesn’t come back?” Sonny asked fearfully.

Usnavi ran a hand through his hair, “I guess…call Mr. Adams?”

Chip snorted, _‘I wouldn’t trust that guy to tie his own shoelaces!’_

Sonny nodded, “He’s right; maybe we should just run away.”

“Again, where would we go?” Usnavi asked.

“I don’t know, just far away from Rodriguez!”

Usnavi sighed, “Sonny, we went over this, if Rodriguez could find us here, he could find us again! If we go out on our own, it’s only a matter of time until he gets us!”

“Then what can we do?!” Sonny exclaimed, looking at his cousin from the back of the couch. “We can’t just let Rodriguez get us! Once you turn twenty-eight, we’re dead meat if he has us!”

Usnavi gripped his hair, “I…I don’t know, mijo! I-”

Usnavi was cut off as they heard a motor outside. Sonny’s grip tightened on the couch and Chip stood on alert.

 _‘I’ll scope it out.’_ Chip barked, and slipped out the door.

Sonny got up and the two cousins found their way to each other, Usnavi holding Sonny tightly; this was it. Whoever came through that door would decide their fate. They jumped as Chip started to bark loudly, unfortunately they were too terrified to listen to what he was saying. They held their breath as they heard the front door open, Chip still barking and…!

“Whoa, hey boy! Easy!”

Usnavi and Sonny froze at the familiar voice. The two cousins hurried to the door and peeked out to see none other than John, kneeling on the ground as Chip happily licked his face. Their faces lit up and they ran out of the room, “Uncle John!”

John stood up as they ran towards him, “Hey, I’m surprised to see you guys still up-whoa!”

Sonny just about barreled into his chest, followed by Usnavi, who being only a few inches under John, was a bit gentler, but still gripped him fiercely as he hugged him from the side next to his cousin.

“You’re okay!” Usnavi exclaimed.

“We thought Rodriguez got you!” Sonny added, peeking up at him.

 _‘We were scared to death!’_ Chip barked, just about jumping on his hind legs.

John blinked and then laughed, returning the hug, “I’m fine, don’t worry.” He said, pulling away and looking between them, “In fact, you don’t have to worry anymore.”

Sonny lit up, “You mean…”

John nodded, “I took care of that bastard; he won’t be bothering us anymore.”

Usnavi smiled in disbelief, “What did you do?” He asked. “How did you get rid of him?”

“With a couple choice words, and the help a few good friends of mine.” John answered with a wink. “The authorities are on their way as we speak.”

Sonny and Usnavi felt so elated they thought they could cry. Having the feeling of hope from the possibility that Rodriguez was gone was one they couldn’t possibly describe.

“Well, it’s been a hectic night, for all of us.” John said. “Why don’t we settle in the living room and I’ll make us some hot chocolate; we have a lot to talk about.”

* * *

A little while later, the family of four was sitting around the coffee table, with mugs of hot chocolate and plates of chocolate cake. “Well guys, I finally got an answer for my trip.” John said, making Usnavi and Sonny perk up a bit. “We’re not gonna spend the season cooped up in a lab; we’re going to Puerto Rico.”

Usnavi almost dropped his mug, “Puerto Rico?” He asked in shock. “Really?”

“That’s where Mr. and Mrs. Rosario were from…” Sonny said softly.

“And it’s full of all kinds of amphibians.” John added. “We’re going to not only embrace PR’s amazing culture, but we’re going to explore its unknown corners.” He leaned forward, “So, what do you say, De la Vegas? You in?”

Usnavi and Sonny glanced at each other with a smile, “We’re in.” Usnavi said.

John grinned and stood up, “Well then, we have a lot of planning to do!” He wandered to a bookshelf and found a map of Pureto Rico, lying it out on the table around their hot chocolate and cake.

They ate their treats and listened intently as John listed out all the places they would travel, feeling their excitement grow. Kevin and Camila had told them so many things about their home country, and now they could finally experience it themselves!

“…And then we’ll travel north of there, in search of a rumored three-eyed frog.” John continued. “First one to find it, gets to name it.”

Sonny smiled in excitement, when he felt a familiar weight in his pocket. His smile faded and he took a deep breath, “Uncle John?”

“Yeah?”

Sonny reached into his pocket and pulled out the cylinder, “We…found this after the fire.” He said, holding it out to John. “I think it belonged to _Tia_ Luz and _Tio_ Luis; do you know what it is?”

John took it, his eyes widening for a moment before softening, “I know it all too well.” He reached into his pocket and pulled out his spyglass. Usnavi and Sonny started, realizing that the two had exact designs.

“This is part of a spyglass.” John said. “Looks like one part of it broke.” He looked at the De la Vega’s, whose eyes were pleading for answers and he smiled. “Don’t worry, Puerto Rico will have one other thing besides reptiles; answers.”

“Really?” Usnavi asked.

“I can only imagine how confused you guys must be about this.” John said. “But I promise you, all will become clear when we reach our destination.” He handed the cylinder back to Sonny. “In the meantime, keep this safe.”

Sonny nodded and put it back in his pocket.

“Now, we have a big day tomorrow, so I think it’s high time we got some well-earned sleep.” John said.

They began piling their plates and cups when John spied an empty bowl near the end of the table. “Chip, did you eat all those marshmallows?” John asked, scratching the dog’s ears.

 _‘They were amazing.’_ Chip snuffed.

Usnavi smiled, “He said-”

“I know what he said,” John said, giving the husky a smile, “Looks like we finally found another snack you like besides chips.”

The family shared a small laugh, as Usnavi and Sonny felt more at home than they had in what felt like forever. John could understand Chip; now they truly felt like a complete family again.

The De la Vegas all got ready for bed, John meeting them in front of their room. “I’ll be waking you up bright and early tomorrow.” He said, holding up their boat tickets. “We don’t want to miss out ship.”

 _‘Can’t wait.’_ Chip barked.

Usnavi nodded, “Good night.”

“Good night, Uncle John.” Sonny chimed in.

John smiled and ruffled his curly hair with a wink, “I’ll see you guys in the morning.” The De la Vegas entered their room and John headed downstairs to the Reptile Room, a feeling of warmth and love filling the house.

But, I’m truly sorry to say, that this feeling of warmth would quickly be doused by icy waters of despair. Despair that the De la Vegas would discover the next morning as Count Rodriguez's last words to them would come to fruition.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hmmmmmmmmm I REALLY don't wanna do thiiiiiiiiis...I love writing John...why does the series have to do this to meeeeeeeee?


	11. 2.5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which the De la Vegas are thrust back into a terrible tragedy.

Not many people know the feeling of waking up, knowing deep down that something is horribly wrong. I can tell you that it’s the worst, most chilling feeling imaginable. And I’m afraid to say that the De la Vega’s got that very same feeling, when they were woken the next morning by the Winged Lizard and Screeching Iguana, and not their Uncle John.

Usnavi’s eyes fluttered open as he heard the soft rumbling of the iguana sitting on the nightstand. Meanwhile, the Winged Lizard crawled up Sonny’s bedsheets and flicked his tongue across his chin, waking the younger boy.

Chip opened his eyes and lifted his head at the familiar noises of his reptile companions, _‘What’s going on?’_ He yawned.

The two cousins slowly sat up as confusion settled in. John had said that they were going to wake them early, and the sun was already in the sky, dimmed by a cover of clouds. The house was completely silent, and the De la Vega’s felt a pit form in their stomachs. They got out of bed, the Winged Lizard on Sonny’s shoulder and the Screeching Iguana on Usnavi’s back as they hurried out of their room.

“Uncle John?” Usnavi called, descending the stairs.

“Uncle John!” Sonny called.

They did a quick round through the house, but found every room empty, leaving the Reptile Room. They would have checked there first, but the sick feeling within them kept them from investigating the room until the last minute. They entered the room was dark and foreboding thanks to the cloud cover outside, and the De la Vegas spied a figure slumped in the desk chair, facing away from them.

Sonny gripped Usnavi’s arm as they slowly walked around to the front of the chair, only to pale in horror from the worst sight imaginable. In the chair, lay Uncle John, his eyes wide and unblinking on his pale skin, a mark resembling a snake bite clear on his cheek.

John Laurens was dead.

“Uncle John…” Sonny rasped.

“Oh god…” Usnavi breathed, pulling Sonny close. Chip whimpered and nudged John’s lifeless hand with his nose, as if hoping that would wake him up.

“How…” Usnavi whispered, tears coming to his eyes, “How could this happen?”

Sonny pressed his face into Usnavi’s shoulder, “We know exactly how this happened.” He said tightly. Indeed, it was very clear what had happened. None of the cages containing the poisonous snakes were open, and none of John’s reptiles would dare attack him. Only one creature could have done such a terrible thing, and it wasn’t any kind of reptile.

It was then that Usnavi realized that they most likely weren’t alone. Without a word, he quickly led Sonny out of the room, “Chip, c’mon!” He called.

“Cuz, where are we going?” Sonny asked as they hurried up the stairs, stopping when they got to the entrance of their room.

“Sonny,” Usnavi grasped his cousin’s shoulders, “Go and start packing our things.” He glanced at the door, “If Rodriguez is here, then Uncle John can’t protect us anymore.”

“What will we do?” Sonny asked.

“We’re getting out of here,” Usnavi answered firmly. “The first chance we get, we’ll make a break for it and call Mr. Adams.”

 _‘Where will we go?’_ Chip snuffed.

“Like Sonny said before, far away from Rodriguez.” Usnavi answered. “Now go!”

Sonny nodded and hurried into the room, shutting the door, and Usnavi and Chip retreated to the foyer, ready to run to the safety of the Reptile Room in case things went south. Rodriguez still didn’t know how to open it, thankfully. Usnavi glanced at the doorway and felt his chest tighten, remembering that their uncle’s body was in there.

“Quite a terrible accident in there, don’t you think?” Usnavi whirled around to see Rodriguez, still disguised, coming down the stairs, his two suitcases in hand. “Whoever discovers that is going to be very upset.”

“You murdered him!” Usnavi cried.

Rodriguez set his suitcases down, “What are you talking about, he was clearly bitten by a snake.” He said. “You saw the teeth marks on his cheek, his pale waxy skin, his unblinking eyes-”

‘Shut up!’ Chip barked loudly, baring his fangs.

“Don’t talk like that!” Usnavi exclaimed weakly, starting to be overcome by grief.

“You’re right, there’s no time for chitchat.” Rodriguez said. “Come! We have a ship to catch; we’re going to Puerto Rico.”

“We wouldn’t go to the end of the driveway with you!” Usnavi said sharply.

“Well then, I guess I’ll pack my own luggage.” Rodriguez picked up the two suitcases and headed for the door.

But what made Usnavi freeze was the pained yelp that emitted from the larger one when it hit the doorway. “Sonny?!”

Chip snarled loudly, _‘Oh, you son of a bitch!’_

The two ran out of the house as Rodriguez opened the trunk of John’s truck, “Let him out of there!” Usnavi yelled.

Rodriguez looked at him, “Hmm…no.” He tossed the squirming suitcase into the trunk, causing another pained yell from Sonny as it landed on its side.

Usnavi saw red and started towards him, “You let him go right now, or I’ll-”

Rodriguez grabbed the front of Usnavi’s shirt and whirled him around, slamming his back against the side of the truck. “Or you’ll what?” Rodriguez asked.

Chip continued to growl loudly, _‘Let go of my humans!’_

Rodriguez rolled his eyes, “You know, it astounds me,” He said. “The three of you seem to be quite smart and yet you constantly forget about things like this.” The dagger appeared in his hand and he positioned it against Usnavi’s neck. Chip’s growling died down and he slowly backed away.

“Good dog.” Rodriguez sneered before turning his attention back to Usnavi, who eyed the knife with wide eyes.

He yanked him forwards and moved them so they were facing the open trunk, where the suitcase was still squirming. Muffled speech could be heard that easily translated into, “Let me out! Let me out, you son of a bitch!”

Rodriguez frowned, “We’ll have to do something about all that squirming when we get on the ship.” He mused.

“Let him out!” Usnavi protested. “He won’t be able to breathe in there!”

“Really?” Rodriguez pulled the knife away from Usnavi, “Then I’ll put some air holes in.”

Usnavi and Sonny both let out a short scream of horror as Rodriguez plunged the knife into the suitcase; thankfully, when the knife was removed, no blood painted it. The suitcase no longer moved, most likely because Sonny was in shock of what just occurred while Usnavi fought to keep from collapsing where he stood.

Rodriguez pointed the dagger at Usnavi again, “Now, both you and your mutt, get in the car,” He ordered dangerously. “Next time, I won’t miss.”

Usnavi held up his now shaking hands, “Okay, okay,” He said softly and quickly, “Just leave Sonny alone.”

Rodriguez smiled and took the knife away to slam the trunk shut. He let go of Usnavi’s shirt and Usnavi and Chip hurried into the backseat. Rodriguez made a point to come around and zip-tie Usnavi’s wrists to the indoor handles of the truck, the material most likely taken from the Reptile Room. Chip sat next to him and peeked over the seat at the suitcase which held Sonny, wishing he had opposable thumbs so he could sneak back and free his younger human.

“You know you can really only blame yourselves,” Rodriguez said as he took his seat, “If I hadn’t been stranded, I would’ve waited until we got to Puerto Rico to kill your beloved Uncle John.”

Usnavi tugged his restraints, but zip-ties are not easily swayed by force alone. Chip then whined and moved the floor of the truck, _‘Keep him talking.’_

Usnavi looked down as Chip began to silently chew on the zip-tie and he understood, “So you’re just going to leave him there?” He demanded.

“Trust me, he doesn’t mind.” Rodriguez said smugly, turning the car on. “Besides, by the time the police find him, you’ll be long gone and I’ll be taking advantage of Puerto Rico’s extremely lax guardianship laws.” He began to drive down the driveway, just as Chip fully bit through Usnavi’s bonds.

“You won’t get away this this.” Usnavi growled, keeping his wrists low.

Rodriguez smiled and looked back at him, “And who’s going to stop me?”

At that moment, another car turned into the driveway. It’s very odd for an accident to be a fortunate event, and this one may have just saved the De la Vegas lives. Rodriguez turned around and swerved, driving right off the driveway and into one of the snake hedges, which promptly fell down and crushed the hood of the truck.

Rodriguez cursed loudly and Usnavi was out of the car in an instant, Chip following. He threw open the trunk, unzipped the suitcase as fast as possible, and there was Sonny, curled into a ball with his wrists zip-tied in front of him and a cloth tied between his teeth.

 _“Dios mio…”_ Usnavi breathed, sitting Sonny up and placed his arms on his back and under his legs, lifting him out of the suitcase. Usnavi sat him on grass and knelt next to him while Rodriguez planted himself in the view of the other driver to yell at him.

 _“Mijo_ , are you alright?” Usnavi asked, untying the gag while Chip gnawed the zip-tie off his wrists.

Sonny winced and licked his lips as the cloth was removed, “No.” He rubbed the back of his head once his hands were free, “Son of a bitch hit me!”

“What?!” Usnavi began to check Sonny’s head, thankfully finding no blood matting his curls.

“He was on me the second I got in our room.” Sonny said in an annoyed and defeated tone. Usnavi mentally kicked himself; he shouldn’t have let Sonny go alone!

“De la Vegas?” A familiar voice called from the other car. “De la Vegas, is that you?” Let’s just say, the little family never thought they’d be so happy that Mr. Adams ran into them.

Usnavi helped Sonny to his feet and they hurried over to him, “Mr. Adams!” Usnavi exclaimed.

“I never thought I’d say this, but thank god you ran into us!” Sonny agreed.

“Well I wouldn’t say that, it was clearly the fault of the other driver.” Adams said. “But on another subject, what are you doing out here in your pajamas and who is this man?”

“I am Stephano, Dr. Laurens’ assistant,” Rodriguez said, putting his accent on once again. “Or, I guess I should say, former assistant.”

“Uncle John’s dead!” Sonny blurted out, his voice shaky with grief.

“Dead?” Adams exclaimed. “That’s terrible, what on earth happened?”

“He was bitten by a poisonous snake!” Rodriguez said. “I was on my way to get the coroner, and these three were too hysterical to be left alone.”

“No, he wasn’t, he was taking us to Puerto Rico!” Usnavi exclaimed.

“He put me in a suitcase!” Sonny added angrily.

“See? Hysterical.” Rodriguez said.

“Now, now, you two must be confused,” Adams said. “Dr. Laurens was taking them to Puerto Rico; he called me last night to get these passports.”

He pulled out four passports and Rodriguez quickly swiped them, “I’ll take care of them.”

“We’re not confused and we’re not hysterical!” Sonny exclaimed. “This guy is Count Rodriguez in disguise!”

“He followed us here and killed Uncle John!” Usnavi agreed. “I am who?” Rodriguez asked, feigning innocence. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“You poor things must be so distraught about this.” Adams said to the De la Vegas. “As you can see, this man is clearly not Count Rodriguez.”

“Yes, he is!” Sonny protested. “Anyone can see that it’s him!”

 _‘Except for this moron…’_ Chip growled; if dogs could roll their eyes, Chip would have done so.

“Who is this Count Rodriguez?” Rodriguez asked.

“Oh, he’s a terrible man who tries to steal this poor family’s fortune.” Adams answered.

“Really?” Rodriguez asked, pretending to be shocked, “Do I look anything like this Rodriguez?”

“Yeah!” Sonny responded instantly.

“Now, Sonny.” Adams put a hand on his shoulder before addressing Rodriguez, “No, you look nothing like him at all.”

“Because he’s in disguise!” Sonny nearly yelled.

“He’s an actor, Mr. Adams! He knows how to dress up!” Usnavi chimed in.

“Now that’s enough!” Adams exclaimed. “This has been a very troubling morning; before we do anything else, we should call the authorities.”

“Why?” Rodriguez asked. “The car wasn’t that badly damaged.”

“For Dr. Laurens.” Adams clarified.

“Of course.” Rodriguez said tightly.

The De la Vegas felt the smallest hint of relief, even though they felt far from safe. For now, they had bought themselves a little more time. But who knew if they would safely survive the events that would follow?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *cries softly* I'm sorry John, I didn't want to kill you but the plot demanded it!
> 
> Also, I believe now I am ALSO the first person to put Sonny in a suitcase. He's small enough, I'm sure he could fit XD


	12. 2.6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which the De la Vegas solve the mystery of their uncle's murder in the face of ignorance and resistance

When they got back into the house, Adams began to call the police while Rodriguez talked furiously in the other room through his little radio. Usnavi and Sonny took the time to change out of their pajamas and they slowly descended the stairs.

“What do we do now?” Sonny asked softly.

“We’ll find a way.” Usnavi said. “We just need something to prove that Stephano is Rodriguez.”

 _‘What about his tattoo?’_ Chip barked.

Sonny and Usnavi brightened; how could they have forgotten? “Good boy!” Usnavi praised, and they approached Adams, who was just putting down the phone.

“I managed to get through to the local Sheriff’s department.” Adams said proudly. “Apparently, there’s an escaped cow giving them trouble, but they’ll send someone as soon as they’re able.”

“I hope it’s soon.” Sonny muttered, while Usnavi rubbed his shoulder soothingly.

A few moments later, the doorbell rang. “The must’ve made quick work of that cow.” Adams commented as he went to answer the door.

 _‘I’m suspicious.’_ Chip snuffed.

“Same here.” Sonny agreed, while Usnavi nodded.

Adams opened the door, revealing a nurse…or rather, what looked like a nurse. Usnavi and Sonny stepped back in horror; it was the Skinny Lady, from Rodriguez’s troupe!

“Did someone call a coroner?” The Skinny Lady asked.

“And the police?” A bunch more faces poked through the door and entered the house; it was the rest of the troupe! They were all dressed as authority figures that are dispatched at a crime scene, from police officers to forensics scientists.

“Mr. Adams, these people are all with Count Rodriguez!” Usnavi exclaimed.

“And they’re all wearing costumes!” Sonny added.

“Don’t be ridiculous.” Adams dismissed. “Adults don’t wear costumes unless it’s for a Charity Ball or if they’re employed actors.”

“They _are_ employed actors!” Sonny nearly yelled.

 _‘What is with this guy?!’_ Chip yapped.

“The body is this way, in the Reptile Room.” Rodriguez said, and the henchmen all filed into the room.

“I don’t know how I feel about leaving them in a room with Uncle John, dead or not.” Usnavi muttered. Sonny and Chip nodded.

“Well, why don’t we go and observe.” Adams suggested. “That should ease your feelings.”

 _‘That’s a terrible idea.’_ Chip growled.

“Perhaps the family should wait outside.” Rodriguez said. “Being in a room with a dead body could be very traumatizing.”

“We’ve already been in a room with a dead thanks to you…” Sonny muttered.

“Why don’t we let the professionals investigate the body, and I’ll stay here with the De la Vegas?” Rodriguez said. All at once, Sonny stepped back, Usnavi pulled Sonny close, and Chip silently bared his fangs.

“Why don’t we wait with Mr. Adams while you go with the professionals?” Usnavi offered quickly.

“That sounds like an excellent idea.” Adams agreed.

Rodriguez’s jaw tightened, “Very well; this way.” He said, and lead the group into the Reptile Room. Usnavi and Sonny visibly deflated once he was out of sight.

 _‘Nice save.’_ Chip barked.

Adams faced them. “I’m very sorry, you three.” He said. “Dr. Laurens seemed like a very appropriate guardian; it’s such a pity.”

“He was more than appropriate.” Usnavi said softly, both his and Sonny’s faces falling in sadness. With everything that had happened they kept forgetting that the one guardian that seemed to make them feel safe and actually treated them like family was dead and gone.

Sonny looked up at Adams, “You won’t let… _him_ be our new guardian, will you?”

“Oh, of course not!” Adams exclaimed. “I’m not just going to hand you and your fortune off to the first person I see.” Usnavi and Sonny smiled slightly in relief.

“Not without some very thorough paperwork.” Adams added, making their smiles fade slightly. Well, it was better than nothing.

The group waited outside for a good long while until Rodriguez called them in. Thankfully, Uncle John’s body was now covered with a sheet, sparing the De la Vegas from seeing his sorry state for a second time.

“The nurse has completed her autopsy.” Rodriguez announced.

“Well?” Adams prompted.

“Snake bite.” The Skinny Lady said simply. “Two bite marks on the cheek; only a snake could have done that.”

Sonny shook his head, “But Uncle John is-” He sadly caught himself, “-was one of the top herpetologists. He wouldn’t just let himself get bitten.” Usnavi glanced at the cages where the more toxic snakes were kept; all the cages were locked up tight.

“I tested his blood.” The Hairy Man said, dressed like a forensic scientist. “And I found the venom of the deadliest snake known to man.”

“Which one?” Adams asked nervously.

“The Incredibly Deadly Viper!” Rodriguez said dramatically.

Now, if you knew nothing about the reptiles Dr. Laurens kept, this would seem perfectly logical. But it was not for the De la Vegas, causing them to frown suspiciously.

 _‘Uh…no.’_ Chip snorted.

“That can’t be right.” Usnavi said flatly. “The Incredibly Deadly Viper is the least harmful creature in this entire room.”

Now it was everyone else’s turn to frown suspiciously. “Now, Usnavi, it’s called the Incredibly Deadly Viper.” Adams said. “How could it be harmless?”

“Uncle John called it that as a joke.” Sonny explained. “He was gonna play a prank on his colleagues.”

“What an unstable man.” Rodriguez remarked.

“Shut up!” Sonny snapped.

“Sonny!” Adams exclaimed.

“Look, the Incredibly Deadly Viper didn’t kill anyone and we can prove it.” Usnavi stepped in.

 _‘You are not framing my best friend for murder!’_ Chip barked.

“How?” Rodriguez asked a bit too confidently, “It’s not even here.”

Everyone turned, and sure enough, the Viper’s cage was wide open. “Ah, I see.” Adams said. “Dr. Laurens must have forgotten to lock the cage, allowing the viper to sneak up and bite him.”

“Well, that does it, case closed.” The One-Eyed Man said.

“Oh! And would you look at the time!” Rodriguez exclaimed, looking at his watch. “The S.S. Ariel leaves soon; you three better pack your bags and get ready for a Puerto Rican adventure!”

 _‘Like hell!’_ Chip growled.

“We can’t go!” Sonny blurted out quickly, looking at Mr. Adams, “We can’t go with him, we don’t have the paperwork you mentioned, remember?” Usnavi felt a surge of pride and Rodriguez glared at Sonny.

“I’m afraid he’s right.” Adams said. “You seem like a nice person, Stephano, but I’m afraid we must be on our way.” He started towards the door, “Come De la Vegas.” The family of three all inwardly sighed and hurried to follow Adams out of the house, when the One-Eyed Man swiftly blocked their path.

“You’re not going anywhere.” Rodriguez said lowly, almost breaking his disguise.

“And why not?” Adams asked.

“Because there’s a dangerous snake in this house, meaning that no one comes in and no one leaves!” Rodriguez said. “Quarantine the house!”

The Tatooed Man stepped forward and pointed to the Skinny Lady and the Quiet Man, “You two make a perimeter around the house; no one gets in or out!” He ordered. He then pointed to the One-Eyed Man and the Hairy Man, “You two get that body into the van!”

“But you just said no one could leave the house.” Sonny couldn’t help but snark.

Rodriguez sent the boy a death glare, “He meant nobody except them!”

“Usnavi, Sonny, Chip, why don’t you three go upstairs?” Adams said. “The adults will handle it from here.”

“But-” Sonny tried to protest.

“The adults will handle it.” Adams repeated firmly.

Usnavi pressed his lips together and took Sonny’s shoulder, “C’mon, mijo.” He said, his voice clearly repressing frustration as he led them to the stairs. “We’ll figure out how to handle it ourselves.”

 _‘You can say that again.’_ Chip snuffed.

But as they climbed the stairs, the Hairy Man and the One-Eyed Man were carrying the body out on a poorly made gurney. The family of three couldn’t help but watch sadly as their beloved uncle was slowly carted out the door. They couldn’t help but wonder what could have happened if they had done something differently, if they had knocked one little event out of place. But it was all wishful thinking, as nothing can undo death.

They went into their room and shut the door. “Now what?” Sonny asked, sitting on his bed, “We know Rodriguez did everything but Adams won’t believe us.”

“Not without proof.” Usnavi added as Chip sat on the bed next to Sonny.

Chip lay his head on Sonny’s lap, whining softly while Sonny scratched behind his ears, “Don’t worry buddy, we’ll clear the Viper’s name.”

 _‘I hope he’s okay…_ ’ Chip whimpered. The Husky and the Viper had grown very close, bonding over their love of biting objects.

“We need to find the snake and whatever Rodriguez used to kill Uncle John.” Usnavi said, pacing the room and wringing his hat, ready to put it on if need be.

“But there’s no way into the Reptile Room from here.” Sonny pointed out.

Usnavi paced a bit more until his eyes fell on their window a sturdy gooseneck lamp between their beds and the strong cord attached to it. Usnavi frowned lightly; Sonny was the only one who was light and small enough to pull this off, but Usnavi really didn’t want him to be alone again. But they couldn’t just sit around; it was the only way.

Usnavi suppressed his worry and put his hat on his head. “I think I might have a way…”

* * *

Luckily, the De la Vegas put their plan into action just in time, as Count Rodriguez was on his way to enter the room, trusty dagger in hand. “Oh, Orphans!” He sang, pushing the door open. “Where are you?”

The room was completely empty, but if Rodriguez was a bit more observant he would have noticed the lamp missing from the nightstand and the chord tied to the leg of one of the beds. Outside the window, Sonny held onto the lamp for dear life, hanging a good ten feet above the ground. Not high enough to kill, but high enough to cause fright and panic for fear or injury.

As he hung, Sonny couldn’t help but glance behind him at the eye-shaped maze before he couldn’t hold on anymore. Thankfully, he landed safely, and scurried through the snake door in the back of the Reptile Room. It was, in reality, a Doggy Door, but John had had it installed so the snakes and reptiles could wander freely. Sonny had a pretty good idea now of where the Incredibly Deadly Viper had vanished off to.

Sonny scurried through the room on all fours while the adults babbled to themselves in the back, and he made his way to the library section of the Reptile Room. Sonny sat behind the desk, catching his breath, and carefully peeked over the desk, spying a familiar black leather notebook.

Meanwhile, we must rewind time a bit to when Rodriguez first entered the De la Vega’s bedroom. If you recall, Rodriguez entered the room to find it empty. While this was because Sonny was hanging out the window, Usnavi and Chip were hiding in plain sight. Their door pushed open, so Usnavi and Chip had stood right where the door opened so Rodriguez slipped right past them, allowing the two to hurry down the stairs and outside. Rodriguez’s henchmen weren’t doing very well with making sure the quarantine stayed restricted.

Usnavi and Chip ran down the driveway to where Uncle John’s truck was still crashed into the hedge. The trunk was still open and holding Rodriguez’s two suitcases. “Alright, boy, you know what to do.” Usnavi said to Chip.

 _‘Roger.’_ Chip snuffed and ran off into the yard.

Usnavi pulled the unopened suitcase towards him and quickly began rummaging through its contents. He put aside any clothing items that didn’t even complete a full outfit, and pulled out a number of strange items, such as two empty syringes and a pair of opera glasses. But what caught his attention was an empty bottle that clearly belonged in Uncle John’s venom cabinet.

“Snooping seems to run in your pathetic little family.” Usnavi jumped and whirled around to be faced with Rodriguez.

“I thought you were the nice orphan,” Rodriguez remarked as he pinned Usnavi against the car with surprising strength, “Nice people don’t go digging through other people’s things.”

“After everything you’ve done to us, I’d say it was justified!” Usnavi responded sharply.

“So the smart mouth doesn’t just belong to your cousin,” Rodriguez commented. “Now, we can do this the easy way or the hard way; I have four tickets to Puerto Rico with me right now,” He said. “I was going to take your baby cousin and stupid dog along, since that’s just the kind of guardian I am,” His face turned sinister, “but I’ll easily be satisfied with just one of you.”

All of a sudden there was a yip and yowl. The noise startled Rodriguez, allowing Usnavi to shove the man back and run back towards the house, Rodriguez following. In the Reptile Room, everyone turned and ran towards the sound to see a husky facing down a large black viper. Adams and the henchmen were running this way and that, panicking loudly as the black snake coiled around the dog.

“It’s the Incredibly Deadly Viper!” Adams cried. “Someone, please, help that poor dog!”

Usnavi bit back a laugh; seeing the appeal of naming the viper wrong was actually quite funny. “Chip is just fine,” He said. “Look.” Everyone watched as Chip barked at the viper, but not in the way that you’d expect. Chip’s tail was wagging madly as he pranced around the snake, rolling on his back every now and then while the snake hissed happily and nuzzled the dog.

“It’s…playing.” The Skinny Lady said.

“With the Incredibly Deadly Viper?!” Adams exclaimed.

“The Incredibly Deadly Viper, a creature who wouldn’t hurt a fly.” Everyone turned as Sonny exited the Reptile Room, a black notebook open in his hands. “I know this because I tried to feed it flies. The Incredibly Deadly Viper is friendly, kind, playful, smart, and can make a wonderful addition to the family.”

Sonny snapped the book shut and held it up, “This is Uncle John’s expedition journal, listing all the snakes he ever discovered.” He glanced at Chip and the viper, “And I think it’s pretty clear now that the Incredibly Deadly Viper couldn’t have killed Uncle John.”

Adams, and even all the henchmen seemed quite impressed by the presentation, while Usnavi beamed proudly at him. “I suppose it does look…quite harmless,” Adams admitted, though he still flinched when Sonny knelt down to give the viper a pat.

“Good job, buddy,” Sonny whispered to Chip.

“Like that changes anything!” Rodriguez exclaimed. “That room is full of venomous snakes that could have done it!”

Sonny rolled his eyes, “Shut up already!”

“Sonny, you can’t speak to an adult that way!” Adams exclaimed, aghast.

“Yeah I can, cause this adult is a liar and a murderer who killed our uncle!”

Rodriguez’s eyes blazed as he barely kept his composure, “You have no proof!”

“Yes we do!” Everyone turned to see Usnavi holding up a suitcase. While everyone had been talking, Usnavi had in fact, snuck back out to the car and taken Rodriguez’s suitcase with all the strange objects in them.

Everyone gathered in the Reptile Room where Usnavi dumped the suitcase’s contents onto John’s desk.

“What is all this?” Adams asked.

“Stuff in Stephano’s suitcase,” Usnavi answered, picking out the strange objects he found.

“He broke into it,” Rodriguez said bitterly.

“Usnavi, I expected better from you,” Adams exclaimed. “Nice people like you aren’t supposed to break into other people’s suitcases.”

“It was an emergency,” Usnavi said impatiently.

“If you’re done stereotyping, listen to my cousin, please,” Sonny added.

“Right off the bat, we knew that Stephano had killed Uncle John, we just didn’t know how,” Usnavi said. “But after looking at all this, it all came together, literally and figuratively.” Usnavi took the opera glasses and stuck the two empty syringes in them and added a few more of the trinkets in the suitcase, making a strange dual pumping device.

“What is that thing?” Adams asked.

“I wasn’t quite sure either, until I found this.” Usnavi held up the empty venom bottle. “Uncle John told us that he has a whole cabinet full of venomous samples.” Usnavi said.

“Ranging from ‘slightly irritating’ to ‘dead before you hit the ground’.” Sonny added, quoting their late uncle exactly.

Usnavi shot him a smile and pointed to the venom cabinet, “If you look in there, I think you’ll find that a venom sample is missing.”

Adams took the initiative and opened the cabinet, his eyes growing wide as Usnavi was right. “There is an empty spot!” He exclaimed. “Labeled Mamba Du Mal.”

Sonny quickly flipped through the notebook, his finger hitting the page, “Yep, the Mamba Du Mal is one of the deadliest snakes in the hemisphere,” He read. “And it’s known for its powerful venom.”

“Then it’s obvious,” Rodriguez said. “The Mamba Du Mal broke out of its cage, stole a vial of its own venom, and murdered Doctor Laurens.”

Usnavi and Sonny gave him a look, both of them raising their eyebrows, “That’s pushing it, even for you.” Sonny commented.

“He’s right, that’s ridiculous.” Adams agreed.

“But the bite marks-”

“Aren’t bite marks.” Usnavi cut him off, placing the empty venom bottle upside down on the top of the contraption. Were the bottle still full, it would have easily filled both syringes, ready to inject into an unfortunate victim. “Stephano used this to simulate a snake bite.”

“Very clever.” The Hairy Man nodded.

“Very smart.” The Tattooed Man agreed.

“But what motive could I possibly have to kill Doctor Laurens?” Rodriguez asked.

“Because you’re after our fortune.” Usnavi answered easily.

“How would he even know about the fortune?” Adams asked.

“Because he’s not Stephano at all,” Sonny said dangerously. “He’s Count Rodriguez.”

At that moment, Chip darted forward and ran his tongue along Rodriguez’s ankle, quickly before the man jumped away in shock. Everyone’s gaze was drawn down to his ankle where the faint tattoo of an eye could be seen.

“That tattoo…the same one as Count Rodriguez!” Adams exclaimed in shock.

“I never thought I’d be happy to see that thing.” Sonny remarked.

Rodriguez smirked and slowly clapped, “Well done, boys.” He said, finally dropping his fake voice. “Yes, I killed John Laurens, I admit it.” He looked at Adams, “but what exactly are you going to do about it?”

“I’m going to send you to jail for a very long time.” Adams said firmly. “Officer, arrest this man!”

None of the authorities moved and smirks came to their faces. Adams put the pieces together quite quickly after that.

“Now, if you don’t mind,” Usnavi and Sonny cried out as they were grabbed by Rodriguez’s henchmen, their arms pinned painfully behind them. “I’ll be taking the De la Vegas with me, to Puerto Rico.”

Adams could do nothing but watch while the family began to struggle. Usnavi and Sonny pulled and kicked as they were roughly pulled towards the door.

“No!” Usnavi yelled.

“Let go!” Sonny yelled.

“Shut your trap!” The Hairy Man tangled his long nails in Sonny’s curls, eliciting a yelp from the boy.

“Hey!” Usnavi stomped on the foot if his captor and made his way towards his cousin, “Leave him alone!” Usnavi was only able to grip Sonny’s arm for a second before the One-Eyed Man yanked him away, pinning his arms behind him again in a painful iron grip.

“Navi!” Sonny struggled as the Hairy Man trapped him in a tight headlock while the Tattooed Man grabbed his legs, easily getting him off the ground.

Suddenly, a loud hiss rang through the air. Normally, a hiss would be difficult to hear, especially during a large commotion as this. This one in particular was audible, because it had not just come from one snake, but from many. Rodriguez as his troupe all stopped in their tracks as they realized they were being watched.

If you hadn’t noticed, Chip had been roaming freely around the Reptile Room until he was called to action to reveal the tattoo. Being a dog, who can easily become bored, Chip had busied himself with the other non-venomous reptiles, as in opening their cages and tanks so they could play. This means, that the reptiles were all out of their cages and sensing that their newest friends were in danger.

The henchmen all loosened their grip on the two cousins as they quickly found themselves surrounded by snakes, turtles, and iguanas. Now while these reptiles were all non-venomous, they were still very threatening. Even the gentlest creature has some kind of trick up its sleeve.

With a loud screech from the Screeching Iguana, the reptiles began to close in. The henchman and Rodriguez all cried out in either fear or disgust as they released the cousins and ran out of the house. Usnavi helped Sonny to his feet, as he had been unceremoniously dropped to the ground and the family of three all hurried to the door just in time to see their large van drive away.

Sonny turned on Adams, “What are you waiting for? Go after them!”

“Don’t be ridiculous, a grown man doesn’t participate in car chases,” Adams said sternly. “I’ll call the police, I’m sure they can set up a roadblock or something.”

The De la Vega’s watched helplessly as Adams disappeared back into the house; Rodriguez had gotten away yet again, quite literally with murder. All they could do was go back inside and wait.

The three sat in their bedroom, packing the rest of their belongings for a good while, dozing off for a good while until they heard a small sound. Chip heard it first, having the best hearing, being a dog, and alerted his two humans.

“What’s wrong, boy?” Sonny asked through a yawn.

 _‘Someone’s throwing rocks.’_ Chip snuffed.

The two cousins looked up just in time to see a small pebble hit their window. Curious, they crept to the window and warily looked out, on the lookout in case it was Rodriguez. But it wasn’t; it was a man with long black hair tied into a ponytail. Curious, they opened the window.

“De la Vegas!” The man called.

“How do you know our names?” Sonny asked with a suspicious frown.

“Come down, I’ll explain everything!” The man responded. “I’m a friend of your uncle’s!”

While the two cousins were still wary, anything having to do with their late uncle was reason enough for them to meet him behind the house in the hedge maze.

“My name is Alex,” The man introduced himself. “Your Uncle John was a very good friend of mine.”

Sonny blinked in recognition, “Uncle John mentioned you…said he was gonna record that prank with the Incredibly Deadly Viper for you…”

Alex’s face became drawn with sympathy and sorrow, “I’m so sorry I couldn’t do anything to help him.” He said. “But I swear, I’ll everything I can to bring Rodriguez down.”

The family nodded grimly, when Sonny spied something poking out of Alex’s pocket. “Is that…?”

Alex pulled it out, revealing a spyglass, “Do you still have yours?”

Sonny nodded and pulled his burned one out of his pocket.

Alex nodded, “I’ll have to get John’s from the house later,” He muttered.

“What is that thing?” Usnavi asked, gesturing to the spyglass. “Why do you and John have one? What was he going to tell us in Puerto Rico?”

“Those are all great questions Usnavi, and there are answers to them, but I can’t tell you them now,” Alex said. “And in the meantime, forget about Puerto Rico; it’s been compromised.”

Compromised is a wonderful word but has a very opposite double meaning. On one hand, it can mean that a dispute has been settled. But on the other hand, it can mean that something has been put in great danger and has become too risky.

“Then, what are we supposed to do now?” Sonny asked.

“Keep that spyglass safe, for one.” Alex said. “And do your very best to stay out of Rodriguez’s clutches; your next guardian will be able to keep you safe.”

“You know our next guardian?” Usnavi asked.

Alex nodded, a fond smile on his face, “Your Aunt Peggy may not look like it, but she can be one tough gal,” He said. “Now I have to go; Rodriguez and his lackeys aren’t going to track themselves.” He turned to head deeper into the maze, “Good luck, De la Vegas.” And with that, he vanished.

While this onslaught of information was very useful, it still left the De la Vegas reeling. Their poor heads were now flooded with even more questions that they had no answers to. They exited the maze to find a large van parked outside the front door, with men and women exiting and entering the house carrying large tanks of cages carrying some very familiar reptiles. Chip let out a few frantic barks and they ran over.

“What’s going on?” Usnavi asked Adams as he exited the door.

“Oh, I gave the Herpatological society a call and they agreed to take custody of Dr. Laurens’ reptiles.”

“Take them where?” Sonny asked.

“Well, they’re orphans now, so they’re going to be put in the care of zoos, labs, and other herpetologists.” Adams responded.

“Can we at least say goodbye?” Usnavi asked with slight urgency. After everything they had been through, the last of what they considered family was already being taken away before their very eyes.

Adams chuckled, “I would think after everything you went through you’d never want to see a snake again.”

But Adams, as usual, was very wrong, as Chip spotted a large cage carrying a large black snake, _‘Viper!’_ He barked. He hurried up to the cage as it was placed last in the truck among the other reptiles.

“Hey!” A worker exclaimed as Chip leaned on the truck opening with his front paws.

“It’s okay!” Sonny said quickly. “Our dog is friends with that snake!”

Chip whined as he poked his nose through the bars, allowing the snake to nuzzle it affectionately. The two cousins joined their dog and spied their other reptilian friends all mournfully calling out to them. Sonny placed his hands on the tank holding the Emerald Boa, while Usnavi slid his fingers through the cages of the Screeching Iguana and Winged Lizard, stroking their scales for the last time.

“We’re gonna miss you guys…” Sonny said sadly, a lump coming to his throat.

“Be good, okay?” Usnavi said, his voice cracking.

 _‘Don’t you dare forget about us,’_ Chip whimpered.

Even the reptiles all seemed to be crying as they pressed themselves against the bars and glass of their containers, spending their last moments in close proximity of the De la Vegas. Unfortunately, this touching scene only lasted a few moments before the workers and Adams ushered them away and shut the back doors of the van before it started up.

Usnavi and Sonny couldn’t help but wave and call goodbye as the van began to move, barely catching glimpses of their reptile family through the tinted windows. Chip let out a soft but mournful howl, pained by the loss of his dear friend, the Incredibly Deadly Viper.

The De la Vegas continued waving to the van, tears in their eyes, as it drove out of the driveway and out of sight, taking the last of their Uncle John’s legacy away forever.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Finally, on to Book 3! I'll try to write a bunch of that and post two or three chapters of the next part all at once when I get to it.


	13. 3.1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which the De la Vegas are brought to their newest guardian, who is quite different from their Uncle John.

Usnavi and Sonny stared off the railing of the Fickle Ferry at the slow-moving waves of the Lake Lachrymose. Chip lay on the ground at their feet, his keen eyesight spotting small fish swimming about the murky waters.

Now, if you knew nothing about the De la Vega’s recent history, being on a ferry sailing across a lake would seem like a fun adventure. But sadly, you would also be very wrong, as the family of three were simply traveling with Mr. Adams to their next guardian. But, as is usual of the poor De la Vega’s, they were heading right for a storm of disaster, wrought with cloudbursts of unhappiness, blizzards of despair, cold fronts of misery, and attacks of allergies. And unfortunately, they would also be greeted with a devastating hurricane lurking just off the map.

The ferry arrived at Damocles Dock and the family disembarked, laying eyes on the dreary town before them. The cloudy sky seemed to emphasize the emptiness of the little town, hitting the family with a wave of unpleasantness and sorrow.

“What a quaint little place,” Adams commented. “Quaint means-”

“We know what it means,” Sonny cut him off as politely as he could.

Luckily, Adams didn’t seem to notice, “Now, I know you three are particularly troubled by that man, Count, uh, something.”

“Rodriguez,” Usnavi finished.

“Ah, yes, Rodriguez,” Adams said wistfully. “Who knows where such a terrible man came from?”

“You put us in his care.” Sonny said flatly.

“I wouldn’t exactly call it ‘care’,” Adams said. “He’s a thief and a murderer and wants to steal your fortune.”

 _‘What’s with this guy thinking young people are morons?’_ Chip barked.

“Well,” Adams checked his watch, “I’m afraid this is where I must leave you.” He took out a few dollars and handed them to Usnavi, “This should cover the taxi fee to Peggy Schuyler’s house.”

“She’s not coming to meet us?” Usnavi asked.

Adams shook his head, “No; she informed me that she didn’t think it safe to meet you here and I didn’t think it polite to ask why.” He frowned lightly, “She’s a very strange woman; she seemed very paranoid when I met her.”

“Why would she be paranoid?” Sonny asked.

“I don’t know,” Adams shrugged, “It may have something to do with her husband’s recent death or the disappearance of her sister; but enough of that, I’m sure you’ll figure it out when you get there.”

The De la Vegas shared a look, as Adams wasn’t the best when it came to proper subject changes. The man never seemed to focus on the right thing at the moment. “Now, as you know, you can always call me if there are any problems, and I will be keeping in touch regularly,” Adams said, when he blinked. “Oh, I almost forgot; I have a treat for you while you travel.”

Adams went through his pockets and held up a clear plastic bag that contained three small aqua colored candies. “It’s oyster flavored candy; apparently, this town is famous for it.” Sonny’s eyes widened and he snatched the bag, stepping away from Usnavi.

 _“Gracias,”_ Usnavi said, keeping a poker face.

“You’re welcome,” Adams said. “Now, if you’ll excuse me, the bank awaits; farewell De la Vegas!” The two cousins waved weakly as Adams boarded the ferry once again. By this point, the De la Vegas were a touch happy that Adams was leaving them early. If you haven’t figured out, Mr. Adams is not the most reliable person to have around during terrible matters such as these.

“Why didn’t you tell him you’re allergic to shellfish?” Sonny asked Usnavi, making a point to keep the bag of oyster candy far away from his cousin.

Usnavi shrugged, “It didn’t seem important,” He said. “Especially compared to everything else that’s been happening.”

Sonny gave him a look saying he had a point and threw the bag into a nearby trashcan. “I just hope this Aunt Peggy can explain all this to us.”

 _‘Ditto,’_ Chip sneezed.

Usnavi and Sonny hugged themselves and stepped closer to each other as they scanned around for a taxi; the dreary air seemed to carry a bitter cold with it, biting at their skin, and making them wish that they had changed into something warmer before coming here. The three quickly hailed a cab (it was quite easy as there was only one taxi, driving loops around the small town) and they piled in. They deflated as the taxi was infinitely warmer than the outside.

As the taxi drove, they took in the town that was to be their new home. As mentioned before, it was quite small and only a few stores were open, while the rest seemed closed. “This place sure is empty,” Sonny commented.

“It’s the Off-Season,” The cab driver responded. “When the weather’s nice, this place gets as crowded as can be.”

“Do the people here all know each other?” Usnavi asked, watching as they passed two shopkeepers talking to one another.

“Not counting the tourists, yeah, pretty much.” The cab driver shrugged. Usnavi and Sonny shared a small smile; the little town reminded them greatly of their old home in the barrio. They certainly looked forward to feeling the warmth that came with a close-knit community. The cab driver took a sharp turn and began driving up a winding path along a cliff, overlooking the lake. Sonny couldn’t help but scoot slightly away from the window as the sheer depth of the drop that was mere inches away was quite frightening.

“Your Aunt Peggy must be pretty brave to live all the way up here,” The cab driver commented.

“Well, we wouldn’t know,” Usnavi said with a small smile, “We’ve never met her.”

“I think I get why she didn’t come down to meet us,” Sonny remarked, still staring at the drop. “I wouldn’t want to travel along this road more than once.”

“Well, you might have to,” The cab driver said. “Unless you have enough food and supplies at your aunt’s house, you’re gonna have to get to town quick.”

“Why’s that?” Usnavi asked.

“Cause Hurricane Herman’s set to arrive tomorrow night; supposed to be a doozy.”

Sonny frowned, “I thought hurricanes only happened near the ocean.”

“With a lake as big as this one, anything can happen.” The cab driver responded. Chip lay his head down on his front paws with an uneasy whine, and Sonny scratched the dog’s ears.

After a good while, the cab pulled up to a large wooden house, though its location was quite a sight to see. The house overlooked the entire lake, but that also meant that it was resting on the very edge of a cliff. But even worse than that, the house wasn’t even fully on the cliff, as multiple wooden poles created a web of supports below the house and down a three hundred foot drop to the freezing waters of Lake Lachrymose.

The De la Vega’s couldn’t help but stare at the sight; Alex had said that Peggy was ‘quite a gal’, and she certainly had to be to live somewhere like this by herself. The cab driver unpacked their suitcases and bid them farewell, leaving the De la Vega’s to approach the front door. The family of three all glanced at each other; behind this door was their next guardian. What would their Aunt Peggy be like? There was only one way to find out.

“Ready?” Usnavi asked.

“Yeah,” Sonny nodded, along with Chip.

Usnavi raised his hand and knocked on the door. Silence answered them; no one answered the door. There wasn’t even any noise from the other side. The family shared a confused frown; was she not home? Usnavi knocked on the door again, but only once before a slot on the door slid open, causing them to jump back.

“Who’s there?!” The harsh voice demanded as one eye glared out at them through the slot. “State your purpose!”

Usnavi and Sonny looked at each other with wide eyes before Usnavi decided to speak, “Uh…we’re looking for our Aunt Peggy?” He tried. “We’re the-”

“The De la Vega’s!” The voice said joyfully. The door slot closed instantly and the sound of multiple locks unlocking could be heard before the door opened, revealing a woman. She was had light brown skin and long curly brown hair in a ponytail, wearing a yellow sweater and a pair of jeans. “Usnavi, Sonny, and Chip!” She exclaimed with a smile. “You made it in one piece!”

“So…” Sonny said slowly, “You’re-”

“I’m your Aunt Peggy,” The woman replied with a nod, “Quick, get in!” She ushered the three inside and shut the door behind them. They turned around to see her locking all the locks again.

“That’s a lot of locks,” Sonny commented a bit awkwardly.

“You can never be too careful,” Peggy responded. The two cousins shared a glance, but shrugged nonetheless as Peggy was right; there was nothing wrong with having multiple locks on one’s door. Some people just feel safer that way.

They took the opportunity to take in the house; it was very simple, unlike Uncle John’s place, and very dull in color and tone as there was only white paint on the walls. There was a kitchenette next to a table and chairs, a living room to the right of the front door, and a staircase. There was also a large closed door right across from the front door, but the cousins were drawn away from the appearance of the house by the chilly draft. None of the windows were open, yet the chill from outside seemed to seep in through the walls.

“So!” Peggy faced the family after she finished locking the door. “This is my home; it’s not much, but I manage.”

“Yeah, it’s…cozy.” Usnavi tried.

Peggy gave him a look, “You don’t have to do that, I know it’s a freezer in here.” She said. “But it’s for a good cause, trust me.”

“What good cause?” Sonny asked.

“This place is made almost completely of wood,” Peggy said, tapping the railing of the staircase. “If someone came in here, they could easily knock a heater over and set the place on fire! You never know!”

Usnavi and Sonny exchanged a glance. “I…guess that makes sense,” Usnavi remarked. It did make a little sense, as useful devices such as heaters and food processors can indeed be safety hazards.

“Has that happened before?” Sonny asked.

“No, but I’m not taking any chances!” Peggy said.

 _‘Oh boy,’_ Chip whined.

“Now, why don’t we take your things upstairs to your rooms?” Peggy offered.

The De la Vegas followed their aunt up the rickety stairs and Sonny traced the large cracks in the walls, “What happened to the walls?”

“I tore out all the wires in my house,” Peggy said as if it was no big deal.

“Why?” Sonny asked slowly, almost afraid of the answer. “I don’t want any wire taps or bugs in my house; you never know who might be watching.” She blinked, “Oh yeah, that means I don’t use the phone here, just to warn you.”

“I…don’t think anyone would be able to put wire taps in your house without you noticing.” Sonny said slowly.

“But there might be someone out there who’s capable of doing that,” Peggy shot back.

 _‘Wow…’_ Chip barked softly, as Usnavi and Sonny exchanged a troubled gaze. Let’s just say, the De la Vega’s now understood what Mr. Adams meant when he said Peggy seemed paranoid.

They were led to a small little room. Unlike Uncle John’s place, it had no carpet on the floor and the walls weren’t painted any particular color to feel warm and welcoming. But there were two beds and a decent sized dresser, so that was enough to satisfy the little family. However, one thing that stuck out was the large piles of cans stacked near the windows.

“What are these cans for?” Sonny asked.

“It’s my little alarm system,” Peggy answered. “Since I don’t trust, or have, my electrical alarm, I set these up so if someone tries to sneak in, the cans will fall over, so if we’re asleep or awake, we’ll know if someone’s in the house.”

“Like who?” Usnavi asked.

“There are dangerous people in this world, boys,” Peggy said lowly. “As far as I’m concerned you can’t trust anyone or anything, except for your own family.”

 _‘Is she for real?’_ Chip barked.

“Chip, be nice,” Usnavi admonished. Peggy frowned lightly, “Did you know what he was saying?” She asked.

“Yeah; we’ve been able to for a while,” Usnavi said.

“How do you do it?” Peggy asked eagerly. “I consider myself and my family an expert on the English language and I can’t understand a word!”

Sonny exchanged a glance with Usnavi before shrugging, “We don’t really know how it works, it just kinda…happens.” He tried.

Peggy lit up, “Well then, you’re in the right place for more reasons than one!” She exclaimed. “I’ll leave you to unpack, and meet me downstairs when you’re done!” And she left them to their own devices. It didn’t take them long to unpack, they had so little to begin with, and they met their aunt back downstairs.

Once together, Peggy led them to a set of double doors directly across a small hallway from the front door. “Now, I know you’ve seen many strange things.” She said.

“We have.” Usnavi nodded.

“And you must have many questions.” Peggy continued.

“Tons of questions,” Sonny agreed.

Peggy smiled, “Well, in my library, you’ll find all the answers you need.” She turned around, opened the door, and led them inside a brightly lit sundeck. The far wall was a giant window that overlooked the whole lake, allowing as much light in as possible, and there were many shelves lined with books, along with a couch and chair to sit on. There was also a human sized statue in the corner and a map on the wall in another corner, mostly for aesthetic or decoration purposes. The family all entered the room and Chip went ahead and jumped onto the couch to lie down.

“Wow…” Sonny breathed.

“Is that the whole lake?” Usnavi asked, gesturing to the window.

“Yep,” Peggy nodded, walking up to it. “I know every island on its waters and every cavern on its shores.”

“You’ve been to them all?” Sonny asked in astonishment.

“Yep; those were the days…” Peggy sighed before her smile faded. “But now I can only look at it from far away…because I’m too haunted by the past.”

“Does it have anything to do with my parents?” Usnavi asked.

“Oh no,” Peggy shook her head. “It has more to do with my husband, Stephen, and my dear older sister, Angelica.” She turned and gestured to a painted picture of a fairy handsome man. “Stephen was such a brave man; he was a retired general, but his training, loyalty, and love for crackers carried over to our family.”

“Did Tia Luz and Tio Luis know him?” Sonny asked.

“They sure did,” Peggy said. “My sisters, Stephen, your parents, and myself would always gather on the shores for picnics and to develop secret codes!” The cousins blinked in surprise; first the whole piano thing with Uncle John and now they developed secret codes?

Peggy sighed, “I remember our last picnic; my sisters and I were discussing Angelica’s latest ideas on women’s rights and Stephen wanted to go swimming right when we finished lunch. I warned him to wait an hour after eating before getting in the water…but he only waited forty-five minutes and…” She lowered her head, her smile vanishing once again.

“Did he drown?” Sonny asked.

“No; worse,” Peggy said. “He was eaten.”

Usnavi frowned in concern, “Eaten by what?” He asked slowly.

“The Lachrymose Leeches; they’re like normal leeches but a hundred times worse!” Peggy answered, her face becoming tight. “A big part of the lake is a breeding ground for them. They’re usually harmless, but if they smell food, they will attack without any mercy!”

Sonny made a face, “But they’re just leeches,” He remarked.

Peggy waved her finger, “These are no ordinary leeches, Sonny; each one has seven rows of sharp teeth and a tiny pointed nose that can smell anything from far away.” She sighed sadly, “So many people have died to those leeches, including my poor husband. And after he died, Angelica disappeared and I just…” Peggy shook her head like she was keeping tears back. “I haven’t been able to trust anyone since.”

An uncomfortable silence followed; it’s not a common occurrence for family members to share such tragic stories, especially after meeting for the first time.

“We’re sorry for bringing it up,” Usnavi said.

Peggy shook her head, “All the better that you know now,” She said. “What better way to keep you three out of danger than by sharing past experiences of danger?”

Sonny cleared his throat, “Aunt Peggy, you said you had answers for us,” He said. While the younger De la Vega had been listening to his Aunt, he had been getting impatient on what she had initially promised them.

Luckily, Peggy seemed glad for the subject change, “Yes; right over here.” She led them to a portion of the wall where a large safe was embedded in it under the portrait of Stephen. However, Peggy made the point to move between the cousins and the safe, “Now, I may have told you that you would get answers, and you will,” She said. “But answers are only the safest when you discover them for yourself.”

 _‘Oh no…’_ Chip whined.

“Why can’t you just tell us?” Sonny asked, almost desperately.

“Because you never know who might be listening!” Peggy exclaimed in a hushed voice. “It’s much safer if you quietly figure out what you need to know on your own,” She smirked. “And, call this a test; if you figure it out, then I’ll know for sure that I can trust you with something as big as this.”

“I thought you said that the only people you can trust was family,” Usnavi said.

“Trust has many different meanings and grammatical applications, Usnavi,” Peggy said. “Which reminds me…” She reached over and pulled an extra bookcase out from behind one of the shelves, making it cover the safe and Stephen’s portrait.

“The search for answers starts here,” She gestured to the bookshelf. “In my sister’s collection of grammar books, as well as the other book sin here. Now that you live here, you can look through them all to your heart’s content.”

Usnavi and Sonny exchanged a troubled glance, unsure of how to feel. While their aunt wasn’t going to give them the answers directly, she hadn’t forbidden them from finding out about them. It was a strange mixture of satisfaction and dissatisfaction now swirling within them, even as Peggy ushered them out of the library so they could have dinner.

Their new life with their new guardian had certainly started out in an unexpected way; but only time would tell if it was a fortunate, or unfortunate thing to occur.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Like John, Peggy fit this character in one certain regard X(
> 
> I decided to make her more paranoid than afraid; there IS a difference, and I think it fit her personality more (or at least, the personality than the fandom has given her)
> 
> And yes, my new headcanon is that Usnavi is allergic to shellfish.


	14. 3.2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which the De la Vegas learn more about their family and their aunt, while more unfortunate events prepare to unfold.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the wait! I'll try to get back to this one as best I can!

That night, Peggy cooked them warm soup for dinner, a delicacy that the De la Vega’s hadn’t had in a good while. As they ate, they tried to ask her questions about what they wanted to know, but their aunt expertly avoided giving them answers by giving them vague statements such as ‘You’ll soon find out.’ Or ‘All the answers are right in front of you.’.

It also didn’t help that Peggy was adamant about not letting them see what was in the safe, as they had to ‘earn their privilege’ to even open the damn thing. It also didn’t help that she refused to tell them any details about Usnavi’s parents or their Uncle John. “I don’t talk about that,” She always said.

“You don’t talk about it, or you won’t talk about it?” Sonny eventually asked back.

To his credit, he got his Aunt to think of a proper response this time, but it still led nowhere, “This is one of those rare grammatical instances where ‘don’t’ and ‘won’t’ mean the same thing, so yes to both.”

Usnavi once suggested moving to a different home, to escape the bad memories the lake held, but Peggy’s paranoia brought them to yet another halt. “What if the new place we move to has suspicious neighbors? What if the house we buy has a bigger price than we can afford? What if we can’t find a home at all?” The list continued for quite some time and it became clear that Aunt Peggy wasn’t going to give them what they wanted so easily. The cousins were going to have to do what she said, and that was to find the answers themselves.

The next day, the family ate a lunch of pasta and red sauce with cheese (that Chip happily shredded for them), with candles lit on the table to provide some warmth. It was the only kind of warmth Peggy allowed in the house, but it was better than nothing, as the De la Vega’s thickest clothes weren’t enough to protect them from the chilly house.

“You’ll have to remind me next time to make you one of my favorite recipes,” Peggy was saying. “It’s one I learned in Egypt when I was employed as a Snake Charmer.”

“You’ve been to Egypt?” Sonny asked in awe. It was a rare occasion when Peggy would willingly tell them of her past when she was more reckless and risky. Like rare gemstones, they were always a delight. However, they all seemed to end the same way.

“Yes, those were great times; but now I’ve leaned something even more important now.”

“What’s that?” Sonny asked, though he suspected the answer already.

“That the world is a very dangerous place and you can’t trust anybody,” Peggy said. “Because the moment you do, they strike when your guard is down, and there’s hardly ever a way to recover after a blow like that.”

 _‘She needs help,’_ Chip whined, lying under the table.

Usnavi then cleared his throat, “Aunt Peggy, are we prepared for Hurricane Herman?” He asked.

“Hurricane?” Peggy asked.

“The taxi driver told us yesterday that a big hurricane was heading this way, tomorrow night,” Sonny answered. “Even though a hurricane shouldn’t happen here.” He muttered that last part, as he was still confused at how this was possible.

“Oh, shit!” Peggy leapt to her feet. “We’re gonna need lots of food and supplies! We need to make sure the house is protected! Why didn’t you tell me earlier?!”

“It just slipped our minds?” Sonny tried. “Well, at least we still have time,” Peggy said. “C’mon, we should all head to town, now!”

“Maybe Usnavi and I could stay here and watch the house,” Sonny offered quickly. “Make sure nothing happens while you’re gone.”

“Good point.” Peggy agreed. “You never know what could happen in a small town; ever read Thornton Wilder or Stephen King? For all we know, the whole town could be against us!” That was enough to get their aunt out of the house as she put on her coat and headed for the door.

“I won’t be long, boys!” Peggy said as they remained in the kitchen. “If you get hungry again just cook whatever you can find!”

“Okay!” Sonny responded.

“And remember, keep the door locked and don’t answer it for anyone!”

“Except you, Aunt Peggy!” Usnavi answered.

“Exactly! Don’t do anything I wouldn’t do!” And with that, their aunt left the house. They waited in silence for a good few minutes, making sure Aunt Peggy was really gone, before exchanging a look.

“Shall we?” Sonny asked.

Usnavi smiled, “We shall.” They put their dishes up, blew out the candles, and headed straight for the library. They pulled back the secret shelf and laid eyes on the safe, sitting in front of it. They then saw that the safe was digital, and seven empty spaces were above the keypad.

“Okay, how can we open this thing?” Usnavi wondered out loud.

“Most combinations use three numbers,” Sonny said. “But with seven, the combination could be anything.”

“That would probably mean it would have to be a number she’d remember,” Usnavi agreed. “But Aunt Peggy wouldn’t just memorize a random combination, it would have to mean something.”

“Sometimes numbers can substitute for words, literally and figuratively,” Sonny pointed out. “You know, like those kids at school who type ‘boobies’ in their calculators.” That comment earned an eyeroll from his cousin.

“She did say that my parents and her developed secret codes,” Usnavi added.

“So, it would have to be a word she’d remember, or care about.” Sonny finished. “But…what does Aunt Peggy care about?”

“Burglar safety?” Usnavi tried.

“Being vague?” Sonny couldn't help but remark.

 _‘Stephen,’_ Chip barked.

“That’s seven letters,” Usnavi said, both of them turning to the portrait of Stephen above the safe. They quickly crowded around the safe and Sonny punched in the proper numbers. There was a click, and Sonny turned the handle, opening the safe. They weren’t sure what they were expecting, but inside was a small pile of belongings.

On top of the pile was a large tin with the name Lake Lachrymose on the lid, probably a souvenir from the town. Sonny pulled out the tin and opened it, revealing it to be full of crackers. _‘Dibs.’_ Chip barked.

Sonny snorted and put the lid back on, “Save it for the hurricane, mister,” He sniped.

Usnavi pulled out the next few objects, which were pieces of paper, full of writing. Usnavi squinted at the title of the first one, “Put Women in the Sequel,” He read. “They’re essays on women’s rights.”

“Those must be her sister’s,” Sonny agreed. He then pulled out the last of the pile, which were a bunch of old photos, many of them containing Peggy, John, and a bunch of faces they didn’t recognize, doing a multitude of activities.

“Look at her,” Usnavi mused, gazing at a picture of Peggy rock climbing, “She looks so happy; and she’s taking risks!”

“And look!” Sonny exclaimed, pulling out another picture of Peggy smiling at a table with someone they recognized.

“Is that Alex?” Usnavi asked.

“Uncle John’s friend from the hedge maze,” Sonny confirmed.

The more they looked through them, one photo seemed to stand out the most; it was Peggy, standing with two other girls around her age. One had dark skin and long curly black hair like Peggy’s only it was down, and the other was fairer skinned, with long straight black hair that reached her back. They were all smirking with confidence and snapping their fingers in the air, giving off the air that they were ready and willing to do anything.

Usnavi turned the photo over where words were scrawled: ‘The Schuyler Sisters – Ready to go to work!’

“Those are Aunt Peggy’s sisters!” Sonny exclaimed.

Usnavi nodded, “And one of them went missing,” He added.

Sonny studied the photo, “They don’t look like people you’d want to mess with; I wonder what happened?” The rest of the question hung in the air: what happened to make Aunt Peggy so distrustful?

Their thoughts were interrupted when they heard the front door open. “De la Vegas?” Aunt Peggy called. The two cousins scrambled, putting the pictures and crackers back into the safe and pulling the secret shelf out once again. They then each grabbed a random book and sat on the couch, opening the books to make it look like they were reading.

“In here, Aunt Peggy!” Sonny called.

A few moments later, Peggy entered the room, carrying two bags of groceries. “Already making use of my resources I see,” She commented. “I got plenty of food for us; should last us a good week or so; but that’s not all.” Peggy paused and took a deep breath, “We need to talk; about something important.”

Usnavi and Sonny put their books aside, “What is it?” Usnavi asked.

Peggy pulled up a chair and sat down across from them. “Okay, I know that I’m not what you expected,” She said. “Ever since my husband died and my sister disappeared, I just couldn’t bring myself to trust anyone.” She smiled, “But then you three came along, and I felt a spark I hadn’t felt in a long time; a spark that reminded me of your parents.”

“My parents?” Usnavi asked, perking up slightly.

Peggy nodded, “Your parents and I were more than friends, we were comrades, men and women in arms; we trusted each other with our lives.”

“Uncle John said the same thing,” Sonny commented.

Peggy’s face fell, and she sighed sadly, “Poor, poor John; you must miss him and your parents very much.” She shook her head. “The death of a loved one is the worst feeling; it’s like climbing a flight of stairs in the dark, thinking that there’s one more stair…but your foot falls through the air and you get this moment of dark surprise.”

Usnavi and Sonny’s faces became drawn with sadness; that is indeed exactly what it felt like. Only those who experienced loss like them could possibly understand the true feeling.

“After something like that, you can’t help but feel like the world is against you,” Peggy went on. “But today, I realized that if the world is against you, it’s better to fight it rather than run and hide.” She reached out and gently gripped Usnavi and Sonny’s hands, “Now that it’s my job to keep you safe, I think I’m ready to take risks again.”

“Really?” Sonny asked, lighting up.

Peggy nodded, “And in order to do that, I just need to ask one favor,” She said, suddenly lowering her voice. “I’m going to need you to trust me, no matter what happens tonight,” Peggy leaned forward, prompting the De la Vegas to do the same. “And no matter who comes through that door.” She whispered.

Before the De la Vegas could ask what she meant, Peggy got up and opened the door to the library. “In here, Captain!” She called.

“I’m hobbling as fast as I can, Peggy!” A voice responded, that sounded strange, but eerily familiar.

Usnavi and Sonny stood up while Chip’s fur stood on end, as a figure entered the library. He had grey hair with large sideburns, wore a sea captain’s outfit, and had a peg leg and pipe. And I say he wore an outfit, because it was clear to the De la Vegas to make them take a step back and freeze in horror. It was Count Rodriguez.


	15. 3.3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which a very unwelcome face presents himself once again to the poor De la Vegas.

The two cousins stepped closer together as Rodriguez grinned at them, “Good evening,” He greeted with a nod. “My name is Captain Sham, and my home is the sea.”

“No, it’s not,” Usnavi softly, shaking his head.

“Fine then; it’s a large lake,” Rodriguez said. “A pleasure to make your acquaintance.”

“We’ve already made your acquaintance,” Sonny said shakily. “You’re Count Rodriguez!”

Peggy gave them a look while Rodriguez feigned confusion, “Who is this Count Rodriguez?” He asked. “He sounds handsome.”

“Now boys, this is hardly the time to say such ridiculous things,” Peggy said quickly, seemingly glaring at them. Unfortunately for the De la Vegas, they found it difficult to come up with the proper argument to make against the man. Rodriguez’s tattooed ankle had been replaced with the peg leg, and the eyepatch and hat covered any other obvious facial cues the man had.

“How?” Usnavi asked. “How did you find us?”

“I didn’t find you, I found Peggy,” Rodriguez said.

“We met while I was shopping,” Peggy carried on from there. “I noticed that his business cards had a grammatical error, and that’s when things became clear.” They barely noticed that Peggy slightly stressed those last three words.

“I still don’t understand the problem with them,” Rodriguez muttered.

“I told you many times,” Peggy said. “You spelled ‘its’ with an apostrophe, which means ‘it is’; you understand what I’m saying, don’t you De la Vegas?”

“Of course they do. After all, these two certainly don’t seem like the stupid type,” Rodriguez said, before the cousins could answer. “They’re good and obedient little orphans.” Usnavi gripped Sonny’s hand tightly as they both glared at him. “Perhaps one day I could take them on a boat ride far away from here,” Rodriguez growled, forcing Usnavi to subtly push Sonny behind him.

Chip barked very loudly. _‘Go to hell!’_

“Merciful waves!” Rodriguez exclaimed. “A wolverine!”

“Chip is a Husky!” Sonny retorted sharply. “You know that!”

“We’ll discuss what kind of wolverine it is later,” Rodriguez said. “In the meantime, the adults have somewhere to be.”

“Where?” Sonny asked.

“Oh, I guess I forgot to tell you; Captain Sham is taking me out to dinner,” Peggy said. “I’m going to stay out late, so you two will have to fend for yourselves for a while.” Usnavi and Sonny’s eyes widened in alarm.

“No, you can’t!” Usnavi protested.

“Yes, I can; I’m a free woman, I can do what I want!” Peggy said before turning to Rodriguez, “Let me go grab my sweater and then we can go.” She hurried out of the room, leaving the family with the evil man.

“So,” Rodriguez drawled out, dropping his fake voice. “Long time no see, eh, De la Vegas?”

“You won’t get away with this,” Usnavi said lowly, as they slowly circled each other until the De la Vegas were by the library entrance.

“Get away with what?” Rodriguez asked innocently. “I’m just a Sea Captain; it says so on my business cards.” He pulled out a few as proof.

“Anyone can make business cards!” Sonny snapped, clinging to Usnavi’s arm as he remained slightly behind his cousin.

Rodriguez frowned, and Chip growled, standing between his humans and the villain before them. “Well, you’re just a never-ending heap of facts, aren’t you Sonny?” Rodriguez said as he began to slowly advance towards them, forcing the family to back into the hallway. “Just constantly talking like you know everything in the world. But none of that knowledge does you any good,” He smiled deviously. “Like poor Uncle John, and Luz and Luis; may they rest in peace. And now it’s time to add more to that list.”

At that moment, Peggy came down the stairs with her jacket, “I’m ready!”

“Aunt Peggy, we need to talk to you!” Sonny said urgently.

“Oh, I’m sure it can wait until we get back,” Rodriguez quickly countered. “We don’t want to be late!”

“Alright, Captain,” Peggy said coming down the rest of the stairs. “I’ll be back soon.” Peggy pulled the De la Vegas into a hug. Usnavi and Sonny didn’t return it, as they were desperately wanting to push Aunt Peggy away and tell her what was happening, but her whispering to them made them freeze. “I know it’s him, don’t worry; you just stay here, and I’ll take care of this.”

Peggy pulled away and headed towards the door with Rodriguez, “Make sure to go to bed early tonight,” She said with a wink. “We’ll want to be ready for the storm tomorrow.”

“Okay,” Sonny said numbly. And with that, the two adults left the De la Vegas in the cold house. With the steps being the closest, Usnavi and Sonny dropped down to sit on them, their minds reeling at what had happened. “He found us again,” Sonny said, his voice still flat with fear and disbelief.

“But Aunt Peggy recognized him,” Usnavi said. “Why didn’t she say so in the first place?”

 _‘Maybe she has a plan?’_ Chip whined.

“Then why didn’t she tell us!” Usnavi protested.

“She said she was ready to take risks again,” Sonny said, remembering their aunt’s earlier speech.

“But this is way too big a risk!” Usnavi exclaimed. “We have to follow them!” They ran to the library and easily found one of Peggy’s many maps of the town.

“There are half a dozen restaurants in this place!” Sonny exclaimed after they examined it. “How are we supposed to narrow it down?”

 _‘Hail a cab?’_ Chip barked.

Usnavi blinked, “The cab…the cab driver must know where he took them!”

“How are we supposed to get to town though?” Sonny asked.

“We’ll just have to walk; come on!” They hurried out the door when headlights blinded them. They stepped back as a suspicious car pulled up in front of the door. The windows rolled down, revealing Rodriguez’s troupe, glaring at them.

“Going somewhere?” The Tattooed Man said.

“Young people shouldn’t be out at this time of night,” The Skinny Lady said.

“Go back in the house,” The One-Eyed Man said.

“Or some strangers might snatch you up and take you away,” The Hairy Man said, his eyes lingering on Sonny for a moment. The De la Vega’s exchanged a few fearful glances and went back inside.

“Now what?” Sonny asked as the ventured down the hall and back into the library. “There’s no other way out!”

“Well, there’s one other way,” Usnavi said, looking at the large window in the library.

“No,” Sonny said instantly. “There’s no way we can get out that way; it’s gotta be a, a five-hundred-foot drop!” They walked over to the window.

“Or…a five-hundred-foot climb,” Usnavi said taking his hat out. “I saw some fishing nets upstairs, I could braid them into a ladder,” He mused, pacing the floor, wringing his hat in his hands.

“But, Usnavi-”

“Then we could break the window and climb down,”

“Usnavi-”

“We’d reach the water-”

“And then what?!” Sonny blurted out loudly.

Usnavi looked at Sonny and sighed, “I don’t know,” He admitted.

“We don’t even know what he’s planning.” Sonny said desperately.

“He probably wants to use Aunt Peggy to get our fortune,” Usnavi said. “He could marry her or try to convince her to sign the fortune over.”

 _‘But Aunt Peggy knows it’s him,’_ Chip barked.

“And when he finds out, he’ll kill her!” Sonny cried, his eyes glassing over. “He killed Uncle John, and there’s a million ways out here for him to kill Aunt Peggy!”

Usnavi started at his cousin’s sudden emotional burst, “Sonny-”

“Maybe Aunt Peggy was right; we can’t trust anybody!” Sonny went on. “No matter where we go, Rodriguez will find us, and no matter who we tell, no one will listen to us!” He walked over and sat down on the couch. “We can’t be safe anywhere,” Sonny put his head in his hands, “…and all our friends and family are dead and they’re not coming back.”

Usnavi felt his own eyes sting as the still clear images of their beloved neighborhood burnt to the ground flashed in his head. He made his way over to the couch and sat next to his shivering cousin.

“C’mere,” Usnavi said softly, putting his arm around Sonny. The younger De la Vega scooted closer to him, draping his legs across Usnavi’s lap, and rested his head on Usnavi’s chest, leaning back on the couch. Chip joined them shortly after, lying on top of both their legs. Usnavi gently stroked Sonny’s curls, taking a deep breath, “I know it feels like the world is against us right now, especially after everything that happened to us,” He said. “But Aunt Peggy recognized him, just like Uncle John did.”

“Yeah, and Uncle John’s dead,” Sonny replied bitterly.

“But Aunt Peggy isn’t,” Usnavi responded. He pulled away slightly and looked down at Sonny’s glassy eyes, “She’s doing this to protect us, just like Uncle John, so we have to protect Aunt Peggy, no matter what.”

Sonny shook his head, still looking at Usnavi, “How are you not scared?”

A small smile came to Usnavi’s face, “Remember what Abuela would tell us when we were scared?”

Sonny’s eyes sparked with remembrance, “Do the scary thing first…”

“…and get scared afterwards.” Usnavi finished. The De la Vega’s stayed on the couch in embrace for a few moments longer before getting up; they had work to do.

“I’ll see what I can find,” Sonny said, getting up and heading towards the bookshelves.

“I’ll work on that ladder,” Usnavi agreed. “Chip, help me out?”

 _‘No problem.’_ Chip barked.

* * *

The De la Vegas ultimately decided to take their activities to their bedroom, just in case their aunt or Rodriguez happened to come back early. Usnavi sat on his bed, Chip by his side, slowly but surely cutting through the multitude of nets they had found. Sonny lay on his bed, perusing the very few books in Peggy’s library about secret codes and messages.

In fact, they were so engrossed in their work, that they failed to hear the front door open. What they did hear, was the loud crash that came a few moments later, which caused them to spring up from their beds.

“What was that?” Sonny asked.

“I don’t know,” Usnavi responded. They opened their door and hurried down the stairs. “Hello?” Usnavi called.

“Aunt Peggy?” Sonny called. The kitchen and living room was empty, but the door to the library wasn’t.

Chip smelled the cool air coming from within and was the first to notice, _‘Uh-oh…’_ he whimpered, rushing into the room before barking. _‘Guys! You might wanna see this!’_

Usnavi and Sonny hurried into the library, but skid to a halt the instant they entered. The front window of the library was completely shattered, and the hole was shaped like a person.

“Oh, Dios mio…” Usnavi whispered in horror. Something then caught Sonny’s eye and he walked over to the side table. A book was placed on it, keeping a note in place on the surface.

Sonny picked up the note and paled in horror, “Aunt Peggy…” He breathed in horror. Usnavi approached him and took the note from Sonny, reading it over himself.

_My dearest Usnavi, Sonny, and Chip,_

_By the time you read this note, my life will be at it's end. My heart is as cold as ike and I find life inbearable. I know your children may not understand the sad life of a dowadger, or what would have Leaded me to this desperate akt, but please know that I am much happier this way._

_As my last will and testament, I leave you three in the care of Captain Sham, a kind and honorable m en. Please think of me kindly even though I'd done this terrible thing. _

_You'_ _re Aunt Peggy._

“No…” Usnavi whispered, shaking his head as he turned the note over in case there was anything they missed, anything to say that this was some cruel trick. Chip sat by the window and let out many pitiful whines and whimpers, while the two cousins slowly embraced, disbelief still colliding in their systems.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *long sigh* Oh I hope season 2 can give me more of a kick for this...

**Author's Note:**

> I'm hoping to write a side story along with this involving missing scenes since this writing style is very summary-based. So worry not, if there are any scenes you want more details on, you will eventually get them. ;)
> 
> Also, Chip is a character from my other story 'The Two Cousins' if you wish to know where he came from.


End file.
